December 07, 2004

EPL Fantasy League Week 16: High scores all round.

posted by BigCalm to fantasy at 03:23 AM - 75 comments

# Team Manager Gam Tot
1 Deadly Calm Big Calm 62 910
2 Crap City United g s p m 65 890
3 Sauril's Wideboys Mark D 67 872
4 Ardley Athletic Squealy Neily 79 863
5 BillSaysThisSCORES!! Bill Lazar 71 859
6 RED DRAGONS! worldcup 2002 80 856
7 the pistolwhippets Ufez Jones 76 821
8 40,000 Headmen Fat Buddha 62 813
9 Salmacis FC Huw Morris 72 810
10 Spacemen United Jason Wilder 80 807
11 Cutters Redux mbd1 mbd1 70 804
12 FC Murcielago skronk _ 72 799
13 kwacky's kwitters mr kwacky 79 799
14 phatcat footie garfield on catnip 83 784
15 ATL Untitled Tim Truxell 55 780
16 Arsenal's Back Four Pete W 52 770
17 sporting lisbian john o'neill 78 761
18 Cream of Chicken Ian Townsend 74 757
19 Terrapin Utd R Scully 68 733
20 Bayern Mucus Danny the Taupe 70 721
21 Blammos! Star Unsuitable 52 709
22 Bosiak Bashers etrader 9 67 671
23 Mossy Unathletic Me Mossy 40 641
24 born to lose J B 52 621
25 Slow And Foamy J Warwick 39 612
26 last again eckeric eckeric 57 609
27 Cool Springs United John Hill 48 594
28 Napsacks lil nemo 33 491

posted by BigCalm at 03:24 AM on December 07

It was hoping this was my big chance to be highlighted on Clammy's table. Alas and alack I fell short by one measly point. *shakes fist at sky*

posted by squealy at 06:48 AM on December 07

62 ain't bad, but it could have been so much more. I'm suicidal.

posted by Fat Buddha at 07:10 AM on December 07

i'd like to thank Chelsea's midfield corps and the return of mr.unreeeeal.

posted by garfield at 09:29 AM on December 07

I'd like to thank Mr Lampard and my brilliant decision to make him captain. For my next trick, my captain will be a goalkeeper who scores a hattrick - headed corner, penalty, and long-ass goalkick.

posted by worldcup2002 at 08:00 PM on December 07

I think sauril is sweating. Or peeing his pants. Or both.

posted by worldcup2002 at 08:01 PM on December 07

worldcup, make sure you ask why gspm thinks he is so far up the table in the interview...

posted by StarFucker at 08:53 AM on December 08

Oh, you have anticipated one of my top questions. Shhhhhh.

posted by worldcup2002 at 12:40 PM on December 08

Somebody scored 96 this week in another league I'm in. Bastard. I'm still ahead of him though. It's a shame I made such a poor start. I've not been at all bad the last 10 weeks or so. Fat Buddha, I'm gunning for ya!

posted by salmacis at 03:13 PM on December 08

You're in ANOTHER LEAGUE?!?! TRAITOR!

posted by StarFucker at 03:19 PM on December 08

It is because there are 26 shlubs people worse than me that I am in 2nd. It also involves a strategy called "Look at what SF did last week and do the opposite".

posted by gspm at 03:22 PM on December 08

Maybe you should join another league. Say, one with 19 players? Then you'd be sure to break the top 20.

posted by gspm at 03:23 PM on December 08

anyone have a sense of what'll happen in the game between Arsenal and Chelsea? Highscoring affair? 1-0? blow out on one side? a draw? I can't seem to set my mind in any direction for this one. Also, anyone loading up on liverpool players with their double game week?

posted by garfield at 10:13 AM on December 09

First rule of double game week - don't talk about double game week. But to answer your questions, no and no.

posted by squealy at 12:19 PM on December 09

right? i knew i had screwed that up...but with all the Liverpool talk 'round here, I figured it wasn't much of a secret. i'm calling a 3-2 chelsea win....just for shits and giggles.

posted by garfield at 12:22 PM on December 09

And I'll play the homer and call it a 3-2 Arsenal win just to be contrary.

posted by trox at 01:59 PM on December 09

right on

posted by garfield at 02:20 PM on December 09

I'm calling a 0-0...just cause i like attention.

posted by StarFucker at 02:21 PM on December 09

sounds likely...what with the two most prolific offenses in the league going head to head.

posted by garfield at 03:02 PM on December 09

Forget Arsenal-Chelsea, what about the Liverpool Derby? Is this the week Gerrard & Co. let everyone know that 3rd or 4th in the table is going to be their's or is it the weekend Everton show steel?

posted by billsaysthis at 06:08 PM on December 09

If either game's going to be a 0-0 it'll be Everton v Liverpool. But overhyped games have a habit of being shite so I'd have Arse v Chelsea as second favourite.

posted by squealy at 06:18 PM on December 09

posted by Fat Buddha at 09:25 AM on December 12

Interesting results in our table so far, in front of results from ManU/Fullham and 'Pool/Pompey. Apparently many of us picked the wrong week to not have Henry as Captain, very few of us have ManU players and WTF was Benitez doing keeping Alonso to a short sub stint yesterday (as several of us have him as captain this double shot week).

posted by billsaysthis at 03:18 PM on December 12

Alonso was on the bench cause he's little... Everton and Liverpool usually beat each other up in these games so he thought Diao would be more combative. Not entirely a bad idea...

posted by StarFucker at 05:21 PM on December 12

Diao really made a huge difference SF, so I would have at least like give Alonso a chance to show some toughness. Meanwhile no one was giving Mellor and Pongolle useful service and then again there's that *throat clearing* unproven 4-5-1 formation Benitez is insisting on using for away matches.

posted by billsaysthis at 10:01 PM on December 12

Yes yes...Pongolle and Mellor had no service, but they didn't exactly get into space either. They seemed anonymous throughout the match. Alonso came on but nothing really came of it, did it?

posted by StarFucker at 11:36 PM on December 12

Someone shut these Blues fans up please. Or kill them. Or throw them into the nevermost pit of hell.

posted by BigCalm at 03:34 AM on December 13

posted by Fat Buddha at 11:18 AM on December 13

posted by squealy at 01:54 PM on December 13

That picture is not big enough...

posted by StarFucker at 02:14 PM on December 13

If either game's going to be a 0-0 it'll be Everton v Liverpool. But overhyped games have a habit of being shite so I'd have Arse v Chelsea as second favourite. Did anyone predict a 2-2 draw in a very exciting match? I'm a little disappointed in the result, especially with Henry missing the sitter in the 80th minute (how often does that happen though). Still a very entertaining match. Do we have to just accept that Everton are for real now?

posted by trox at 02:40 PM on December 13

i need a primer over who here is a blues fan and who is a villa fan. i'll figure it out with some look at profiles or it should be obvious as the hoo ha continues. or i guess i could visit the epl pool to see the team allegiances people have chosen. now, everton. i was gonna ask after reading a game recap a few weeks ago that had a line to the effect of "Everton's title hopes are still on track after...". So i was wondering - what happened to Everton this year? Last year they were contenders for the drop (if i recall) and this year Radzinski left the team and they sold their best player/asset Rooney (and took the money to cover debt, if i recall, rather than reinvest in players) - so what accounts for Everton's improvement this year? I haven't followed the team that closely but wonder if there is something in the Everton mix that can buoy the hopes of teams in the lower half of the league this year.

posted by gspm at 03:22 PM on December 13

Everton sucks and will be 14 or lower in a month or two...you will see the fastest drop in history.

posted by StarFucker at 03:42 PM on December 13

if i didn't know better i'd say that you sound like a liverpool fan.

posted by gspm at 06:43 PM on December 13

Everton plays with an airtight defence, five hardworking runners in midfield, and a big player upfront who likes chasing long, high balls. You can't call them lucky at this point in the season, and they sure don't make a lot of mistakes. As for the Birmingham bog bandits, as far as I can tell, it's Fat Buddha and squealy on the Blue side, and Calmy on the Claret side. Derbies aside, I think their fantasy league positions pretty much reflect their real-life teams' positions. (I think salmacis is a West Brom fan, a somewhat "peripheral" bog bandit? The first three are the real troublemakers. Especially FB and squealy. We're bostin' mate!)

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:46 PM on December 13

i need a primer over who here is a blues fan and who is a villa fan. i'll figure it out with some look at profiles or it should be obvious as the hoo ha continues. or i guess i could visit the epl pool to see the team allegiances people have chosen. I'm the only Villa fan here (that I know of). Which means I've had the traditional piss-taking by the numerous Blues fans on this site for the last 3 years, and I'd manage to convince myself that this year was going to be different. Sigh. Notable Bongos are Fat Buddha, Squealy, and a few other people like Kwacky. Salamcis is a Baggies fan, for his sins. I'll post the league here when the site gets updated.

posted by BigCalm at 04:29 AM on December 14

I would like to point out to MrI'mGoingToBeLookingDownOnYou2002 that if Alonso gets more than two points this afternoon (he's my captain this week) that not only will he be even further behind me on points, I will jump over squealy to 4th place while he has no one involved in today's match and no injury subs to account for (that I can see). Neener neener!!!

posted by billsaysthis at 12:30 PM on December 14

You're right bill man. I'm screwed. Fourth place is yours for one week at least.

posted by squealy at 12:35 PM on December 14

0-0 at half-time and the commentator just said Liverpool's performance was "dreadful" and "inept". Also my cable modem appears to be giving up the ghost so I'm heading for the pub.

posted by squealy at 03:12 PM on December 14

Gerrard looked to haved saved their bacon yet again, but a LuaLua stoppage-time equalizer forces Liverpool to settle for a single point. I know that's damn frustrating (says an Arsenal fan twice disappointed by Liverpool's late heroics).

posted by trox at 04:07 PM on December 14

cost me a couple of points off gerrard (captain for the week) missing the shutout. those woulda been handy seeing as sauril was quasi in 2nd due to some bench points he's due but i think gerrard's goal is enough to keep me in 2nd.

posted by gspm at 04:10 PM on December 14

Wow, I went from the heights last week to the dumps this week. But didn't budge a spot. I am most aggrieved.

posted by worldcup2002 at 04:15 PM on December 14

I'm in Amsterdam for the next three days so I won't be able to get internet access and post a table when they finally do the automatic subs. Can someone step up to the plate?

posted by BigCalm at 06:16 PM on December 14

I blame Hyypia for the equalizer, he should never have let LuaLua get in that close, but mainly I blame Kewell who had plenty of opportunities and blew every single one. Why Rafa left him in to the end, or even started him ahead of Mellor, is my mystery for the week.

posted by billsaysthis at 06:54 PM on December 14

# Team Manager Gam Tot
1 Deadly Calm Big Calm 62 972
2 Crap City United g s p m 60 950
3 Sauril's Wideboys Mark D 69 941
4 BillSaysThisSCORES!! Bill Lazar 50 909
5 Ardley Athletic Squealy Neily 45 908
6 RED DRAGONS! worldcup 2002 38 894
7 the pistolwhippets Ufez Jones 47 868
8 Spacemen United Jason Wilder 53 860
9 Salmacis FC Huw Morris 47 857
10 40,000 Headmen Fat Buddha 41 854
11 Cutters Redux mbd1 mbd1 46 850
12 FC Murcielago skronk _ 43 842
13 kwacky's kwitters mr kwacky 42 841
14 Arsenal's Back Four Pete W 61 831
15 ATL Untitled Tim Truxell 54 830
16 phatcat footie garfield on catnip 39 823
17 Cream of Chicken Ian Townsend 47 804
18 sporting lisbian john o'neill 41 802
19 Terrapin Utd R Scully 53 786
20 Blammos! Star Unsuitable 49 754
21 Bayern Mucus Danny the Taupe 30 751
22 Bosiak Bashers etrader 9 45 716
23 born to lose J B 51 672
24 Mossy Unathletic Me Mossy 25 666
25 Slow And Foamy J Warwick 46 658
26 last again eckeric eckeric 36 645
27 Cool Springs United John Hill 40 634
28 Napsacks lil nemo 22 513

posted by gspm at 07:17 AM on December 15

Kewell looked good and is looking better every game... He had a few nice shots. Portsmouth tied it up on accident... That last ball in was supposed to be a cross but he miskicked it... Shit luck.

posted by StarFucker at 09:45 AM on December 15

Kewell may miss Australia friendlies due to lingering groin and ankle injuries. The Aussie coach says if he doesn't get a decent rest before the end of the EPL season he'll need surgery.

posted by billsaysthis at 03:24 PM on December 15

DAMMIT!!!

posted by StarFucker at 03:36 PM on December 15

woohoo!what a week. the magic 6 point crystal palace defender substitution is what did it. I am now closer to 1st than 4th!

posted by sauril at 11:49 AM on December 17

Dammit, get well soon Freddy! I can't afford the double transfer hit.

posted by trox at 12:31 PM on December 17

Fucking Benitez! I still say Diao over Alonso cost us the match. And therefore me plenty of points.

posted by billsaysthis at 04:29 PM on December 17

Well, it's week 18 now, folks. And it looks like my fortunes have now swung to the other end of the scale. Again. At this time of they year, I think it's only appropriate to say: Ho Ho Ho!

posted by worldcup2002 at 03:14 PM on December 18

Enjoy it while it lasts. You have only Henry left to play while I have Henry (as captain and you have to like him to score against Portsmouth), Bergkamp and Alonso to come tomorrow. Though since Squealy has Henry-as-captain left as well making me doubt that I'll do better than push you down. Again.

posted by billsaysthis at 04:23 PM on December 18

At the top, Calmy's 10 spot lead is as narrow as I've noticed this year but with Henry-as-captain, Reyes and Fuller left to earn points against only Henry-as-captain and Hreiderson for Sauril that will probably expand before the round finishes.

posted by billsaysthis at 04:26 PM on December 18

I have a striker who played the full game in a match where his team scored 5 goals and he got me 0 points. Fuckin stupid game this is.

posted by Fat Buddha at 08:40 AM on December 19

while the table above shows a good week for me sauril make a good gain on me. and this week should show another big gain from him that should put him in second. colour me impatient, if i've lost my sizable lead over sauril and stopped gaining on top spot then something needs to be done. big hit on transfers this week (and making them immediately, a whole week before the next games, probably a bad idea). whatever epl team building advice i gave in my interview has been ignored. at the very least my interest is spiked in my team in the next few weeks, hoping for instant dividends.

posted by gspm at 02:04 PM on December 19

Yay, Liverpool!

posted by billsaysthis at 03:51 PM on December 19

bill: Though since Squealy has Henry-as-captain left as well making me doubt that I'll do better than push you down. Again. What was that bill? Didn't quite hear you. He who laughs last, laughs longest. Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho !

posted by worldcup2002 at 05:58 PM on December 19

Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho! Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho! Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho! Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho! Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho Ho! Okay, now I laughed last. Top that!

posted by billsaysthis at 06:12 PM on December 19

You both ho's.

posted by squealy at 06:27 PM on December 19

Gameweek 18: worldcup2002 73pts #5 bill "push you down again" 48pts #6 Top that. Hohohohohohohohohohohohohohohoho!

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:36 PM on December 19

btw, I want a video of that Kewell turn and pass and the ensuing Baros goal.

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:37 PM on December 19

Fucking Kewell... You guys heard that he needs surgery if he doesn't get a rest soon? I wish he would start performing the way he did when he was at Leeds. He's getting there...i wish he'd hurry up.

posted by StarFucker at 01:34 AM on December 20

I'm top at Christmas! Huzzah! (And you all know what happens to teams that finish top at christmas? That's right, 6th if I'm lucky.)

posted by BigCalm at 03:11 AM on December 20

....fucking Henry as Captain.

posted by garfield at 09:33 AM on December 20

10 PRINT "Ho!" 20 GOTO 10 I win.

posted by BigCalm at 11:10 AM on December 20

Calmy, Fantasy league champ and BASIC guru. 15 IF user="BigCalm" THEN action="slap.self"

posted by worldcup2002 at 11:44 AM on December 20

Merry Christmas everyone! Here's to some exciting Christmas and New Year gameweeks! The game is afoot and both sauril and gspm are hot on Calmy's trail. Game on!

posted by worldcup2002 at 11:47 AM on December 20

11 points from the top, and I have someone playing today! I can't believe Henry only got 2 points against Portsmouth...

posted by sauril at 12:36 PM on December 20

Yeah, sauril, I just noticed that too. I mean, if Charlton have a shutout and Hreidarsson has an assist and a goal ... you might be the new #1 by Christmas! Woowoowoo.

posted by worldcup2002 at 02:14 PM on December 20

Charlton have a shutout as of the 36:30 mark, up 1-0 on a goal from Thomas. Hreiderson started, so if this holds up especially the clean sheet, he ought to be good for nice pointage.

posted by billsaysthis at 02:55 PM on December 20

whew, that's all I can say. I'll do the update tomorrow.

posted by BigCalm at 05:12 PM on December 20

2-1 final score. 2 "thanks for showing up" points... still, not a bad week.

posted by sauril at 05:15 PM on December 20

Lucky Calmy, your Christmas gift came early this year.

posted by worldcup2002 at 05:38 PM on December 20

You're not logged in. Please log in or register.