DrJohnEvans's profile

Homepage URL: http://blackiceblueturf.vsport.tv/
Location: Trawna
Member since: March 11, 2004
Last visit: July 26, 2017

DrJohnEvans has posted 284 links and 1856 comments to SportsFilter and 138 links and 1250 comments to the Locker Room.

Sports Bio

of DrJohnEvans: scholar, gentleman, SpoFite

In a nutshell
The teams
The platform
The commendations
Great moments in sports journalism

Hot Chat update: Thinking about integrating directly with Twitter. In the meantime, I'm on there, if that's your sort of thing.

In a nutshell

Go Jays. Go Sens. Go Furious George GOAT. Go rouge.

(Lose Leafs Lose.)

In our hearts forever: Andy Peters vs. Rob Ray. Okay, so it turns out that you can't watch that video anymore. Damn. In its place, I present to you Aaron Downey vs Brad Norton—the fight that changed the NHL forever.

Sara Orlesky is cute, but Patricia Boal is always in the right place at the right time.

The teams

Coming real soon.

The platform

There are certain inalienable truths in sports, at least according to me.

  1. "Intangibles" do not exist in any meaningful form. If a player brings something "intangible" to his team, that should be reflected in either his individual stats or the team's stats. If not, then his "intangibles" have no value and are not worth discussing.

  2. The NHL's regular season standings will remain inherently unfair until all games are worth the same number of points.

  3. The pitch-out is the best play ever conceived in any sport.

  4. You are not a unique snowflake: everybody here is a fan of a team. Referring to said team in the first-person possessive does nothing to strengthen your argument or make you stand out. Indeed, a comment beginning with "My Brewers" taints the comment's value by informing me that you're arguing through the blue-and-gold-tinted glasses of a Brewers fan, and not objectively as a sports fan. Be proud, but be reasonable.

  5. Winning breeds relaxation, losing breeds frustration. It is infinitely easier to get along with your teammates when you're winning lots of games. Let's stop gazing at .600 teams and talking about how they're all bosom buddies. (Feel free to do the same with .400 teams, though.)

The commendations

"... an integral part of the Sportsfilter.com experience." — NoMich

"DrJohnEvans … should be reading medicine articles if [he is] really a doctor and stop complaining so much." — LROD

"DrJohnEvans [is] only the median if you give extra weight in the direction of users who have posted more than one comment." — mexican

"... DrJohnEvans is now my new friend." — Kleptophoria!

"Where's DrJohnEvans with a cool scoring table when you need him?" — The_Black_Hand

Great moments in sports journalism

Like most discriminating SpoFites, I'm really picky about the commentators and analysts that I have to watch and listen to. Fortunately, there are a few shining stars which pop up on my television. Included with your basic Rogers Cable package up here is a scrappy small-market sports channel, The Score. Their programming's centred around their near-constant highlight/update reels. They're my favourite in terms of sports news and entertainment: they just have fun with the stuff.

Tell it like it is

Sunday afternoons feature The Score on the NFL, which keeps track of the millions of games going on at once. December 19, they were doing their usual mid-afternoon round-up. The game was Minnesota at Detroit:

[highlight reel running]

"Minnesota gets one late in the fourth quarter to go up by seven, but it doesn't matter, because Detroit marches right back to score the major with eight seconds left in the game."

[boxscore screen comes up]

"It's still 28-27 as we're just waiting for the extra point, I'm just watching it now... and THEY MUFFED THE SNAP! They muffed the snap! Amazing. Amazing. Eight seconds left, the touchdown, and they muffed the snap. Okay, hang on, we gotta get you this picture. Amazing. Amazing."

[highlight comes up]

"Okay, here is it. This JUST HAPPENED, folks. Detroit scores to nearly tie it up, and they muff the snap. Amazing. Amazing. Man. Lions suck."

I love good sports journalism.

How to call a Tampa Bay home run

From MLB highlights on The Score Tonight, Summer 2006:
TIM: Fifth inning, Johnny Gomes at the dish. Now he's a model, if you know what I mean, 'cause he does his little thing on the catwalk.

SID: On the catwalk?

TIM: On the catwalk, yeah.

SID: He does his little thing on the catwalk?

TIM: That's correct.

Recent Links

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Six: The league played one more game than usual, but our little pick 'em scored approximately one million more points than usual. I don't even recognize the standings anymore. Blink twice and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 10:42 AM on July 26 - 8 comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Five: You're not seeing double: Ottawa plays twice this week and we've had three leaders in four weeks. And yes, that's an early Wednesday game on your calendar. Get your vision checked and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 01:01 PM on July 18 - 16 comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Four: In the CFL, scoring is up. In our little pick 'em, scoring is down. The solution is clichéd yet practical: bet big or go home. Widen your spreads and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 01:29 PM on July 12 - 16 comments

What football will look like in the future: Something is terribly wrong.

posted by DrJohnEvans to football at 02:30 PM on July 10 - 3 comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Three: Out of 250 points scored last week, the Argos had only 15 of them. Maybe 2017 isn't so different after all. Check your calendars and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 10:22 PM on July 04 - 13 comments

Recent Comments

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Six

Comebacks all over! Ottawa comes out strong and holds off a late Montreal surge for the win. Hamilton finally puts some points on the board, but their defence lets them down late as Edmonton completes the comeback. The Esks weren't the only team with an 18-point fourth: after giving up 21 in the third, the Lions shock the Bombers with their own big comeback. Calgary wallops the Riders in the only blowout of the week, and Toronto fights off a feisty Redblacks offence to seal the deal with a time-expiring field goal winner.

ResultOttawa by 5Edmonton by 3B.C. by 3Calgary by 17Toronto by 3
Margin of Error4 to 72 to 42 to 412 to 222 to 4

I know we had an extra game last week, but holy points, Batman! Eight spreads nailed, including three—count 'em, THREE—by argoal to jump into first with points to spare.

argoalOttawa5Edmonton B.C.3 Calgary Toronto31123
JPROttawa Edmonton4B.C.4Calgary Toronto3921
ic23bOttawa4Edmonton4B.C. Calgary14Toronto31020
jjzucalOttawa6Edmonton Calgary13Toronto 619
ReeverOttawa Edmonton3B.C. Calgary Toronto 719
cixelsydOttawa7Edmonton 3Calgary Toronto 617
jagsnumberoneOttawa5 Edmonton Calgary14Toronto 717
rcade Edmonton B.C. Calgary17Toronto 615
tommytrumpOttawa B.C. Calgary Toronto 414
DrJohnEvansOttawa Edmonton B.C. Calgary16 514
Howard_T Edmonton B.C. Calgary Toronto 413
bender B.C. Toronto 212
tahoemoj Edmonton Calgary14Toronto 412

This week's narratives nearly wrote themselves, but I still had to step in at the last minute.


Montreal @ Winnipeg (Thursday, July 27)
Battle of the mushy middle! I guess Montreal is a win out of first, but I'm not buying what they're selling just yet.

B.C. @ Edmonton (Friday, July 28)
Battle for the division! League's best offence versus the league's best defence - and neither ranking is particularly close.

Toronto @ Saskatchewan (Saturday, July 29)
This game is also happening! Toronto may be good now? But Saskatchewan is probably still bad. But I never feel comfortable when Kevin Glenn starts against the Argos.

Hamilton @ Calgary (Sunday, July 29)
League's worst offence on the road against a very very good team! Things don't seem to be getting much easier for Hamilton.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:42 AM on July 26

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Five

Ottawa by 12
Edmonton by 19
B.C. by 6
Calgary by 16
Ottawa by 2

posted by DrJohnEvans at 04:01 PM on July 19

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Five

Toronto comes out strong but fades in the home stretch as Winnipeg hands them a million dollar loss. A big fourth quarter puts Montreal over the top in a Calgary upset. A nailbiter out west, but Ottawa can't quite seal the deal and Edmonton takes it home. Closer to home, Hamilton loses again.

ResultWinnipeg by 8Montreal by 7Edmonton by 2B.C. by 15
Margin of Error6 to 105 to 91 to 311 to 20

Another tough week for points, but jjzucal nabs three to leapfrog into first. Honourable mention for Reever whose 5 points lands him square in the logjam for second.

SpoFiteTOR @ WPGSCGY @ WPGSOTT @ EDMSBC @ HAMSPointsTotal Points
jjzucal Edmonton B.C.14313
argoal Edmonton B.C. 212
JPRWinnipeg Edmonton3B.C. 412
ReeverWinnipeg7 Edmonton3B.C. 512
cixelsyd Edmonton B.C.17311
tommytrumpWinnipeg B.C. 210
jagsnumberone Edmonton3 210
ic23b Edmonton B.C. 210
benderWinnipeg Montreal Edmonton B.C. 410
Howard_T Edmonton B.C. 29
rcadeWinnipeg7 B.C. 39
DrJohnEvansWinnipeg6 B.C. 39
tahoemoj B.C.1228

It's a no-bye week, and Ottawa draws the short straw.


Montreal @ Ottawa (Wednesday, July 19)
Montreal's been a pleasant surprise, but Ottawa's three tough-luck losses means they're still looking for their first win. I'll take Ottawa's regression over Montreal's.

Edmonton @ Hamilton (Thursday, July 20)
Hamilton's three losses have been anything but tough luck: they're getting smoked. Edmonton's at the top of their division with a perfect 3-0 record, but all their victories have been tight. Still, you gotta take the Esks until Hamilton proves they can play.

Winnipeg @ B.C. (Friday, July 21)
The Lions have looked great to open the season - but their depth may be tested. Do you believe in the second coming of Travis Lulay?

Saskatchewan @ Calgary (Saturday, July 22)
When I'm making these predictions, I look at all the numbers, take injuries into consideration, and weight recent performance more heavily. Then I remember that Kevin Glenn is starting for the Riders and I give up trying to predict anything.

Ottawa @ Toronto (Monday, July 24)
Redblacks take two! Toronto has surprisingly played better than their 2-2 record would suggest. Maybe they're due for an old-fashioned Argo bounce?

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:01 PM on July 18

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Four

Winnipeg by 6
Calgary by 19
Ottawa by 6
B.C. by 9

posted by DrJohnEvans at 11:39 AM on July 13

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Four

No wonder today's flights to Winnipeg were so cheap.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 05:55 PM on July 12

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Four

B.C. leans on their ground game to notch a solid win in Montreal, while Calgary's big second half ensures they remain undefeated. Speaking of big second halves, Toronto needed one after scoring only a rouge in the first, and boy did they get it. Out west, that Kevin Glenn magic has the Riders sitting pretty.

ResultB.C. by 7Calgary by 19Toronto by 1Saskatchewan by 17
Margin of Error5 to 913 to 251 to 112 to 22

A low-scoring week, but jjzucal notches three to move into a tie for first.

SpoFiteBC @ MTLSCGY @ WPGSTOR @ OTTSHAM @ SSKSPointsTotal Points
argoalB.C. 110
jjzucal Toronto Saskatchewan13310
JPR 08
tommytrump Toronto 18
jagsnumberoneB.C. Calgary 28
ic23bB.C. Calgary Saskatchewan 38
cixelsydB.C.7 Saskatchewan 48
Reever Saskatchewan 17
Howard_TB.C. Saskatchewan 27
tahoemoj Saskatchewan 16
rcade Calgary Saskatchewan 26
benderB.C. Saskatchewan1936
DrJohnEvansB.C. Calgary Saskatchewan 36

Three weeks of football in the books, and our narratives are finally beginning to sprout.


Toronto @ Winnipeg (Wednesday, July 13)
Here are two teams looking to establish a 2017 identity - this could be an opportunity for a big statement game. On the other hand, mosquitoes.

Calgary @ Montreal (Friday, July 14)
Montreal's showing signs of coming out of their multiyear funk, but Calgary's still coasting on last year's excellence. Odds are Calgary makes it to 4-0.

Ottawa @ Edmonton (Friday, July 14)
A tale of two Pythagoreans: Edmonton is 2-0 and +7. Ottawa is 0-2-1 and -5. Maybe this week starts to restore order for these teams.

B.C. @ Hamilton (Saturday, July 15)
It's early, but holy cow has Hamilton's offence been uninspiring. They'll need to be far better to beat the Lions.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:29 PM on July 12

What football will look like in the future

I think it's serial - and not finished yet.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:43 PM on July 11

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Three

B.C. by 12
Calgary by 9
Ottawa by 9
Saskatchewan by 9

posted by DrJohnEvans at 03:52 PM on July 06

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Three

All the cattle in Cowtown will need to find a new home, as the Stamps won a good ol' fashioned barnburner against the Redblacks. Toronto can't quite keep it together for a whole game, and coughs up eighteen points in the fourth quarter in a tough loss to the Lions. Montreal cruises out to an early lead, but Edmonton piles on for the comeback and the win. The Roughriders storm back to force overtime, but it's Justin Medlock and the Bombers who come away with the win.

ResultCalgary by 4B.C. by 13Edmonton by 4Winnipeg by 3
Margin of Error3 to 59 to 173 to 52 to 4

Familiar names at the top: JPR scores seven points to leap into contention, but argoal nails the Winnipeg spread to grab first place.

SpoFiteOTT @ CGYSBC @ TORSMTL @ EDMSWPG @ SSKSPointsTotal Points
argoalCalgary3 Edmonton Winnipeg 3 69
JPRCalgary3 Edmonton 4 Winnipeg478
tommytrumpCalgary Edmonton Winnipeg 37
jjzucalCalgary2 Edmonton 37
jagsnumberoneCalgary Edmonton 336
ReeverCalgary Edmonton Winnipeg246
Howard_T Edmonton Winnipeg 25
ic23bCalgary Edmonton 335
tahoemojCalgary Edmonton Winnipeg245
rcadeCalgary 14
cixelsydCalgary Edmonton Winnipeg 34
benderCalgary Edmonton 23
DrJohnEvans B.C. Edmonton Winnipeg 33

Continuing a grand CFL tradition, the third week of the season is the one that follows the second.


B.C. @ Montreal (Thursday, July 6)
B.C./Montreal is better than their 1-1 record would suggest, while B.C./Montreal has been overachieving. So this is a toss-up. (But probably pick the Lions.)

Calgary @ Winnipeg (Friday, July 7)
That first-week tie is going to mess me up every time I look at the standings. Anyway, if Winnipeg is serious about contending, an early win over Calgary certainly won't hurt.

Toronto @ Ottawa (Saturday, July 8)
So far my notes on Toronto's 2017 have been: Not bad anymore Still bad? A visit to old friend Trevor Harris and the Redblacks is an excellent opportunity to further clarify what exactly to expect from the new-look Argos.

Hamilton @ Saskatchewan (Saturday, July 8)
Saskatchewan is 0-2 but is only -4 in points differential. Something's gotta give.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:22 PM on July 04

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Two

Ottawa by 7
B.C. by 3
Edmonton by 14
Winnipeg by 10

posted by DrJohnEvans at 12:06 PM on June 28

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Two

A tight back-and-forth affair in Montreal ends badly for Saskatchewan as they miss a potential game-winning time-expiring field goal. Edmonton holds off the B.C. comeback to grab a narrow road win. Toronto plays its best game in four years to thump the Ti-Cats. And in what is destined to become an annual tradition, Calgary and Ottawa tie.

ResultMontreal by 1TieEdmonton by 3Toronto by 17
Margin of Error1 to 102 to 412 to 22

Tight spreads and a tie make it a tough week for points, but a nod to tommytrump and rcade for the 3-point nail.

SpoFiteSSK @ MTLSCGY @ OTTSEDM @ BCSHAM @ TORSPointsTotal Points
tommytrumpMontreal Toronto 17 44
jjzucalMontreal Edmonton Toronto 13 44
jagsnumberoneMontreal Edmonton 17 33
Howard_TMontreal Edmonton Toronto 33
argoalMontreal 3Toronto 33
rcade Edmonton3 33
ic23bMontreal Edmonton 22
ReeverMontreal 3 22
bender Toronto 11
cixelsyd Edmonton 11
tahoemojMontreal 11
JPR 3 11
DrJohnEvans 00

This year's Canada Day has been cancelled due to rain. But the CFL plays on!


Ottawa @ Calgary (Thursday, June 29)
As Ottawa heads west to complete the home-and-home, only one question is on everybody's minds: will they tie again?

B.C. @ Toronto (Friday, June 30)
Armed with his new receiving corps, Ricky Ray threw for a career-high 506 years at a gusty BMO Field last week. He must be itching to let loose indoors at B.C. Place.

Montreal @ Edmonton (Friday, June 30)
Edmonton's good now, right? [checks notes, finds only drawings of igloos] Let's call this one a toss-up.

Winnipeg @ Saskatchewan (Saturday, July 1)
Fulfilling an annual tradition, I just said out loud, "Oh, so that's where Kevin Glenn ended up." As always, it will end in tears.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 01:51 PM on June 27

The 13th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

On edit after reading all of the previews--is it only 2016 in Canada? Is that a metric system thing?

Yikes, I pulled all those from CFL.ca's "recent news" feed.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:32 AM on June 23

The 13th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

Saskatchewan by 7
Ottawa by 3
B.C. by 11
Hhhhamilton by 21

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:03 AM on June 22

The 13th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

THE PICK 'EM - What we do

It's a Canadian tradition: every June, we celebrate the reappearance of the sun by drop-kicking a frozen pig through the last remaining pair of icicles. Then we go back inside to watch football until there's more than 6 hours of sunlight each day (July 27 through August 8). We kill time by picking winners and spreads for each game. Why not join us?

THE SEASON - When we do it

The season kicks off this Thursday night and runs for 20 weeks through the summer. There are generally four games per week, mostly running from Thursday to Sunday.

If you're in Canada, you'll find the games on TSN. If you're in the States or elsewhere, there's usually a pretty dependable ESPN and SiriusXM schedule, but it does not appear to have been released yet. Stay tuned!

THE RULES - How we do it

Here's how it works. You pick who you think will win, and by how much. You then get points based on the result:

  • Picked the winner? You get 1 point.
  • Picked the winner, and a spread within the Margin of Error? You get 2 points.
  • Picked the winner, and you nailed the spread right on? You get 3 points.
  • Didn't pick the winner, but nailed the spread right on? You get 1 point.

What's the Margin of Error?

It's a window around the spread that's defined as

spread - round(0.3 * spread) <= Margin of Error <= spread + round(0.3 * spread)

So you can get rewarded for being close to the spread even if you're not spot-on. The bigger the spread, the bigger the margin of error, so you don't have to be as accurate when predicting a blowout as you would when predicting a close game. Here are some examples:

Actual Spread Margin Starts at Margin Ends at

So if you picked Toronto by 15, here's how you'd fare given certain outcomes:

OutcomeYour score
Toronto by 202 points (winner + spread within MoE)
Toronto by 101 point (winner only)
Toronto by 153 points (winner + nailed spread)
Hamilton by 151 point (nailed spread only)
Hamilton by 430 points (and deservedly so)

Any questions?

THE GAMES, WEEK ONE - Where we start

In lieu of attempting to sum up each team's status in a single sentence, for this opening week I'm just linking to season preview pages for each of 'em.

All times are EDT.

Saskatchewan Roughriders (Preview) @ Montreal Alouettes (Preview) - Thursday, June 22, 7:30pm

Calgary Stampeders (Preview) @ Ottawa Redblacks (Preview) - Friday, June 22, 4:00pm

Edmonton Eskimos (Preview) @ B.C. Lions (Preview) - Saturday, June 24, 10:00pm

Hamilton Tiger-Cats (Preview) @ Toronto Argonauts (Preview) - Sunday, June 25, 4:00pm

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 03:04 PM on June 16

SportsFilter's 15th Anniversary

SpoFi has given me the ability to quickly and correctly type "Saskatchewan" every single time. 10,000 hours etc. etc.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:37 PM on January 29