NBA Trademarks 6 Possible names for Oklahoma's team...: and they are 6 of the worst names I've ever heard.
posted by freeze_over98 to basketball at 05:40 PM - 44 comments
Citing the United States Trademark and Patent Office, the newspaper said that the league filed for a trademark on Barons, Bison, Energy, Marshalls, Thunder and Wind. and they are 6 of the worst names I've ever heard. Personally, I think the worst name option is the OC (Mad) Bombers. Both tasteless and offensive - but it shows there are lots of worse options than the ones in the article. Instead of the Wind or Thunder, what about the Tornado(s) or the Drought? I think most OC residents could relate to these two. I remember when the St Louis area was considering the name Purple Stallions when the Rams relocated. How pathetic is that?
posted by knowsalittle at 06:48 PM on July 26
Here were the choices for the Orlando franchise: Heat, Tropics, Juice, Magic Here were the choices for the Toronto franchise: Beavers, Bobcats, Dragons, Grizzlies, Hogs, Raptors, Scorpions, T-Rex, Tarantulas, and Terriers Here were the choices for the Charlotte franchise: Flight, Bobcats, Dragons (and Spirit and Hornets for the original one) In general, the choices don't seem to be that great. However, the name that usually wins is good enough that people aren't complaining about it for too long. I'm surprised they didn't try to bring "Dragons" over to the Oklahoma franchise. That is their stand-by option, it seems.
posted by grum@work at 06:52 PM on July 26
BTW, OC Barons doesn't sound so bad. But that might be my old NHL bias kicking in.
posted by grum@work at 06:57 PM on July 26
The Bison might be the best one there, but its still not all that great.
posted by freeze_over98 at 07:27 PM on July 26
The Marshalls seems alright to me. Not great, but not painfully stupid like Thunder and Wind.
posted by blarp at 08:23 PM on July 26
I'm also a fan of Oklahoma Barons. It's a solid name that's evocative of the state's oil drilling history but it doesn't try to hard. But if they choose it, they need to trade for this guy.
posted by rcade at 08:42 PM on July 26
Call them the 89ers.
posted by NoMich at 08:55 PM on July 26
Bison? And why the misspelled 'Marshal'? Marshall?
posted by geekyguy at 09:39 PM on July 26
i like what an espn reporter suggested...the Oklahoma City Outlaws. But other than that i like marshalls.
posted by ChunkE at 10:41 PM on July 26
I'm also a fan of Oklahoma Barons. It's a solid name that's evocative of the state's oil drilling history but it doesn't try to hard. But if they choose it, they need to trade for this guy. The Oklahoma Beard (s) ?
posted by tommytrump at 10:47 PM on July 26
I've been to Oklahoma once. It made an impression on me. So I would like to vote for the "Oklahoma Dirty and Nasties ..." if that is on the list. If not, whatever they choose is fine.
posted by smithnyiu at 10:51 PM on July 26
I agree it should be 'Marshals'.
posted by blarp at 10:54 PM on July 26
Actually, if they want to truly honor what is great about Oklahoma, they should call them the Flaming Lips.
posted by NoMich at 11:10 PM on July 26
Marshalls evokes the spirit of the Washington Generals. So yeah, go for it.
posted by igottheblues at 02:52 AM on July 27
We already had an "Oklahoma Outlaws". It was a USFL team. Doug Williams was our quarterback one year. We had an "89ers", it was our AAA affiliate in OKC before the new downtown ballpark and name change. And BTW that crap about "OKC Mad Bombers". Not funny asshole. Not even close. Have a little respect.
posted by soonerdude55 at 07:27 AM on July 27
I hate the name OKC Thunder, which is what the local sports news is indicating the team will be named. I go for Outlaws or Marshals, even Barons, but Thunder......yuck.
posted by lil'red at 09:15 AM on July 27
BTW that crap about "OKC Mad Bombers". Not funny asshole. Not even close. Have a little respect. Personally, I think the worst name option is the OC (Mad) Bombers. Both tasteless and offensive. My friend and I were discussing how unimportant a team's name is in the long run. When I mentioned the Tornados, he said why not go one step further and suggest the Bombers. I was the one who found it offensive. I thought I made that clear above. If I was to pick from the six listed in the article,I would pick the Marshals
posted by knowsalittle at 09:25 AM on July 27
Well, Oklahoma was once serious Indian country, and until the Redskins change their name, or the Cleveland Indians dump Chief Wahoo, then I see no reason why we can't keep dipping into our glorious history of ethnic cleansing -- err, "westward expansion" for team monikers. How 'bout the OKC Screaming Cherokees? OKC Battlin' Choctaws? OKC Wild Arapahos (or, to tie into the gangsta demographic, just the 'Hos)? The Wind or Thunder? How very World Football League, c. 1974-75.
posted by afl-aba at 09:34 AM on July 27
posted by grum@work at 09:51 AM on July 27
Wind is the sort of name that strikes fear into opponents. I wonder if the NBA trademarks names like Bison and Wind just to generate more buzz.
posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 10:39 AM on July 27
Truehoop had a good point about naming the team wind.. imagine the headlines "The Lakers Break Wind."
posted by apoch at 10:51 AM on July 27
How about the "OKC Larceny," "OKC Bandits," or the "OKC Asphyxiate-In-Your-Sleep-Clay Bennett," but my favorite is the SEATTLE SUPERSONICS.
posted by NW_Die_Hard at 10:54 AM on July 27
I like the Barons, Bison, and Marshalls. The others sound like WNBA teams. What about the OKC Steer?
posted by BoKnows at 11:57 AM on July 27
That'd only work if they were from Texas.
posted by apoch at 12:10 PM on July 27
Close enough, but I'll concede. OKC Prairie Dogs?
posted by BoKnows at 12:16 PM on July 27
Apoch, how close is OK to Hawaii?
posted by BoKnows at 12:38 PM on July 27
If you think about Oklahoma City's proximity to and history with Tinker Air Force Base, and the fact that the Midwest City High School (for the unacquainted: the suburb in which Tinker AFB is primarily located) nickname/mascot is the Bombers, then I don't think that Bombers is too terribly inappropriate. It wouldn't be in poor taste at all and the people who are repeatedly saying that it is are the ones who need to pull their heads out of their behinds.
posted by igottheblues at 01:19 PM on July 27
You gotta be kidding, Blues. No one would think of Tinker Air Force Base if the team was named the Bombers.
posted by rcade at 01:56 PM on July 27
That'd only work if they were from Texas. Oh yes, Its hard to get around here with all those damn cows blocking our dirt roads.
posted by freeze_over98 at 04:49 PM on July 27
You gotta be kidding, Blues. No one would think of Tinker Air Force Base if the team was named the Bombers. Ditto. When my bud Mike brought up the Bombers name, I didn't think "Hmmm, I wonder if there is an AFB near OKC..". I immediately thought of a picture of a guant faced psycho mass murderer in an orange jumpsuit, and I have to believe almost everyone would.
posted by knowsalittle at 06:23 PM on July 27
How about the Oklahoma Flattened Armadillos in the Middle of the Highway? (After the Oklahoma state animal)
posted by Monkeyhawk at 10:23 PM on July 27
BoKnows, haven't you ever seen Full Metal Jacket?
posted by apoch at 10:56 PM on July 27
I have. And now your comment makes a lot more sense. But you love the name, right?
posted by BoKnows at 11:18 PM on July 27
The only name worse than Bison would definitely be Bombers, at least in OKC. Memories of that day immediately come to mind when that name is combined with that city. I can't decide if the Energy, Thunder and Wind sound too much like the WFL or just too politically correct (or too lame). If you're going in the meteorological direction, how about Tornadoes (or is that Tornados, Dan Quayle)? For some reason I like Prairie Dogs, although the holes in the floor would make fast breaks hazardous. How about Flatlanders? Or, if you really want to go WAY back (think Gary Cooper), how about the Plainsmen? BTW, knowsalittle, since I inadvertently stole Tornadoes (Tornados?), what about Oklahoma "Dust Bowl?" Did St. Louis REALLY consider "Purple Stallions" before the Rams bolted LA? How lame was that?
posted by efarthing1 at 12:02 AM on July 28
Bison isn't all that bad, especially if Danny Fortson is still on the roster come opening night. But screw that, let's go literary. How about the Oklahoma Joads?
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:11 AM on July 28
Steers? Nah, they should go with Robber Barrons.
posted by apoch at 10:42 AM on July 28
If they name the team the Wind, every sportswriter in the country will fancy him or herself an insufferably clever little punk when the get to write the headline "[insert team here] Breaks Wind".
posted by LionIndex at 12:12 PM on July 28
Who was it, rcade or justgary that came up with Oklahoma Sexuals? That is the best #1 all-time great name that doesn't stand a chance. Of course, my bias lies with NW_Die_Hard's sentiments. My own suggestions would also include: Oklahoma Sunzabiches Oklahoma Surrey with a Fringe on Top of their Pointy Ass Heads OklaHoBags Oklahoma Bailonyas Oklahoma miserable lousy rotten............... Alrighty then. I've degenerated into nosense once more.
posted by THX-1138 at 12:26 AM on July 30
Oklahoma Rogers and Hammersteins Oklahoma The Musical Oklahoma Wherethewindcomesroaringdowntheplains Oklahoma T. Boone Pickens Oklahoma Boomers Oklahoma Pokes (in honor of the other college team, plus it can be shortened to Oklapokes) Oklahoma Territory(sp?) Oklahoma team-formerly-known-as-Seattle-Supersonics Oklahoma Hypersonics (the last two just to piss off Seattle residents) Of the ones presented, Barons and Marshalls aren't that bad, actually. Which is why I don't think they'll go for them.
posted by Bonkers at 03:34 AM on July 30
How about the Oklahoma (OK) Corrals?
posted by BornIcon at 06:34 AM on July 30
Those all sound like Arena League names, not even WNBA ones. I guess Barons is acceptable. the rest are kind of crap. Thunder's the worst one. Which means it's the one they're going to pick, right?
posted by chicobangs at 03:50 PM on July 30
I bet Greg Easterbrook is pulling for Thunder. That way they can name the cheerleaders The Lightning. He'll be at every home game waiting to see the Lightning flash.
posted by apoch at 04:57 PM on July 30
smithnyiu wrote: I've been to Oklahoma once. It made an impression on me. So I would like to vote for the "Oklahoma Dirty and Nasties ..." if that is on the list. So, did you have a good or a bad time?
posted by L.N. Smithee at 12:55 PM on July 31
Lion Index wrote: If they name the team the Wind, every sportswriter in the country will fancy him or herself an insufferably clever little punk when the get to write the headline "[insert team here] Breaks Wind". True dat. That would be as monumentally bad as Major League Soccer (not) originally naming the Kansas City franchise the "Wiz." In the first year of the Miami Heat, when they defeated the Golden State Warriors, one S.F. Chronicle writer couldn't resist references to Buffalo Springfield's "For What It's Worth": What a field day for the Heat 10,000 people in their seats Singing songs and carrying signs Mostly saying, "Hooray for our side!"
posted by L.N. Smithee at 01:05 PM on July 31
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