DrJohnEvans's profile

Homepage URL: http://blackiceblueturf.vsport.tv/
Location: Trawna
Member since: March 11, 2004
Last visit: July 05, 2015

DrJohnEvans has posted 231 links and 1709 comments to SportsFilter and 138 links and 1250 comments to the Locker Room.

Sports Bio

of DrJohnEvans: scholar, gentleman, SpoFite

In a nutshell
The teams
The platform
The commendations
Great moments in sports journalism

Hot Chat update: Thinking about integrating directly with Twitter. In the meantime, I'm on there, if that's your sort of thing.

In a nutshell

Go Jays. Go Sens. Go Furious George GOAT. Go rouge.

(Lose Leafs Lose.)

In our hearts forever: Andy Peters vs. Rob Ray. Okay, so it turns out that you can't watch that video anymore. Damn. In its place, I present to you Aaron Downey vs Brad Norton—the fight that changed the NHL forever.

Sara Orlesky is cute, but Patricia Boal is always in the right place at the right time.

The teams

Coming real soon.

The platform

There are certain inalienable truths in sports, at least according to me.

  1. "Intangibles" do not exist in any meaningful form. If a player brings something "intangible" to his team, that should be reflected in either his individual stats or the team's stats. If not, then his "intangibles" have no value and are not worth discussing.

  2. The NHL's regular season standings will remain inherently unfair until all games are worth the same number of points.

  3. The pitch-out is the best play ever conceived in any sport.

  4. You are not a unique snowflake: everybody here is a fan of a team. Referring to said team in the first-person possessive does nothing to strengthen your argument or make you stand out. Indeed, a comment beginning with "My Brewers" taints the comment's value by informing me that you're arguing through the blue-and-gold-tinted glasses of a Brewers fan, and not objectively as a sports fan. Be proud, but be reasonable.

  5. Winning breeds relaxation, losing breeds frustration. It is infinitely easier to get along with your teammates when you're winning lots of games. Let's stop gazing at .600 teams and talking about how they're all bosom buddies. (Feel free to do the same with .400 teams, though.)

The commendations

"... an integral part of the Sportsfilter.com experience." — NoMich

"DrJohnEvans … should be reading medicine articles if [he is] really a doctor and stop complaining so much." — LROD

"DrJohnEvans [is] only the median if you give extra weight in the direction of users who have posted more than one comment." — mexican

"... DrJohnEvans is now my new friend." — Kleptophoria!

"Where's DrJohnEvans with a cool scoring table when you need him?" — The_Black_Hand

Great moments in sports journalism

Like most discriminating SpoFites, I'm really picky about the commentators and analysts that I have to watch and listen to. Fortunately, there are a few shining stars which pop up on my television. Included with your basic Rogers Cable package up here is a scrappy small-market sports channel, The Score. Their programming's centred around their near-constant highlight/update reels. They're my favourite in terms of sports news and entertainment: they just have fun with the stuff.

Tell it like it is

Sunday afternoons feature The Score on the NFL, which keeps track of the millions of games going on at once. December 19, they were doing their usual mid-afternoon round-up. The game was Minnesota at Detroit:

[highlight reel running]

"Minnesota gets one late in the fourth quarter to go up by seven, but it doesn't matter, because Detroit marches right back to score the major with eight seconds left in the game."

[boxscore screen comes up]

"It's still 28-27 as we're just waiting for the extra point, I'm just watching it now... and THEY MUFFED THE SNAP! They muffed the snap! Amazing. Amazing. Eight seconds left, the touchdown, and they muffed the snap. Okay, hang on, we gotta get you this picture. Amazing. Amazing."

[highlight comes up]

"Okay, here is it. This JUST HAPPENED, folks. Detroit scores to nearly tie it up, and they muff the snap. Amazing. Amazing. Man. Lions suck."

I love good sports journalism.

How to call a Tampa Bay home run

From MLB highlights on The Score Tonight, Summer 2006:
TIM: Fifth inning, Johnny Gomes at the dish. Now he's a model, if you know what I mean, 'cause he does his little thing on the catwalk.

SID: On the catwalk?

TIM: On the catwalk, yeah.

SID: He does his little thing on the catwalk?

TIM: That's correct.

Recent Links

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Two: Another Pick 'Em season is underway, this time with a possible-record-but-I'm-too-lazy-to-look-it-up sixteen players! So it figures that the first week sees three upsets, which means that you probably didn't get many points. Shake it off and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 03:53 PM on June 29 - 20 comments

The 11th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em: It's late June, which means the temperature has just nudged above freezing in Edmonton, which means that the snowbank covering Frank's Sporting Supply And Live Bait Shop has melted JUST enough to dig out the front door, which means that FINALLY Jake Ireland can walk in, pick up a fresh crate of regulation footballs, charge them on his Tim Horton's double-double card, allowing us to FINALLY end this run-on sentence and get the CFL season underway. Take a breath and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 09:40 PM on June 22 - 20 comments

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Final Standings: Hamilton finds a way to make it interesting, but an illegal block on a last-minute punt return means that Calgary hangs on for the big win. No such drama in our little pick 'em, though, as slow and steady always seems to come out on top. Final standings are inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 09:27 PM on December 03 - 4 comments

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition: Big blowouts on the field push the favourites into the big game. But in our little contest, there are no favourites: we have six players within two points of first place. Break out your spreadsheets to calculate your tiebreaker (I have a feeling you'll need it), and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 01:41 PM on November 27 - 14 comments

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Finals Edition: The favourites rule the day as Edmonton and Montreal both move on to their division finals. Montreal wins a trip to Hamilton (snow; rude fans) while Edmonton gets a trip to Calgary (cold; cows). Meanwhile, in our little standings, there are some familiar faces in familiar places. Bundle up and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 04:10 PM on November 19 - 14 comments

Recent Comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Two

Winnipeg by 5
Calgary by 9
B.C. by 21
Toronto by 8

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:52 PM on July 01

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Two

Holy upsets, Batman! Montreal suffers two QB injuries in-game, and Ottawa takes advantage with the comeback win. Calgary needs a time-expiring field goal to come from behind to send Hamilton packing. Edmonton can't get it done in their backyard, losing both the game and QB Mike Reilly as Toronto prevails. And Winnipeg walzes into Regina and wins! (Oh, and Saskatchewan loses star QB Darian Durant for the year. That's bad, right?)

ResultOttawa by 4Calgary by 1Toronto by 15Winnipeg by 4
Margin of Error3 to 51 to 111 to 203 to 5

Three upsets make points tough to come by, but bender's lucky coin leads the way with four points.

bender Calgary Toronto18Winnipeg 44
cixelsyd Calgary Winnipeg333
rumple Calgary Winnipeg533
Howard_T Calgary Winnipeg533
jagsnumberone 1Toronto Winnipeg 33
goddam Calgary 422
Reever Calgary Toronto 22
rcade Calgary Winnipeg 22
tahoemj Calgary Toronto 22
JPR Calgary 422
ic23b Calgary 11
owlhouse Calgary 11
tommytrump Calgary 11
DrJohnEvans Calgary 11
Ying Yang Mafia Toronto 11
argoal Calgary 11
jjzucal 00

Week Two: everyone moves one spot to their left, except for Edmonton which heads home to lick its wounds.


Hamilton @ Winnipeg (Thursday, July 2)
After three years with no playoff appearances, Winnipeg may just be on the verge of contending again, but they'll have to string together a couple in a row before we believe it. Coming off a tough last-minute loss, Hamilton is hoping that the rebuild in the 'Peg isn't quite finished yet.

Calgary @ Montreal (Friday, July 3)
Here are two 0-1 teams which everyone expected to be 1-0. Calgary's the stronger team, but Montreal's no slouch, and they should have QB Jonathan Crompton back after suffering a shoulder bruise last week, which should at least make things interesting.

B.C. @ Ottawa (Saturday, July 4)
The last time Travis Lulay visited Ottawa, he shredded his shoulder and ended his season. I'm no expert, but he's probably hoping for a slightly better outcome now. On the other sideline, do you believe in the Redblacks' sophomore streak?

Toronto @ Saskatchewan (Sunday, July 5)
Toronto hopes that the Trevor Harris Magic continues for another week. Meanwhile, Saskatchewan looks to rebound after a nasty loss last week - with 834-year-old Kevin Glenn taking the snaps.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 03:53 PM on June 29

The 11th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

Montreal by 14
Calgary by 21
Edmonton by 12
Saskatchewan by 3

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:56 PM on June 23

The 11th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

THE PICK 'EM - What we do

Kings and queens, prime ministers, Arctic ice; all these things come and go with the ages. But Canadian football is forever. Well, except in Ottawa, where it's a bit intermittent. And in the States... well, let's not dwell too much on that. In any case, we honour this eternal tradition in two ways: one, making sure we put back the "u" in "honour" when autocorrect takes it away, and two, picking the outcome of every game on the CFL schedule.

THE SEASON - When we do it

The season kicks off this Thursday night and runs for 20 weeks through the summer. There are generally four games per week, mostly running from Thursday to Sunday.

If you're in Canada, you'll find the games on TSN. If you're in the States, the occasional game is available on the NFL Network, and in the past all games appeared on ESPN3, but they don't seem to have released a confirmed broadcast sked yet. And if you're somewhere else, you'll have to resort to SiriusXM on the satellite radio dial (which is a two-way switch with one of the options crossed out).

THE RULES - How we do it

Here's how she works. You pick who you think will win, and by how much. You then get points based on the result:

  • Picked the winner? You get 1 point.
  • Picked the winner, and a spread within the Margin of Error? You get 2 points.
  • Picked the winner, and you nailed the spread right on? You get 3 points.
  • Didn't pick the winner, but nailed the spread right on? You get 1 point.

What's the Margin of Error?

It's a window around the spread that's defined as

spread - round(0.3 * spread) <= Margin of Error <= spread + round(0.3 * spread)

So you can get rewarded for being close to the spread even if you're not spot-on. The bigger the spread, the bigger the margin of error, so you don't have to be as accurate when predicting a blowout as you would when predicting a close game. Here are some examples:

Actual Spread Margin Starts at Margin Ends at

So if you picked Toronto by 15, here's how you'd fare given certain outcomes:

OutcomeYour score
Toronto by 202 points (winner + spread within MoE)
Toronto by 101 point (winner only)
Toronto by 153 points (winner + nailed spread)
Hamilton by 151 point (nailed spread only)
Hamilton by 430 points (and deservedly so)

Any questions?

THE GAMES, WEEK ONE - Where we start

In lieu of attempting to sum up each team's status in a single sentence, for this opening week I'm just linking to season preview pages for each of 'em.

All times are EDT.

Ottawa Redblacks (Preview) @ Montreal Alouettes (Preview) - Thursday, June 25, 7:30pm

Hamilton Tiger-Cats (Preview) @ Calgary Stampeders (Preview) - Friday, June 26, 9:00pm

Edmonton Eskimos (Preview) "@" Toronto Argonauts (Preview) - Saturday, June 27, 5:00pm - NOTE: GAME NOT ACTUALLY IN TORONTO BUT IN NORTHERN ALBERTA I KNOW WTF

Winnipeg Blue Bombers (Preview) @ Saskatchewan Roughriders (Preview) - Saturday, June 27, 8:00pm

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:41 PM on June 22

NFL Moves PAT Kicks Back to 15-Yard Line

The CFL made a similar rule change earlier this year, pushing back points-after by 20 yards. But what's interesting (and to grum's point) is that they've pushed UP two-point conversions by two yards. The goal was to reduce the single-point success rate and encourage more two-point conversions.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:54 PM on May 19

The gym on the Titanic, and other early 19th century ocean liners.

Fun! Thanks for the link.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 07:32 PM on March 22

Is Charlie Brown the Worst Manager Ever?

This is great.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:08 AM on March 04

New MLB Commissioner: We May Ban Defensive Shifts

Dave Cameron did a pretty good job of summarizing the entire Internet's reaction to this: shifts aren't to blame for the drop in offence.

The primary culprit is the strike zone's out-of-control growth.

It's incredibly frustrating that new rules are being spitballed, when all the solutions to the game's problems already exist in the rulebook. Call the zone correctly, enforce the 12-second pitch rule without any stupid clocks, and you're golden.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:42 PM on January 27

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Final Standings

Calgary jumps out to a big early lead, but Hamilton throws up a late first-half TD to make things interesting. Calgary then busts out the Rich Stubler bend-but-don't-break defence, stifling Hamilton in the red zone as they kick 3 field goals to make it close. With the fourth-quarter clock at 1:12 and ticking down, Calgary punts to Brandon Banks, who runs a spectacular 90 yards for the go-ahead touchdown—which is heartbreakingly called back on an illegal block. Calgary makes the most of it and hangs on for the Grey Cup win.

HAM @ CGYMVP BonusO/U Bonus
ResultCalgary by 4MitchellUnder
Margin of Error3 to 5

Points were tough to come by, but ic23b capitalizes on his early lead, and only needs two points to take the crown, no tiebreaker needed. Congratulations!

And in the other corner, with back-to-back Costanzas to his name, it's bender! Well (?) done.

SpoFiteHAM @ CGYSMVPO/UPointsTotal Points
ic23bCalgary Mitchell 29
Howard_TCalgary Mitchell 28
DrJohnEvansCalgary Mitchell 28
cixelsydCalgary 18
JPRCalgary4 Mitchell 48
ReeverCalgary 17
argoalCalgary Mitchell 27
owlhouseCalgary MitchellUnder37
goddamCalgary Mitchell 26
tommytrump 04
grum@workCalgary 13
bender Under11

Thanks again to each and every one of you for playing along. See y'all in June!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:27 PM on December 03

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Calgary by 18
590 yards

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:36 PM on November 28

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Also! Want to watch the game? Here's how.

In short: TSN in Canada, ESPN2 in the States, streaming on TSN GO.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:43 PM on November 27

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Big second quarters from the home teams put both games out of reach early. Hamilton rides its special teams to a convincing win over Montreal, and Calgary rides the arm of Bo Levi Mitchell, who throws for 4 TDs to send the Esks packing.

In bonus action, the aforementioned Bo Levi edges Jonathan Crompton for the yardage crown, while Edmonton's three sacks carry the day (if not the win).

ResultHamilton by 16Calgary by 25MitchellEdmonton
Margin of Error11 to 2118 to 33

The on-field games may have been blowouts, but here in the Pick 'Em we're all about keeping it close. A tie for first, and a three-way tie for third. Nothing's been settled yet!

SpoFiteMTL @ HAMSEDM @ CGYSOWC BonusDWC BonusPointsTotal Points
cixelsydHamilton13Calgary 37
ic23bHamilton Calgary Mitchell 37
DrJohnEvansHamilton Calgary Mitchell 36
Howard_THamilton17Calgary18 46
ReeverHamilton11Calgary MitchellEdmonton56
argoalHamilton 15
goddam Edmonton14
owlhouse Edmonton14
JPRHamilton Calgary 24
tommytrumpHamilton17Calgary 14
rcade 03
grum@work Calgary 12
bender 00

And here we go!


Hamilton Tiger-Cats (9-9) @ Calgary Stampeders (15-3) (Sunday, November 30)

I could talk about a lot of things in previewing this game. I could talk about Calgary's deep offence or Hamilton's tough defence. I could talk about Calgary's sterling record in a tough division despite suffering through serious injuries, or Hamilton battling back from a tough start to just barely make the playoffs. But for me, this game comes down to one thing: two great young quarterbacks, Bo Levi Mitchell and Zach Collaros, getting a chance to ply their trade indoors, in the biggest game of the year.

CFL.ca Grey Cup Preview »

MVP Bonus

Pick the MVP of the Grey Cup.


The points-scored O/U for the Grey Cup is currently set at 52.5. Will the total points scored be over or under that total?


Pick the total yardage thrown by all quarterbacks in the Grey Cup. This is worth no points and will be used only in case of a tie.

Example pick: Hamilton by 21, Cornish, Under, 500.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:41 PM on November 27

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Finals Edition

Hamilton by 10 and hoping I'm wrong
Calgary by 14

posted by DrJohnEvans at 11:31 AM on November 23

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Finals Edition

So much for Western dominance: Montreal piles on the points to send B.C. packing. Things are a bit tighter in Edmonton, but despite not scoring an offensive touchdown, the Esks find an early lead and never look back.

Special teams wins the day in Edmonton, as 12 of the Eskimos' 18 points come off the boot of Hugh O'Neill. And despite Saskatchewan's attempts to keep scoring low, Montreal's blowout ensure that we hit the over - although only by 5 points!

BC @ MTLSSK @ EDMKicking BonusLVP Bonus
ResultMontreal by 33Edmonton by 8O'NeillOver
Margin of Error23 to 436 to 10

Some familiar faces in familiar positions here: argoal, cixelsyd... bender.

SpoFiteBC @ MTLSSSK @ EDMSKickingLVPPointsTotal Points
cixelsydMontreal Edmonton9 Over44
ic23bMontreal Edmonton O'NeillOver44
argoalMontreal Edmonton8 44
DrJohnEvansMontreal Edmonton7 33
goddamMontreal Edmonton Over33
owlhouseMontreal Edmonton Over33
rcadeMontreal Edmonton Over33
Howard_TMontreal Edmonton 22
JPRMontreal Edmonton 22
grum@workMontreal 11
tommytrumpMontreal 11
ReeverMontreal 11
bender 00

It's all going according to form as we move on to the:


Montreal Alouettes (9-9) @ Hamilton Tiger-Cats (9-9) (Sunday, November 23)

Here's an even match-up if ever there was one. With the season series tied, and Hamilton breaking the tie on point differential, these two teams have been neck and neck for the past three months. It'll come down to Hamilton's energetic young QB Zach Collaros against Montreal's strong defence. But Hamilton's defence is not so shoddy either, allowing only one point more than Montreal's this season. And on the other hand, Montreal just dropped seven touchdowns in their semi. So this would be a good opportunity to borrow bender's flipping coin.

CFL.ca Eastern Final Preview »

Edmonton Eskimos (12-6) @ Calgary Stampeders (15-3) (Sunday, November 23)

Just like they drew it up: the best offence in the league against the stingiest defence in the league. Calgary will bring QB Bo Levi Mitchell and RB Jon Cornish against the Eskimos' strong and healthy d-line. When healthy, Calgary's been the class of the West for the entire year, but we are in November now, and weather can have a huge impact on offense. Keep an eye on that forecast.

CFL.ca Western Final Preview »

Offence Wins Championships Bonus

Pick the quarterback who will throw for the highest yardage on Sunday.

2014 Passing Stats »

Defence Wins Championships Bonus

Pick the team whose defence will register the most sacks on Sunday.

Example pick: Montreal by 21, Edmonton by 14, Crompton, Calgary.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 04:11 PM on November 19

CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, Semi-Finals Edition

Montreal by 7
Edmonton by 7

posted by DrJohnEvans at 11:01 AM on November 13