FanDuel - WFBC

October 31, 2007

What was Kitna Thinking?: Kitna mocks assistant coach with Halloween costume (Photo Included.)

posted by Bill Lumbergh to football at 06:51 AM - 45 comments

Niiiiiiiiiiice. Stay classy, Jon Kitna. Also ... Cullen later pleaded no contest to driving while nude. This is an actual charge in Michigan?

posted by wfrazerjr at 07:10 AM on October 31

Ever been to Michigan, Fraze? Trust me, you don't want to see those people naked. Extremely corn fed, and extremely pale. Eventually, the law had to step in.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 08:09 AM on October 31

That's a great costume. Not a great choice, per se, but a great costume. I'd say lighten up, (I mean, guy drives around naked, picks up some Wendy's and what - we're supposed to not have a good time with it?) but I have a feeling that good ol' frowney face NFL won't.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 08:32 AM on October 31

My thoughts exactly, Weedy. Expecting the rest of the world to respect your privacy when you've shared your privates with a Wendy's cashier is too much to ask. But it won't be easy for the Lions to handle the QB mocking a coach in public.

posted by rcade at 08:43 AM on October 31

It's a nice costume but definitely not the classiest move.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 08:51 AM on October 31

Cullen, the Lions' defensive line coach, was arrested Aug. 24, 2006, in Dearborn on suspicion of inin in in Dearborn on suspiciaion decent in Dearborn on suspicion of indecent and obscene conduct for driving on a public street while nude. Cullen pulled his sport-utility vehicle into a late-night Wendy's drive-through. Dude, last time I was in Dearborn on suspicion of inin in in Dearborn on suspiciaion decent in Dearborn, I did the same exact thing.

posted by Hugh Janus at 09:30 AM on October 31

It's no more offensive than anything Clinton Portis does on a weekly basis.

posted by Tinman at 10:16 AM on October 31

Good for Kitna, that's hilarious.

posted by insomnyuk at 10:37 AM on October 31

Okay, Detroit finally has a mediocre team, let the man have fun with it. Get off his ass you media whores...

posted by Marko2020 at 10:50 AM on October 31

I know the writer is outraged but is Cullen? If Kitna thinks it's ok to dress up like this then I'm guessing the players joke about it with Cullen. Or maybe Kitna's just an ass.

posted by tron7 at 11:10 AM on October 31

It's no more offensive than anything Clinton Portis does on a weekly basis. Clinton Portis hasn't done anything for a year or so. Which of his outfits were offensive?

posted by yerfatma at 11:13 AM on October 31

- Yerfatma - everything about Clinton Portis was offensive. How many polyesters had to die for those wigs alone?

posted by Tinman at 11:18 AM on October 31

Honestly, I think it's kind of classless, and a bit mean to someone with a real problem he's already served time for and is trying to address, especially coming from someone as vocal and pious about his religious beliefs as Kitna. Way to kick someone when they're down. That's the Golden Rule in action right there. May Jon Kitna never do anything wrong ever in his life. I'm not dissing his religion. I'm dissing his selective application of his religion in ridiculing his friends and coworkers in their hour of weakness.

posted by chicobangs at 12:08 PM on October 31

Damn, that's funny. It would have been funnier if Kitna had worn his cross hat that the NFL fined him for a few years ago. Nothing says that you're devoting your life to Jesus more than a nude body suit with a thong. Oh, yeah, and not to pick nits, bot Sharp, old boy, those are known as "pigtails." Not that we expect journalists to know everything, but most people at the age of 5 know the difference between pigtails and a pony tail. If you're going to be a self-righteous prick, maybe put a little effort into your writing.

posted by tahoemoj at 12:09 PM on October 31

I say if you're looking for class, go to the opera, not a costume party. I have weighed both offenses (that of Cullen and Kitna) on my pious scales of righteous justice and have deemed Kitna's action the lesser of the two. The last time I was arrested for picking up a classic double combo whilst driving with THX-1138 1/2 exposed for all to see, I kind of expected to be made fun of by my co-workers.

posted by THX-1138 at 01:05 PM on October 31

You know, I did the same thing, and of the two, Cullen is actually trying to make himself a better person and atone for his sins, while Kitna is acting like his turds don't stink. There's a story in some book I read once about pointing out the mote in someone else's eye while ignoring the log in your own. If I could track that book down, I'd recommend Kitna give it a read. And I look for class everywhere. Class is treating people the way you'd want to be treated yourself. There's nowhere in this world where that doesn't apply.

posted by chicobangs at 01:10 PM on October 31

and chicobangs is still my hero :)

posted by scully at 01:48 PM on October 31

Anyone who knows Drew Sharps writing knows he hates the Lions and is generally just a negative nancy. I find it more than funny how many of you are slamming Kitna for this. Since when has Halloween ever had anything to do with "class"? Seriously, the people that have a problem with this are the same folks who think tag needs to be banned becuase it hurts the slow kids feelings, or that teachers shouldn't use red ink to correct papers.

posted by Hannibal at 02:46 PM on October 31

chico, are you claiming to have first-hand knowledge of the degree of odiferousness of Kitna's turds? I look for class within myself and don't expect too much of the elements that are out of my control, i.e. people's behavior. Lest I be disappointed in the results of my search. Please note that I didn't say that I thought that Kitna was a measuring stick of high moral fiber and class; rather I was trying to express the opinion that Cullen, whose efforts to atone I am not aware of, made the more heinous or perhaps, less "classy" move. I wouldn't claim to know, but I would wager that the real victim in all this is the Wendy's employee. Maybe this is the one black mark on Cullen's record of action. Maybe he has done everything charitable within his ability to make good on the error of his ways. I don't have the facts on that. I don't think I will get too worked up over a Halloween costume, though. My remarks were born out of an effort to be funny, which I apparently failed at miserably. Now I shall prepare the coals and rake.

posted by THX-1138 at 02:54 PM on October 31

Plus noone still knows whether Cullen finds it funny or not. He may have suggested it to Kitna for all we know.

posted by Ricardo at 03:03 PM on October 31

I'm surprised that no one went to the party dressed as Kitna. To do it right, you have to lie on your back with a football in your hand while wearing a Kitna Lions jersey and with a mannequin dressed in an opposing team's uniform lying on top of you.

posted by grum@work at 03:46 PM on October 31

I find it more than funny how many of you are slamming Kitna for this. I find it more than funny how some people can make a big deal out of counting to one.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 03:52 PM on October 31

I thought it was funny when I saw the pic and read the article. (and yeah, the nonsensical error -- crappy cut-and-paste? accidental MS-Word drag-and-drop? nonexistent editing? -- that Hugh pointed out was classic. If you're gonna get sanctimonious, at least make sure your writing doesn't look like the journalistic equivalent of driving drunk and naked through the Wendy's drive-thru.) Gosh, I've read the comments here, back and forth, on both sides. It's still funny. Cruel but funny.

posted by worldcup2002 at 05:23 PM on October 31

all halloween is is an excuse for kids to overindulge on candy,and for people to dress like idiots.all Kitna did was dress like an idiot that he knew personally.

posted by mars1 at 06:02 PM on October 31

Kitna regrets the scrutiny created by the costume. Grum, according to the article I linked to someone did indeed go to the party dressed as Kitna.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 07:31 PM on October 31

Kitna regrets the scrutiny created by the costume. Well, now we all know that Jon Kitna is stupid as a box of rocks. What did he think was gonna happen?

posted by lil_brown_bat at 07:42 PM on October 31

Grum, according to the article I linked to someone did indeed go to the party dressed as Kitna. D'oh! I still think my idea is better.

posted by grum@work at 08:02 PM on October 31

Wow, why all the Kitna hating? This is a real strange one. He's averaging 250 yds per game, his team is 5-2, and his QB rating is a not-so-horrible 93.4. And this is for the Lions. Is there something more than a dumb costume conspiring against him that I am missing?

posted by THX-1138 at 08:04 PM on October 31

I think it was better too. Although it is hard to bob for apples while lying on your back. THX grum was referring to the fact that Kitna has been sacked more times than anyone else in the league, a grand total of 34. The next worse team is the Eagles, who have only allowed 27 sacks. Interestingly enough, the first site I found while searching for the stats I wanted to reference was a UK site.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 08:43 PM on October 31

Wow, why all the Kitna hating? Well, if you were an alcoholic who had just been discharged from prison for what was hopefully your last relapse, and were trying to put your life and dignity back together, and then one of your co-workers decided to make a national joke of your life's darkest moment, wouldn't you think he was being maybe just a tad insensitive? I don't care how well he's doing his job. This is about being decent to the people around you. At that, Jon Kitna is a failure.

posted by chicobangs at 11:09 PM on October 31

Class is treating people the way you'd want to be treated yourself. There's nowhere in this world where that doesn't apply. Except for tops and bottoms in an S&M club.

posted by owlhouse at 04:49 AM on November 01

Not that getting your ass beaten bloody with a studded ping-pong paddle doesn't retain its own sort of quiet dignity.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:55 AM on November 01

You've got the wrong dom, pal.

posted by yerfatma at 07:19 AM on November 01

Okay - best costume idea ever: Tu-Spock. Combination of Tu-Pac and Spock. Think about it.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 10:35 AM on November 01

Holy crap! Someone with better photoshop skills than me has got to put that photo together. I think I have a costume idea for next year already!

posted by hawkguy at 11:44 AM on November 01

chico, I think you and I are looking at two different sides of the same horse. From all published accounts I could find (OK, YYM's link), it seems as though Cullen doesn't have a problem with it. I guess I might have to side with the victim of Kitna's costume prank. If he's OK, I'm OK. Also the team considers it a "non issue". In reference to Kitna's horizontal QBing style, I think his O line has to be partly to blame. I threw up those stats just as a means to show that Kitna isn't wretched, and to keep my membership on this site as a sports fan, and not just an ass. grum has nothing to fear from me. Unless he plays the sax. And oddly enough (or not) Weedy, I have all the pieces to make that costume but had never thought of combining them. I shall endeavor to do so and see about posting the results.

posted by THX-1138 at 12:27 PM on November 01

I guess I might have to side with the victim of Kitna's costume prank. If he's OK, I'm OK. Also the team considers it a "non issue". Cullen can't complain about it without dividing the team. Making fun of someone who is struggling with alcoholism is a bad idea even if that person doesn't tell you that it is. I think it is great that Cullen is taking the costume so well. But, rubbing someone's face in what had to be one of the low points of his life is just insensitive.

posted by bperk at 01:56 PM on November 01

reference to Kitna's horizontal QBing style, I think his O line has to be partly to blame. Of course. Yes Kitna isn't the most mobile of fellows but the O-Line isn't doing much to help out. That and earlier in the season the Lions had no running game at all which allowed opponets to pass rush at will. Hopefully with the re-emergence of Kevin Jones that'll take a turn for the better.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 02:21 PM on November 01

And oddly enough (or not) Weedy, I have all the pieces to make that costume but had never thought of combining them. I shall endeavor to do so and see about posting the results. Wait -that would mean you have a baseball hat, a gold chain and an entire Star Trek Science Officer uniform. Give me your lunch money.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 03:35 PM on November 01

Give me your lunch money. Oh, God, not again.

posted by THX-1138 at 03:56 PM on November 01

I think I saw Tu-Spock making the rounds last night. A surreal experience, this half-naked dark Vulcan in droopy jeans goin' on about the Digital Underground. "Round 'n' round, round 'n' round ..."

posted by worldcup2002 at 05:59 PM on November 01

I'm assuming Tu-Spock is the undisputed leader in the Vulcan rap genre.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 06:04 PM on November 01

Spittin' hardcore rhymes 'bout the Pon-Farr ya'll. Gettin' all Kohlinarr up in hear. (Look, I'm all out of lunch money. Leave me alone.)

posted by THX-1138 at 06:18 PM on November 01

"When we talked yesterday, the first question out of his mouth was, `Did you win?' He seemed to not have a problem with it." If this is true, then I think it behooves us to turn all of our outrage into inrage. Friends can make fun of friends' nude drunk driving arrests. It's well-established man law.

posted by rcade at 06:32 PM on November 01

rcade, i couldn't agree more. The only problem is that Cullen could be trying to be nonchalant (sp?) about it, but really is pissed off. I guess we can only go with what he actually said though.

posted by brainofdtrain at 12:30 PM on November 05

You're not logged in. Please log in or register.