April 24, 2008

This is my #1 draft pick... : Well maybe a little lower than first. Size, strength, aggressiveness, quickness. With a little help on his technique, he could be an excellent offensive lineman.

read story | posted by canstusdis to Football at 10:11 PM CDT (24 comments total)

And the trolls began circling. Some will mention that the art of Sumo is sacred in Japanese culture and that its participants are not only respected but revered. Others will pick nits that this has no business being posted to Football. Others will call you a racist. Finally, others will offer coaching tips on agility and blocking techinques. The latter might be amusing, but you asked for the rest.

posted by Tinman at 2:09 AM CDT on April 25

Wasn't that guy an offensive lineman on "The Replacements"?

posted by dyams at 7:32 AM CDT on April 25

This would be great in a Locker Room link dump. Not sure it's FPP-worthy, particularly with the FPP as written.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 8:05 AM CDT on April 25

Dude holds too much.

posted by THX-1138 at 11:16 AM CDT on April 25

I loved the YouTube comments on a related video:

MONGOLIA RULZ

Do you guys even have the INternet?

Fuck u we have better girls than your bitches

R U serious? I live in Sweden ffs

posted by BitterOldPunk at 1:13 PM CDT on April 25

How effective would he be without all the other players wearing a mawashi?

posted by HATER 187 at 1:45 PM CDT on April 25

Another thing this thread is overlooking is that Akinori has a pretty interesting story. One of the few foreign born Yokozunas (he is Mongolian) he was suspended for bowing out of a tournament with some questionable injuries. He was also disqualified during a bout for pulling his opponents hair (disqualifications are unheard of in sumo)

posted by HATER 187 at 1:51 PM CDT on April 25

How effective would he be without all the other players wearing a mawashi?

Thanks. Now I have to go to the Maxim website to get the above visual out of my head.

posted by THX-1138 at 2:16 PM CDT on April 25

Broncos should draft him. My kingdom for a left tackle to protect Cutler's blind side.

posted by drumdance at 3:20 PM CDT on April 25

Funny. I look just like a white version of those guys, sans t-back. Yet my speed and agility are nothing close to that. I just checked. WTF?

posted by smithnyiu at 3:37 PM CDT on April 25

Thanks, Tinman, for your showing such high regard for other people's posts, and your uncanny psychic abilities.

Lighten up...

posted by canstusdis at 6:08 PM CDT on April 25

This is my #1 draft pick... : Well maybe a little lower than first. Size, strength, aggressiveness, quickness. With a little help on his technique, he could be an excellent offensive lineman.

Chuck Norris?

posted by BoKnows at 6:16 PM CDT on April 25

all I can say about this one is............... OOOOOOOH Ma GOOOOOOODNESS, I believe I have seen too much. Could you imagine really football playing in one of those thongs. I don't think it would be nice. Maybe we could put Jeter in one of those though.

posted by brandy at 7:37 PM CDT on April 25

His reaction time is amazing. I'd like to see Sport Science do tests to compare his reflex against a top Defensive Tackle. Or maybe against a Top Fuel Driver?

posted by BoKnows at 8:16 PM CDT on April 25

You know what? He's a great Yokozuna, and that video shows it, because he deals with every possible line of attack from challengers, in very different ways. I've seen sumo before, but to grasp the techniques, it's really suited to that kind of tight highlight reel.

You can extrapolate from that to explain why linemen end up high in the draft. And yeah, I'd like to see a comparison of abilities with the NFL.

posted by etagloh at 12:45 AM CDT on April 26

While I think a comparison is a cool idea, to me this an apples and oranges kind of thing. In Sumo you can grab the mawashi plus you can also open palm stike. I believe both of these practices are frowned upon in the NFL. As far as the bodies colliding at high speed and who has the advantage, I would have to think a Yokozuna would. They start further apart in Sumo and also have a better starting position.

posted by HATER 187 at 1:27 AM CDT on April 26

Thanks, Tinman, for your showing such high regard for other people's posts, and your uncanny psychic abilities.

I didn't see it as a criticism of your specific post but rather as a reference to the several threads that have been overrun by trolls of late.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 6:32 AM CDT on April 26

...to me this an apples and oranges kind of thing

You are exactly right Hater, there really is no comparison. In Sumo you are restricted by the small size of the ring, opponents are not able to sidestep and execute spin moves, and the mawashi is a favorite target for one to hold. Most importantly, the best "sekitori" have great lower body strength, and particularly hip flexibility. Professional football players tend to work the upper body harder than the lower (except to build leg drive, which is not all that important in Sumo), and hip flexibility is not really considered an asset. The closest sport to Sumo is classic Japanese Judo. The techniques involved are identical.

posted by Howard_T at 11:58 AM CDT on April 26

...to me this an apples and oranges kind of thing

I'm not suggesting that his skills would be applicable to the NFL. I'm more interested in how fast he reacts to a whistle or command vs. the ability of an NFL player's reaction of the ball snap.

posted by BoKnows at 12:43 PM CDT on April 26

there's really is no comparison.

I beg to differ:

The size of the dohyo (ring) is 4.55 meters or just under 5 yards. Plenty of room to sidestep and execute spin moves. These moves by the way are used by many sekitori (wrestlers).

The mawashi (thong) is the ONLY target for one to hold, but certainly not the only way to defeat your opponent. I'm sure if defensive lineman wore only mawashi, offensive lineman would find a way to get a holding penalty.

Did you watch the video? Clearly this yokozuna (grand champion) has exceptional upper body strength as do many in the upper ranks of sumo. He's not ripped, but he doesn't lift weights. Think what a strength and conditioning coach could do with him.

hip flexibility is not really considered an asset.
Your kidding, right? Look at the negatives for Anthony Collins or Geoff Schwartz.

I say take off the mawashi and give this guy some pads.

posted by canstusdis at 7:58 PM CDT on April 26

Here's Asashoryu's draft stats. He's 6' tall and weighs 324 lbs. Needs to work on his tsukidashi oshidashi and oshitaoshi techniques if he wants to get into the NFL.

posted by canstusdis at 8:46 PM CDT on April 26

Mel Kiper thinks he's got a nasty streak, technically sound, and great explosion off the snap, but doesn't feel he can pull and get around the edge. Todd McShay, on the other hand, feels he's a liability on pass pro.

Overall, a good late day pick for someone willing to let him develop, put him in an NFL-weight room, and teach him some pass protection technique.

posted by Bonkers at 8:43 PM CDT on April 27

canstusdis

that sumo.goo site is pretty sweet. thanks for the links

posted by HATER 187 at 11:06 PM CDT on April 27

hater,

Good to see you still Hater'n.

I got hooked on Sumo while living in Hawaii. (Thanks, US Army) Akebono was a Yokozuna back then, and 6 times a year they'd show the 15 day tournaments on local TV. Even got a chance to see an exibition tournament In Hawaii in '92. I've always been intrigued by the agility and quickness of these huge guys.

posted by canstusdis at 8:30 PM CDT on April 29

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