DrJohnEvans's profile

DrJohnEvans
1042
Homepage URL: http://blackiceblueturf.vsport.tv/
Location: Trawna
Member since: March 11, 2004
Last visit: April 18, 2014

DrJohnEvans has posted 204 links and 1641 comments to SportsFilter and 138 links and 1250 comments to the Locker Room.

Sports Bio

of DrJohnEvans: scholar, gentleman, SpoFite

In a nutshell
The teams
The platform
The commendations
Great moments in sports journalism


Hot Chat update: Thinking about integrating directly with Twitter. In the meantime, I'm on there, if that's your sort of thing.


In a nutshell

Go Jays. Go Sens. Go Furious George GOAT. Go rouge.

(Lose Leafs Lose.)

In our hearts forever: Andy Peters vs. Rob Ray. Okay, so it turns out that you can't watch that video anymore. Damn. In its place, I present to you Aaron Downey vs Brad Norton—the fight that changed the NHL forever.

Sara Orlesky is cute, but Patricia Boal is always in the right place at the right time.


The teams


Coming real soon.


The platform


There are certain inalienable truths in sports, at least according to me.

  1. "Intangibles" do not exist in any meaningful form. If a player brings something "intangible" to his team, that should be reflected in either his individual stats or the team's stats. If not, then his "intangibles" have no value and are not worth discussing.

  2. The NHL's regular season standings will remain inherently unfair until all games are worth the same number of points.

  3. The pitch-out is the best play ever conceived in any sport.

  4. You are not a unique snowflake: everybody here is a fan of a team. Referring to said team in the first-person possessive does nothing to strengthen your argument or make you stand out. Indeed, a comment beginning with "My Brewers" taints the comment's value by informing me that you're arguing through the blue-and-gold-tinted glasses of a Brewers fan, and not objectively as a sports fan. Be proud, but be reasonable.

  5. Winning breeds relaxation, losing breeds frustration. It is infinitely easier to get along with your teammates when you're winning lots of games. Let's stop gazing at .600 teams and talking about how they're all bosom buddies. (Feel free to do the same with .400 teams, though.)


The commendations

"... an integral part of the Sportsfilter.com experience." — NoMich

"DrJohnEvans … should be reading medicine articles if [he is] really a doctor and stop complaining so much." — LROD

"DrJohnEvans [is] only the median if you give extra weight in the direction of users who have posted more than one comment." — mexican

"... DrJohnEvans is now my new friend." — Kleptophoria!

"Where's DrJohnEvans with a cool scoring table when you need him?" — The_Black_Hand


Great moments in sports journalism

Like most discriminating SpoFites, I'm really picky about the commentators and analysts that I have to watch and listen to. Fortunately, there are a few shining stars which pop up on my television. Included with your basic Rogers Cable package up here is a scrappy small-market sports channel, The Score. Their programming's centred around their near-constant highlight/update reels. They're my favourite in terms of sports news and entertainment: they just have fun with the stuff.

Tell it like it is

Sunday afternoons feature The Score on the NFL, which keeps track of the millions of games going on at once. December 19, they were doing their usual mid-afternoon round-up. The game was Minnesota at Detroit:

[highlight reel running]

"Minnesota gets one late in the fourth quarter to go up by seven, but it doesn't matter, because Detroit marches right back to score the major with eight seconds left in the game."

[boxscore screen comes up]

"It's still 28-27 as we're just waiting for the extra point, I'm just watching it now... and THEY MUFFED THE SNAP! They muffed the snap! Amazing. Amazing. Eight seconds left, the touchdown, and they muffed the snap. Okay, hang on, we gotta get you this picture. Amazing. Amazing."

[highlight comes up]

"Okay, here is it. This JUST HAPPENED, folks. Detroit scores to nearly tie it up, and they muff the snap. Amazing. Amazing. Man. Lions suck."

I love good sports journalism.

How to call a Tampa Bay home run

From MLB highlights on The Score Tonight, Summer 2006:
TIM: Fifth inning, Johnny Gomes at the dish. Now he's a model, if you know what I mean, 'cause he does his little thing on the catwalk.

SID: On the catwalk?

TIM: On the catwalk, yeah.

SID: He does his little thing on the catwalk?

TIM: That's correct.






Recent Links

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Final Standings: Saskatchewan wins big, which means it comes down to the wire in our standings. Hope you did your punting research before making your tiebreaker pick, because our winner sure did.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 08:18 PM on November 27 - 4 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition: Both road teams win the day in the division finals, and our match-up is set. Hamilton journeys to Regina to take on the watermelon-clad hordes of Rider Nation. You, on the other hand, have the option of staying inside and toasty warm this Sunday, so why not light a fire, find your fuzzy socks, and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 08:48 PM on November 20 - 14 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Finals Edition: It's all favourites, all the time. Saskatchewan and Hamilton advance to their respective finals. This week we have two great quarterbacks in a dome, and two great running backs in the snow. Layer up and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 09:15 PM on November 13 - 14 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Final Edition: It's the exact midpoint between Canadian Thanksgiving and Ron Lancaster Day, which mean it's time for playoff football! If you're still stinging over your Costanza-worthy performance in the regular season, or kicking yourself for not signing up back in June, kick no more: it's a clean slate and all are welcome. Grab your metresticks and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 05:50 PM on November 07 - 13 comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Final Standings: Furious activity in our standings as many of our contenders nail spreads in hopes of unseating cixelsyd. But were they successful?

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 12:46 PM on November 04 - 7 comments

Recent Comments

Expanded Replay Makes Debut in Baseball

It was a bit disheartening to see the gaming of the challenge system so quickly on display in yesterday's games, stuff like "turning the ump".

I'm all for replay but I think an NHL-style fifth-umpire system would be better for everyone.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:34 PM on April 01

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Final Standings

Well, Hamilton put up some points, but in the end they were just plain overwhelmed by the Prairie boys. Saskatchewan has a record-setting 24 points in the second quarter to make it all but inevitable, aided largely by Kory Sheets' MVP-calibre 197 yards on the ground.

HAM @ SSKMVP BonusO/UTiebreaker
ResultSaskatchewan by 22SheetsOver37.6
Margin of Error15 to 29

Three-way tie at the top so we go to tiebreaker, and it's a familiar name ending up on top. cixelsyd has a perfect week AND hits the tiebreaker to sweep all 2013 SpoFi CFL Pick 'Ems. Double congratulations to cixelsyd!

At the other end, tommytrump's pick of Hamilton by 21 nets very few points indeed, resulting in a well-deserved Costanza. Congratulations!

SpoFiteHAM @ SSKSMVPO/UTiebreaker Diff.PointsTotal Points
cixelsydSaskatchewan17SheetsOver1.448
ic23bSaskatchewan21 Over3.438
Ying Yang MafiaSaskatchewan Over5.428
JPR Over4.416
DrJohnEvansSaskatchewan Sheets 5.926
bender Over4.315
goddamSaskatchewan Over4.425
ReeverSaskatchewan 10.414
argoalSaskatchewan 2.213
jjzucal Over6.413
tommytrump Over10.412

Thanks to all for a fantastic 2013, and we'll see you next June on the road to Vancouver!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:18 PM on November 27

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Saskatchewan by 14
Sheets
Under
43.5

posted by DrJohnEvans at 06:20 PM on November 24

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Oh right, the too many men penalty. That was classic.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:22 AM on November 21

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Toronto comes out strong, but falls apart in the second half as Hamilton books their trip to Regina. Meanwhile, the Team of Destiny runs roughshod over the Stamps, and the 'Riders get to play a Grey Cup at home.

In hot bonus action, Saskatchewan nets 536 yards of combined offence to lead the way. And there were exactly seven fumbles in the two division finals, so the unders squeak out a point.

HAM @ TORSSK @ CGYOWC BonusTurnovers Bonus
ResultHamilton by 12Saskatchewan by 22536Under
Margin of Error8 to 1615 to 29

YYM misses one game but hits both bonus questions to jump into first place.

SpoFiteHAM @ TORSSSK @ CGYSOWC BonusTurnoversPointsTotal Points
Ying Yang Mafia Saskatchewan SaskatchewanUnder36
ic23bHamilton 15
JPRHamilton Under35
benderHamilton Saskatchewan 24
cixelsydHamilton 14
DrJohnEvans Saskatchewan 14
goddamHamilton Saskatchewan 23
Reever Saskatchewan 13
argoal Under12
jjzucal 02
tommytrump 01

Here we go!

THE 101st GREY CUP

Hamilton Tiger-Cats (10-8) @ Saskatchewan Roughriders (11-7) (Sunday, November 24)

Hamilton, kicked out of their home stadium and forced to wander in the wilderness, had a wildly inconsistent year, but have managed to pull it together at the right time to charge into the Grey Cup. Saskatchewan, on the other hand, set their sights on this game the moment it was awarded: Grey Cup games at home don't come around all too often, and you'd better be ready for 'em. With the exception of an injury-sparked slump in the September heat, Saskatchewan has been gunning hard for this all year.

TSN.ca Grey Cup Preview

MVP Bonus

Pick the MVP of the Grey Cup game.

Over/Under

The points-scored O/U is currently set at 53.5. Will the number of points scored be over or under that mark?

Tiebreaker Bonus

Pick the average yardage for all punts in the Grey Cup game. This is a tiebreaker only and will not be worth any points. Remember, it's Saskatchewan in late November.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:48 PM on November 20

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Finals Edition

Toronto by 8
Saskatchewan by 10
Toronto
Over

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:16 PM on November 13

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Finals Edition

Montreal guts it out in the bitter Guelph winds, but Hamilton wins it in overtime to make it to the East final. B.C. comes on strong in Regina, but the Roughriders rides a strong fourth quarter to seal the deal.

MTL @ HAMBC @ SSKKicking TeethPosse
ResultHamilton by 3Saskatchewan by 4MiloUnder
Margin of Error2 to 43 to 5

Milo kicks a solid seventeen points to easily take the bonus and make the difference in the standings.

SpoFiteCGY @ EDMSTOR @ WPGSBC @ SSKHAM @ MTLPointsTotal Points
ic23bHamilton2Saskatchewan Milo 54
cixelsyd Saskatchewan3Milo 33
DrJohnEvansHamilton Saskatchewan Under33
JPRHamilton Saskatchewan Under33
Ying Yang MafiaHamilton Saskatchewan Milo 33
bender MiloUnder22
jjzucalHamilton Saskatchewan 22
Reever 3 4 22
argoal Under11
goddam Saskatchewan 11
tommytrump Saskatchewan 11

The favourites win out the semis, and ride into town as the underdogs.

DIVISION FINALS

Hamilton Tiger-Cats (10-8) @ Toronto Argonauts (11-7) (Sunday, November 10)

Lookit this! Henry Burris and Ricky Ray, so long the faces of the Battle of Alberta, are now representing in the Battle of Ontario. Ray's solid year was interrupted by injury, but returned to put up career highs in his last game of the season. Burris led the league in passing yardage, but seemed to struggle in last week's semi. The Argos have lost star RB Chad Kackert to ankle surgery, but Jerious Norwood is ready to fill in once again. Make no mistake: under the closed SkyDome, this one will be all about the offence.

TSN.ca Eastern Final Preview

Saskatchewan Roughriders (11-7) @ Calgary Stampeders (14-4) (Sunday, November 10)

Both these teams feature league-leading running backs: Kory Sheets for the 'Riders and Jon Cornish for the Stamps. And given that the forecast calls for fog (?) and a high of -14 Celsius (!), they'll get plenty of work in. As for the passing game: veteran Kevin Glenn is trying to finally get over the Grey Cup hump, while it may just be the legs and not arm of Darian Durant that take the 'Riders back home.

TSN.ca Western Final Preview

Offence Wins Championships Bonus

Pick the team whose offence will have the greatest combined yardage in Sunday's games.

Turnovers Kill Ya Bonus

Last week there were 7 fumbles in the semi-final games. Given the weather and the teams involved, I'm setting the over/under for this week at 7.5. Pick whether the total number of fumbles this Sunday will be OVER or UNDER that number. All fumbles count, regardless of who recovered the ball.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:15 PM on November 13

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Final Edition

Five minutes into the third quarter and HAM boots a FG to make it 3-2. The over is not looking good today.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:46 PM on November 10

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Final Edition

Hamilton by 10
Saskatchewan by 11
Luuuuuuuca Congi
Big ol' under

posted by DrJohnEvans at 04:55 PM on November 09

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Final Edition

Montreal Alouettes (8-10) @ Hamilton Tiger-Cats (10-8) (Sunday, November 10)

This is a surprisingly intriguing match-up: each of these two teams has had moments of brilliance followed by moments of horror. Montreal has suffered through season-changing injuries, but those injuries have also allowed young stars like QB Troy Smith to shine. Hamilton's veteran corps have struggled to maintain any sort of consistency, grinding out tough games one week and dropping easy matches the next. The record and home field (albeit in Guelph) give Hamilton the edge on paper, but I don't think anybody really knows what this Montreal team is capable of.

TSN.ca Eastern Semi-Final Preview

B.C. Lions (11-7) @ Saskatchewan Roughriders (11-7) (Sunday, November 10)

This is the semi that's been destined to happen since bye week. Saskatchewan got off to a hot start and cooled down, B.C. tripped out of the gate but caught up. The Roughriders have been grooming themselves for a Grey Cup run this year, while the Lions have been working through patchwork lineups and quarterback controversies. Yet here they are, with matching records, meeting in the semi-final. Saskatchewan's got a clear edge with home field and RB Kory Sheets healthy again, but B.C. isn't going down without a fight.

TSN.ca Western Semi-Final Preview

Kick 'Em In The Teeth Bonus

Pick the kicker who will score the most points this weekend. That includes place-kick field goals, drop-kick field goals, PATs, singles, and fake field goals thrown for touchdowns.

2013 Kicking Stats

Las Vegas Posse Memorial Bonus

The combined over/under on total points scored for both games is 105.5. Will the actual number of points scored this weekend be OVER or UNDER that total?

Example pick: Montreal by 21, B.C. by 14, McCallum, Over.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 05:51 PM on November 07

CFL Pick 'Em, Final Standings

Montreal's A-team scratches out a victory against Toronto's scrubs. Calgary fields some regulars but comes up short in Vancouver. Hamilton finally puts Winnipeg's season out of its misery, and Edmonton gets it done in Regina.

MTL @ TORCGY @ BCHAM @ WPGEDM @ SSK
ResultMontreal by 3B.C. by 19Hamilton by 30Edmonton by 4
Margin of Error2 to 413 to 2521 to 393 to 5

Ying Yang Mafia and argoal put up a valiant fight, but cixelsyd makes every one of his points count and hangs on for the victory. Congratulations, cixelsyd!

At the other end, jjzucal was hanging in there with the rest of us until the bottom dropped out a couple weeks ago for a well-deserved Costanza. Congratulations!

SpoFiteMTL @ TORSCGY @ BCSHAM @ WPGSEDM @ SSKSPointsTotal Points
cixelsyd B.C. 167
Ying Yang Mafia B.C.19Hamilton 465
argoalMontreal3B.C. Edmonton3664
tommytrump B.C. Edmonton4462
MrFrisby Hamilton 159
Reever Edmonton 159
ic23b Hamilton Edmonton 258
benderMontreal3 Edmonton 456
DrJohnEvans B.C. 156
JPRMontreal B.C. Hamilton 356
goddam 3B.C. Hamilton 355
jjzucal B.C.17 251

Thanks for another fantastic year, folks. Semi-finals are next weekend, so stay tuned for the Playoff Pick 'Em!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 12:47 PM on November 04

CFL Pick 'Em, Week 19

Home teams ahoy!

Toronto by 12
B.C. by 10
Winnipeg by 14
Saskatchewan by 14

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:14 PM on October 31

CFL Pick 'Em, Week 19

Clinches all around! Ricky Ray has the game of the year, throwing for 500 yards to clinch the division title for Toronto. B.C. does what it says on the tin against Edmonton. Hamilton completes the comeback against Montreal to clinch second place and a home playoff date, while Calgary finishes on the right end of a back-and-forth to clinch the West division and relegate Saskatchewan to second place.

WPG @ TOREDM @ BCMTL @ HAMSSK @ CGY
ResultToronto by 15B.C. by 14Hamilton by 3Calgary by 4
Margin of Error11 to 2010 to 182 to 43 to 5

cixelsyd digs deep and scratches out five points to extend his lead to the same margin. Does YYM have a miracle in store?

SpoFiteCGY @ EDMSTOR @ WPGSBC @ SSKSHAM @ MTLSPointsTotal Points
cixelsydToronto13B.C.10 Calgary 566
Ying Yang MafiaToronto16B.C. Calgary 461
argoalToronto B.C. Hamilton3Calgary3758
MrFrisbyToronto11 Hamilton Calgary 458
ReeverToronto B.C. Hamilton 358
tommytrumpToronto13B.C.16 458
ic23bToronto14B.C.12 456
DrJohnEvansToronto B.C.17Hamilton3Calgary 755
JPR B.C. Hamilton Calgary3453
bender B.C.10Hamilton 352
goddamToronto B.C.12 352
jjzucal B.C.11Hamilton 349

It's the last week of the season, and all playoff matchups are set. Get ready for a bunch of 65-49 finals.

WEEK 19

Montreal @ Toronto (Friday, November 1)
Toronto's going to be resting Ricky Ray, Chad Owens, and a host of regulars, and Montreal will likely do the same. But I'll take Zach Collaros over Tanner Marsh in the Bowl of Awesome Names any day.

Calgary @ B.C. (Friday, November 1)
Rumour has it that Calgary isn't even making the trip to Vancouver—they've just shipped a few boxes of stuffed teddy bears wearing red shirts.

Hamilton @ Winnipeg (Saturday, November 2)
In what might be the most meaningful game this week, Winnipeg is playing for jobs next year, at home. If you haven't picked Winnipeg yet this year, now's your chance.

Edmonton @ Saskatchewan (Saturday, November 2)
The only winner in this game will be YOU, because you're smart enough not to go to Taylor Field in November.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 07:10 PM on October 30

CFL Pick 'Em, Week 18

Toronto by 7
B.C. by 17
Hamilton by 3
Calgary by 6

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:43 PM on October 23

CFL Pick 'Em, Week 18

Also, an update on the surprisingly complete U.S. Broadcast Schedule: looks like NBC Sports is carrying the Toronto game, and ESPN3 has the others. If you can't bear to wait for next week's posts.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:31 AM on October 23