November 28, 2005

Man Runs Onto NFL Field to Spread Mother's Ashes: "I know that the last handful of ashes I had are laying on the field, and will never be taken away. She'll always be part of Lincoln Financial Field and of the Eagles."

"It's bizarre, but we have a zero tolerance for people who run on the field," Police Inspector William Colarulo said. "We especially have a zero tolerance for people who run onto the field and dump an unknown substance in a stadium full of people."

posted by justgary to football at 11:12 PM - 39 comments

someone did this during a yankees/mariners game at safeco this year. i'm all for honoring the dead and such, but that just ain't right.

posted by goddam at 11:37 PM on November 28, 2005

Because it was the Yankees? Or in general?

posted by owlhouse at 12:02 AM on November 29, 2005

Somehow being dumped onto Lincoln Financial Field just doesn't have the same ring as fenway park, yankee stadium, or veterans stadium. Extra points for using the correct (full) name, though.

posted by justgary at 12:02 AM on November 29, 2005

Seems to be a market for Creative Scattering Options. I personally think that Fireworks is the way to go. Perhaps someone needs to start a sports related spreading service?

posted by terry at 12:07 AM on November 29, 2005

I remember reading a while back that big football clubs like Tottenham in England will agree to scattering ashes quietly, usually during the week, if a family requested it. Naturally, they don't publicise it. If more clubs offered this, I guess, fans wouldn't feel the urge to run onto the field during games. Or that could be the point, unfortunately.

posted by owlhouse at 04:09 AM on November 29, 2005

Because it was the Yankees? Or in general? uh, in general. I remember reading a while back that big football clubs like Tottenham in England will agree to scattering ashes quietly that idea, i do like.

posted by goddam at 05:19 AM on November 29, 2005

Wasn't there something in the news recently about Everton saying they weren't going to do it anymore? I'm too lazy to look for the story.

posted by JJ at 05:21 AM on November 29, 2005

OK - maybe not that lazy: "Ashes are not scattered on the pitch but buried at pitch side in a very peaceful and respectful ceremony. When we were hoping to move to the Kings Dock we made it clear that these would not be abandoned. At any stadium we propose to move to provision will be made for the remains to be relocated. In this instance, there is no reason why we should not accept these ashes.We are in the process of going through the consideration process at the moment." [Statement from Everton]

posted by JJ at 05:28 AM on November 29, 2005

Good thing mom wasn't a Flyers fan.

posted by rcade at 05:53 AM on November 29, 2005

Who dumped the ashes Lincoln financial Field is home to the philedelphia Eagles

posted by Dav at 06:42 AM on November 29, 2005

I think we all got that, Dav; it's that reading comp thing. I wonder how many players are feeling a wee bit taken aback at playing amidst human remains, or how many people question this practice of scattering ashes here there and everywhere. Both of my parents were cremated, but I never felt it was my god-given right to dump Mom and Dad all over the landscape. Mom and Dad are dead and don't care, and other people are living there.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 07:25 AM on November 29, 2005

I think it's an insane gesture, but to be respected. I fail to see how it really harms anyone - but this doofus may have wanted to try the phone call route first. Hey, if you want real fan loyalty, isn't this sort of the extreme side of that bargain? Plus it makes one of those interesting 'hey-Uncle-Dave-tell-that-story-about-how-you-got-arrested-burying-Grandma' holiday gatherings. "Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364..."

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 08:21 AM on November 29, 2005

Damnit, Weedy.

posted by yerfatma at 09:41 AM on November 29, 2005

Nice work weedy, people look at me funny when I laugh out loud at work...

posted by tron7 at 10:12 AM on November 29, 2005

I never felt it was my god-given right to dump Mom and Dad all over the landscape. I love that line. Pretty much sums most of this up. Seriously, can you imagine if this type of thing was allowed and accepted? There'd be ashes flying all over places like Yankee Stadium and Fenway Park. It would be kind of disgusting playing football amidst the burnt remains of several dozen dead people.

posted by dyams at 10:19 AM on November 29, 2005

When my local team Swansea City moved to a new stadium at the start of the season, they found so many urns under the pitch that they made an appeal for the family members to come and collect their dead relatives. I guess it must be quite common. Dunno how mega clubs like Man U and Liverpool cope, they must get hundreds of requests a year.

posted by afx237vi at 10:52 AM on November 29, 2005

I had planned to have my ashes spread in my favorite place, but Red Lobster said no.

posted by wfrazerjr at 10:53 AM on November 29, 2005

It would be kind of disgusting playing football amidst the burnt remains of several dozen dead people. I don't know what kind of pansy sport you play, but when I play football, that's pretty much the way it goes. You get used to it.

posted by cl at 11:17 AM on November 29, 2005

I have no problem with the gesture. He did break the law by his actions. He will have his day in court, he will pay a fine and life will go on. This does not appear to be a trend in the USA. And I agree that it will make a lifetime story for the boy's devotion to his mother. Funny side note, player might be offended by playing on a field of ashes from the dead. How is that any different from living in an enviroment of dust, dust that is over 90% dead skin, not much difference in my opinion.

posted by panteeze at 01:06 PM on November 29, 2005

Where the heck you living, Panteeze? There is a 90% chance that you need to move, in my opinion!

posted by Termite at 02:14 PM on November 29, 2005

The guys an idiot, laughing on TV like he did nothing wrong. I was at the game (I missed the actual incident) and certainly wouldnt have felt safe seeing a guy running about spewing powder of some kind. What if there was a panic? What if Jeremiah Trotter took the guys head off? I doubt the Eagles would have allowed him to be buried in the damn parking lot after that stupid stunt. There are much more honorable ways of honoring a dead relative. Besides,they vacuum the field after every game. So now she is floating around on a trash barge near New Jersey.

posted by GoBirds at 02:23 PM on November 29, 2005

So now she is floating around on a trash barge near New Jersey. But really, on a certain level, aren't we all?

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 02:37 PM on November 29, 2005

Damn, that's existential beyond belief.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:37 PM on November 29, 2005

Little smelly too. She is now running through seagulls. RIP ma!

posted by GoBirds at 04:42 PM on November 29, 2005

"Donny was a good bowler, and a good man. He was one of us. He was a man who loved the outdoors... and bowling, and as a surfer he explored the beaches of Southern California, from La Jolla to Leo Carrillo and... up to... Pismo. He died, like so many young men of his generation, he died before his time. In your wisdom, Lord, you took him, as you took so many bright flowering young men at Khe Sanh, at Langdok, at Hill 364..." Donny who loved bowling.

posted by sumokenobi at 05:34 PM on November 29, 2005

mmmm....deep. And original.

posted by GoBirds at 05:36 PM on November 29, 2005

I don't know what kind of pansy sport you play, but when I play football, that's pretty much the way it goes. You get used to it. Didn't you run a crematorium near Atlanta or something? I played a lot of football, and everyone on the field I competed on was very much alive. Maybe you're such a good athlete because you compete against corpses.

posted by dyams at 06:18 PM on November 29, 2005

Of all the stupid things about American sports, and there are a lot, the stupidest has to be the anger of announcers when someone runs on the field. Someone got drunk and committed a minor act of tresspassing. No one gets hurt expect maybe the perpetrator. Some people might even describe these incidents as amusing. Seriously, guys, its not that big a deal. Take the rod out of your butt.

posted by drjimmy11 at 06:22 PM on November 29, 2005

I agree it's not that big of a deal. Do I still have to take the rod out of my butt?

posted by wfrazerjr at 07:21 PM on November 29, 2005

Do I still have to take the rod out of my butt? Beautiful.

posted by dyams at 07:26 PM on November 29, 2005

Mom was that big of a fan, huh,,,,,,,,,,,,O.K.

posted by Tazz1 at 07:41 PM on November 29, 2005

What if Jeremiah Trotter took the guys head off? That should be the punishment of all who breach the sanctity of the football field!

posted by Tazz1 at 07:47 PM on November 29, 2005

Donny was a good bowler etc etc A favourite film of mine, too. But on the same topic of scattering ashes, the Graham Swift novel 'Last Orders' is brilliant and deeply moving. And they made a half decent film of it a couple of years ago. A stellar cast and the only thing Michael Caine has ever been good in.

posted by owlhouse at 02:40 AM on November 30, 2005

I heard that the volume of your ashes is about the same as your volume when you were born (as opposed to being related to your volume when you died) - so you could be a big fat man (or indeed woman) when you die, but have been a little tiny baby, and everyone would be well surprised by how little of the urn your ashes took up. Then, when you weren't looking, they'd bury you under the pitch at Swansea City, and thereby prove (although, by then you'd probably already know) that there is no God. None of that has anything to do with the guy running onto the pitch. He's just a tit.

posted by JJ at 05:52 AM on November 30, 2005

the only thing Michael Caine has ever been good in. Oh behave! He was great as Austin Powers Sr. And the orginal versions of Alfie and Get Carter.

posted by billsaysthis at 03:16 PM on November 30, 2005

How Michael Caine didn't win an Oscar for this Irwin Allen masterpiece still eludes me.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:54 PM on November 30, 2005

I'll accept Alfie and Get Carter, perhaps. But the Austin Powers thing (like everything else he's done since about 1970) is self parody, so doesn't count. Nyah.

posted by owlhouse at 07:15 PM on November 30, 2005

self parody doesn't count? There goes the closest thing I had to a guiding principle in life. Now what?

posted by JJ at 11:01 AM on December 01, 2005

The works of Ayn Raynd.

posted by yerfatma at 11:39 AM on December 01, 2005

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