January 10, 2012

Packers Coach Loses Son in Apparent Drowning: A body found in Wisconsin's Fox River Monday afternoon is that of Michael Philbin, the missing 21-year-old son of Green Bay Packers offensive coordinator Joe Philbin. The younger Philbin was last heard from at 2 a.m. Sunday while visiting friends in Oshkosh. A 911 call at 2:36 a.m. that night indicated a person was calling for help in thin ice on the river 30 yards from shore, but rescue crews didn't find anyone.

posted by rcade to football at 01:04 PM - 14 comments

This story is sad, but not as sad as reading peoples comments on the blogs of sites like yahoo sports. The things people write is often sickening and beyond offensive and just dickheadish. I would like to take this opportunity to thank our Spo Fi hosts for running a good site that keeps all the trash out. That being said, I know I will now be attacked without mercy for kissing up or brown-nosing to the like of rcade and justgary so screw you guys..

posted by Debo270 at 01:52 PM on January 10, 2012

Oh, man, my heart goes out to the Philbins.

And seconding what Debo270 wrote. Thanks for running a classy joint, guys.

posted by Joey Michaels at 01:59 PM on January 10, 2012

Of course it is sad for his family, but the guy was convicted of raping two girls so maybe this isn't a case where you should expect a ton of sympathy.

posted by bperk at 05:40 PM on January 10, 2012

And that's why you're not a professional eulogist.

posted by yerfatma at 06:54 PM on January 10, 2012

Of course it is sad for his family, but the guy was convicted of raping two girls so maybe this isn't a case where you should expect a ton of sympathy.

Expect, no, human nature being what it is, and human beings mostly not being given to really thinking things through. OTOH, I don't have any problems dredging up sympathy for his parents. When your child harms others, don't you think that would cause you terrible pain? And if your child then dies, do you really think you'd just shrug and say, "Good riddance"? His family is in a lot of pain, not of their making. "A ton of sympathy" seems like just what's called for here.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 07:15 PM on January 10, 2012

maybe this isn't a case where you should expect a ton of sympathy

You would get sympathy from other parents who have had a child derail and then depart before the family ever got the chance to find out if they could eventually successfully help the troubled soul.

The not knowing if you could have made things better down the road is a different kind of hurt than the hurt of losing a shining star, but it's still powerful pain. Especially for families who had already been through a lot of pain caused by the person they lost, but had established a deep commitment to providing help and seeing the person through.

And with the timing of this, who knows what's going through that family's mind at this moment?

posted by beaverboard at 07:21 PM on January 10, 2012

beaverboard, excellently put.

Losing a child is losing a child. The Philbin family has my sympathies for their loss.

posted by evixir at 09:47 PM on January 10, 2012

What beaverboard said.

posted by steelergirl at 10:00 PM on January 10, 2012

Nope, sorry, good riddance to bad rubbish. Karma's a bitch.

posted by insomnyuk at 11:11 PM on January 10, 2012

His family is in a lot of pain, not of their making. "A ton of sympathy" seems like just what's called for here.

That's true for everyone, no matter whether the particular death is a net gain for humanity. If you frame every death from the perspective of grieving parents, then all of them will be sad. I'm not sure that that is the best lens through which to view these things. As people who know none of the parties involved, why is the parent's perspective the only permissible one? Why can't we look at it from the perspective of his victims?

posted by bperk at 08:30 AM on January 11, 2012

His family is in a lot of pain, not of their making.

I don't know anything about the rape charges as the article mentioned nothing of it, but if they are true then obviously this kid had a lot of problems and nobody knows if they were or were not of the family's making. I would not want to speculate as to the causes. The creation of a sexual criminal or rapist typically has some roots in the family, but I do feel a lot of sympathy for the family, as the loss of a child under any circumstance has to be unbelievably painful and they have a lot to cope with. In a sense they are victims too. I suppose if you are the normal and decent parent of a mass murderer, rapist, criminal, or severely troubled child, the knowledge of what your child has grown into must be source of agonizing pain and guilt, and is deserving of sympathy. On the other hand, if as the parent your neglect or abuse was the root cause, then not so much. This is not specifically directed at this case, as again I only know what I have read, bu to agree with insomnyuk Karma is a bitch.

posted by Atheist at 11:16 AM on January 11, 2012

Michael Philbin "was sentenced to six months in jail in 2009 after he was convicted of misdemeanor counts of sexually assaulting two teen girls and two counts of battery. The convictions were removed from his record after he successfully completed probation."

The original arrest complaint alleged that when he was 18, he had "non-consensual sex" with two girls over age 16 who said they were incapacitatingly drunk at his Brown County home during an August 2009 party when his parents weren't home. Another story reports that the complaint alleged that Philbin and a friend forced one girl to have sex in the living room, then he helped the second to his parents' bedroom and had sex with her after she passed out.

The prosecutor's comment in the last link suggests that they did not have the evidence to prove felony sex assault: "We filed what we believed we could prove and we are satisfied with the sentence imposed by the court."

Even if the allegations in the complaint are 100 percent true, when he died Philbin was still a 21-year-old who had a lifetime ahead of him that could have been filled with good acts. If you believe at all in the idea of redemption, you shouldn't view his death as karma. There isn't a state in the U.S. that executes rapists, but some people here and elsewhere are suggesting his death was just deserts.

posted by rcade at 11:23 AM on January 11, 2012

Nope, sorry, good riddance to bad rubbish. Karma's a bitch.

Well, so much for having a class site (unless my sarcasm meter is way out of calibration).

posted by Howard_T at 05:32 PM on January 11, 2012

If you frame every death from the perspective of grieving parents

Was that not exactly what you were talking about when you said, "Of course it is sad for his family, but the guy was convicted of raping two girls so maybe this isn't a case where you should expect a ton of sympathy." Who on earth were you talking about sympathizing with, if not the family?

posted by lil_brown_bat at 09:12 AM on January 12, 2012

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