DrJohnEvans's profile

Homepage URL: http://blackiceblueturf.vsport.tv/
Location: Trawna
Member since: March 11, 2004
Last visit: June 25, 2016

DrJohnEvans has posted 254 links and 1776 comments to SportsFilter and 138 links and 1250 comments to the Locker Room.

Sports Bio

of DrJohnEvans: scholar, gentleman, SpoFite

In a nutshell
The teams
The platform
The commendations
Great moments in sports journalism

Hot Chat update: Thinking about integrating directly with Twitter. In the meantime, I'm on there, if that's your sort of thing.

In a nutshell

Go Jays. Go Sens. Go Furious George GOAT. Go rouge.

(Lose Leafs Lose.)

In our hearts forever: Andy Peters vs. Rob Ray. Okay, so it turns out that you can't watch that video anymore. Damn. In its place, I present to you Aaron Downey vs Brad Norton—the fight that changed the NHL forever.

Sara Orlesky is cute, but Patricia Boal is always in the right place at the right time.

The teams

Coming real soon.

The platform

There are certain inalienable truths in sports, at least according to me.

  1. "Intangibles" do not exist in any meaningful form. If a player brings something "intangible" to his team, that should be reflected in either his individual stats or the team's stats. If not, then his "intangibles" have no value and are not worth discussing.

  2. The NHL's regular season standings will remain inherently unfair until all games are worth the same number of points.

  3. The pitch-out is the best play ever conceived in any sport.

  4. You are not a unique snowflake: everybody here is a fan of a team. Referring to said team in the first-person possessive does nothing to strengthen your argument or make you stand out. Indeed, a comment beginning with "My Brewers" taints the comment's value by informing me that you're arguing through the blue-and-gold-tinted glasses of a Brewers fan, and not objectively as a sports fan. Be proud, but be reasonable.

  5. Winning breeds relaxation, losing breeds frustration. It is infinitely easier to get along with your teammates when you're winning lots of games. Let's stop gazing at .600 teams and talking about how they're all bosom buddies. (Feel free to do the same with .400 teams, though.)

The commendations

"... an integral part of the Sportsfilter.com experience." — NoMich

"DrJohnEvans … should be reading medicine articles if [he is] really a doctor and stop complaining so much." — LROD

"DrJohnEvans [is] only the median if you give extra weight in the direction of users who have posted more than one comment." — mexican

"... DrJohnEvans is now my new friend." — Kleptophoria!

"Where's DrJohnEvans with a cool scoring table when you need him?" — The_Black_Hand

Great moments in sports journalism

Like most discriminating SpoFites, I'm really picky about the commentators and analysts that I have to watch and listen to. Fortunately, there are a few shining stars which pop up on my television. Included with your basic Rogers Cable package up here is a scrappy small-market sports channel, The Score. Their programming's centred around their near-constant highlight/update reels. They're my favourite in terms of sports news and entertainment: they just have fun with the stuff.

Tell it like it is

Sunday afternoons feature The Score on the NFL, which keeps track of the millions of games going on at once. December 19, they were doing their usual mid-afternoon round-up. The game was Minnesota at Detroit:

[highlight reel running]

"Minnesota gets one late in the fourth quarter to go up by seven, but it doesn't matter, because Detroit marches right back to score the major with eight seconds left in the game."

[boxscore screen comes up]

"It's still 28-27 as we're just waiting for the extra point, I'm just watching it now... and THEY MUFFED THE SNAP! They muffed the snap! Amazing. Amazing. Eight seconds left, the touchdown, and they muffed the snap. Okay, hang on, we gotta get you this picture. Amazing. Amazing."

[highlight comes up]

"Okay, here is it. This JUST HAPPENED, folks. Detroit scores to nearly tie it up, and they muff the snap. Amazing. Amazing. Man. Lions suck."

I love good sports journalism.

How to call a Tampa Bay home run

From MLB highlights on The Score Tonight, Summer 2006:
TIM: Fifth inning, Johnny Gomes at the dish. Now he's a model, if you know what I mean, 'cause he does his little thing on the catwalk.

SID: On the catwalk?

TIM: On the catwalk, yeah.

SID: He does his little thing on the catwalk?

TIM: That's correct.

Recent Links

The 12th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em: It's that time of year again, when Earth tilts its northern hemisphere towards the sun, allowing the majestic country of Canada just a tiny bit of sunlight and - dare we say it? - warmth. Emerging from our igloos, we locals are delighted to find that the tundra has thawed just enough to stick a goalpost in 'er. Find the nearest two-four, brush off Frank's beaverskin, and voila! Canadian football!

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 08:59 PM on June 20 - 21 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Final Standings: Whoa, is it Friday already? I guess it's true what they say: a Winnipeg hangover lasts longer than any other. But hey, we had a pretty good game there eh? Ottawa puts up a good fight but Edmonton takes home the hardware. Details and final standings inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 09:24 PM on December 04 - 2 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition: Home field advantage wins again! Edmonton and Ottawa throw their way into the Grey Cup, and are rewarded with a trip to that place where no one has the advantage, ever: Winnipeg in late November. But the forecast is clear and only footballs should rain from the skies. Grab your souvenir umbrella, put on your coveralls, put down your umbrella because it's hard to put on coveralls one-handed, and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 04:28 PM on November 26 - 10 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Division Finals Edition: Home field advantage works out in the semis, although the Argos could've made things more interesting by asking their secondary to fall down less. Not that I am bitter. But here we are in Ottawa and Edmonton, two places you should never go in November, unless there's a Grey Cup berth at stake. Untangle your earmuffs and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 02:26 PM on November 19 - 12 comments

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Finals Edition: Leaves are on the ground, snow is in the air, and the Winnipeg Blue Bombers are cleaning out their lockers. Yes sir, it's time for the CFL playoffs! It's a fresh start: whether you competed every week in the regular season or watched jealously from the sidelines, all are welcome to join in this three-week sprint to the Grey Cup. Grab your union suit and make your picks inside.

posted by DrJohnEvans to fantasy at 10:03 PM on November 11 - 13 comments

Recent Comments

The 12th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

Toronto by 4
Winnipeg by 18
Edmonton by 10
Calgary by 9

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:02 PM on June 23

The 12th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

Lets get it on for the new CFL braggin' rights.

And a game ball! See above.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:01 PM on June 23

The 12th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

Yes! There is a prize this year, courtesy of rcade and Sportsfilter!


Wilson has been the official game ball of the CFL since 1995. Hand crafted in Ada, Ohio the CFL game ball has an exclusive Wilson CFL pattern for top performance and double laces for added texture and control. Every CFL game ball is personally inspected by DrJohnEvans and must pass the same specifications as those used on the field.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 11:02 AM on June 21

The 12th Annual chicobangs Memorial SpoFi CFL Pick 'Em

THE PICK 'EM - What we do

Maybe you're a Canadian hockey fan. Or maybe you're a Pacers fan. Or maybe you live somewhere like Drufus, Newfoundland, and your rabbit ears pick up only Icelandic public-access television. Whatever the reason, you haven't seen a meaningful sports game in ages, which means that the CFL's 2016 season is ripe for your picking. Literally. We pick games. We pick each and every single professional Canadian football game that will be played, in Canada, on 110-yard-long fields, with 25-yard end zones*, from now until the end of time. So why not join us?

* Some restrictions apply. THANKS TFC.

THE SEASON - When we do it

The season kicks off this Thursday night and runs for 20 weeks through the summer. There are generally four games per week, mostly running from Thursday to Sunday.

If you're in Canada, you'll find the games on TSN. If you're in the States, the CFL has a long-term deal with some random network called ESPN. And if you're somewhere else, you'll have to resort to SiriusXM on the satellite radio dial (which is a two-way switch with one of the options crossed out).

THE RULES - How we do it

Here's how she works. You pick who you think will win, and by how much. You then get points based on the result:

  • Picked the winner? You get 1 point.
  • Picked the winner, and a spread within the Margin of Error? You get 2 points.
  • Picked the winner, and you nailed the spread right on? You get 3 points.
  • Didn't pick the winner, but nailed the spread right on? You get 1 point.

What's the Margin of Error?

It's a window around the spread that's defined as

spread - round(0.3 * spread) <= Margin of Error <= spread + round(0.3 * spread)

So you can get rewarded for being close to the spread even if you're not spot-on. The bigger the spread, the bigger the margin of error, so you don't have to be as accurate when predicting a blowout as you would when predicting a close game. Here are some examples:

Actual Spread Margin Starts at Margin Ends at

So if you picked Toronto by 15, here's how you'd fare given certain outcomes:

OutcomeYour score
Toronto by 202 points (winner + spread within MoE)
Toronto by 101 point (winner only)
Toronto by 153 points (winner + nailed spread)
Hamilton by 151 point (nailed spread only)
Hamilton by 430 points (and deservedly so)

Any questions?

THE GAMES, WEEK ONE - Where we start

In lieu of attempting to sum up each team's status in a single sentence, for this opening week I'm just linking to season preview pages for each of 'em.

All times are EDT.

Hamilton Tiger-Cats (Preview) @ Toronto Argonauts (Preview) - Thursday, June 23, 7:30pm

Montreal Alouettes (Preview) @ Winnipeg Blue Bombers (Preview) - Friday, June 24, 8:30pm

Ottawa Redblacks (Preview) @ Edmonton Eskimos (Preview) - Saturday, June 25, 7:00pm

Calgary Stampeders (Preview) @ B.C. Lions (Preview) - Saturday, June 25, 10:00pm

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:59 PM on June 20

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Final Standings

Ottawa jumps out to a big lead in the first quarter, but Edmonton scratches and claws their way back over the next two. Both offences seemed primed to pop, but plummeted nearly as quickly as the mercury. In the end, Edmonton puts together a big fourth-quarter drive, including two pass interference calls (upheld on command centre review!), and punches the ball in to become your Grey Cup champions.

OTT @ EDMMVP BonusO/U Bonus
ResultEdmonton by 6ReillyUnder
Margin of Error4 to 8

Everybody gets two points! Which means argoal takes the cake. Congratulations!

As for those of us who didn't get two points, cixelsyd made picks in every week and came away with only three points total. A well-deserved Costanza. Congratulations!

SpoFiteOTT @ EDMSMVPO/UPointsTotal Points
argoalEdmonton Reilly 29
ic23bEdmonton Reilly 27
tahoemojEdmonton Reilly 27
jagsnumberoneEdmonton Reilly 26
owlhouseEdmonton Reilly 26
rumpleEdmonton Reilly 26
tommytrump 04
jjzucal 04
rcade 04
DrJohnEvans 03
cixelsyd 03

Thanks again to everyone for playing. See y'all in June!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:24 PM on December 04

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Ottawa by 3
Ellingson (subject to change)

posted by DrJohnEvans at 03:19 PM on November 27

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Grey Cup Edition

Some barns got burned this weekend! With perfect weather at both ends of the country, the QBs took advantage and piled up the points. Hamilton plays catch-up to Ottawa the entire game, managing to tie in with under 90 seconds left in the fourth quarter. But a miracle Burris toss on 2nd and 25 leads to a 93-yard touchdown and the game.

Out West, Mike Reilly straight outguns Bo-Levi Mitchell, as Edmonton pumps in five touchdowns to book their ticket to Winnipeg.

ResultOttawa by 7Edmonton by 14MitchellHamilton
Margin of Error5 to 910 to 18

Points are scarce as both bonuses go to the losing teams, but that's why you hedge your bets. argoal adds another point to his lead and is going to be tough to beat.

SpoFiteHAM @ OTTSCGY @ EDMSOWC BonusDWC BonusPointsTotal Points
argoalOttawa8Edmonton 37
ic23bOttawa6 25
tahoemojOttawa Edmonton 25
tommytrumpOttawa 14
rumple Edmonton17 24
jjzucalOttawa Edmonton 24
rcadeOttawa Edmonton 24
owlhouseOttawa Edmonton18 34
jagsnumberoneOttawa Edmonton Hamilton34
Ying Yang Mafia 03
bender 03
DrJohnEvansOttawa MitchellHamilton33
cixelsydOttawa Edmonton 23

Here's one reason (the only reason?) to go to Winnipeg in November:


Ottawa Redblacks (12-6) @ Edmonton Eskimos (14-4) (Sunday, November 30)

This is the matchup that nobody saw coming. Edmonton was a favourite until the fourth quarter of Week One, when QB Mike Reilly blew out his knee. The backups put together a decent enough 6-3 record in his absence, but the division looked lost to Calgary — until Reilly's return. Nine straight wins later, here they are, facing the upstart Redblacks with a wily veteran in Henry Burris. He may be forty years old, but he's proven that he can still find the end zone. Sunday's forecast is a pleasant -3 degrees Celsius with no hint of snow, so let's sit back and enjoy what should be a good ol' fashioned shootout.

Of course, now that I've written that, the final score is sure to be 16-9.

CFL.ca Grey Cup Preview »

MVP Bonus

Pick the MVP of the Grey Cup.


The points-scored O/U for the Grey Cup is currently set at 50.5. Will the total points scored be over or under that total?


Pick the total yardage thrown by all quarterbacks in the Grey Cup. This is worth no points and will be used only in case of a tie.

Example pick: Ottawa by 21, Ellingson, Over, 500.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 04:28 PM on November 26

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Division Finals Edition

Ottawa by 14
Calgary by 7

posted by DrJohnEvans at 07:20 PM on November 19

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Division Finals Edition

The Argos and Ti-Cats play a tight game to the end, but a fatal Argo trip and the big boot of Justin Medlock sends the Ti-Cats to the Eastern final. Out west, Calgary clamps down hard on the Lions, holding them to three field goals while notching a handy 35 points.

A windy day in the Hammer means Medlock takes the kicking crown, and despite Calgary's best efforts to score 100 all on their own, we come in under the O/U.

TOR @ HAMBC @ CGYKicking BonusLVP Bonus
ResultHamilton by 3Calgary by 26MedlockUnder
Margin of Error2 to 418 to 34

argoal finally gets his breakthrough, although he needs a score reset to do it! A healthy four points puts him in sole possession of first place.

SpoFiteTOR @ HAMSBC @ CGYSKickingLVPPointsTotal Points
argoal 3Calgary MedlockUnder44
ic23b Calgary MedlockUnder33
Ying Yang Mafia Calgary18 Under33
tommytrump Calgary18 Under33
tahoemoj Calgary MedlockUnder33
benderHamilton4 Medlock 33
rumpleHamilton Under22
jjzucal Calgary Under22
rcade Calgary Under22
owlhouse Calgary 11
jagsnumberone Calgary 11
cixelsyd Calgary 11

Cold enough for ya? Just wait 'til we get to the:


Hamilton Tiger-Cats (10-8) @ Ottawa Redblacks (12-6) (Sunday, November 22, 1:00pm ET)

Just like they drew it up: the Redblacks host the Eastern Final in just their second year of existence, and are the favourites to win. Henry Burris leads the league in passing yards by over a kilometer, and Ottawa easily handled the Ti-Cats in the last two weeks of the regular season. But no guarantees: last week Hamilton showed that it can make points happen with its team of backup QBs, and they still have the best defence in the division.

CFL.ca Eastern Final Preview

Calgary Stampeders (14-4) @ Edmonton Eskimos (14-4) (Sunday, November 22, 4:30pm ET)

Calgary's got revenge on their minds: they sat atop the West Division for most of the season, at least until Edmonton got QB Mike Reilly back and rattled off eight wins to finish the season. But for timing, these two teams have been pretty evenly matched. The snow should hold off, so look for some big throws on what should be a clear, sunny, bitterly cold Edmonton day.

CFL.ca Western Final Preview

Offence Wins Championships Bonus

Pick the quarterback who will throw for the highest yardage on Sunday.

2015 Passing Stats

Defence Wins Championships Bonus

Pick the team whose defence will register the most sacks on Sunday.

2015 Sacks Status

Example pick: Hamilton by 21, Calgary by 14, Masoli, Edmonton.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:26 PM on November 19

CFL Playoffs Pick 'Em, Semi-Finals Edition

Toronto Argonauts (10-8) @ Hamilton Tiger-Cats (10-8) (Sunday, November 15, 1:00pm ET)

Somehow it always seems to come down to these two teams (although in a nine-team league, maybe not so much of a surprise). The Ti-Cats are 3-0 against the Argos this year. BUT: each of those games came earlier in the year, with Zach Collaros at QB for Hamilton and Ricky Ray on the sidelines for Toronto. Now Collaros is out for the season, and Ricky Ray is back and looking just about like the Hall of Famer that he is. How much is a quarterback worth?

CFL.ca Eastern Semi-Final Preview

B.C. Lions (7-11) @ Calgary Stampeders (14-4) (Sunday, November 15, 4:30pm ET)

On paper, this is a mismatch. Calgary was just edged out for the division title, and was easily the second-best team in the league this season. B.C. was lucky to fend off a crossover challenge and just barely snuck into the playoffs. But anything can happen in one-game elimination. And even better: half a foot of snow is scheduld to drop on Calgary this Sunday.

CFL.ca Western Semi-Final Preview

Yes, I'm re-using last year's bonus names. But intentionally! Just look at that fish!

Swayze Waters River Salmon Bonus

Pick the kicker who will score the most points this weekend. That includes place-kick field goals, drop-kick field goals, PATs, singles, and fake field goals thrown for touchdowns.

2015 Kicking Stats

Las Vegas Posse Memorial Bonus

The combined over/under on total points scored for both games is 100.5. Will the actual number of points scored this weekend be OVER or UNDER that total?

Example pick: Hamilton by 21, B.C. by 14, Leone, Over.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:03 PM on November 11

CFL Pick 'Em, Final Standings

tahoemoj, nine years and I never noticed the second "o" until now! Honest mistake.

And congratulations! I'll look for your 20-point week next year when your sleep-deprived brain turns you into a CFL prognostication genius.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:32 AM on November 10

CFL Pick 'Em, Final Standings

Toronto grabs the win over Winnipeg in the final Argos game at the SkyDome. Ottawa hangs forty-four points on the Ti-Cats to take the East in style. Calgary rides a strong second half to beat the Lions in Vancouver, and Saskatchewan finishes strong by beating the Alouettes in Montreal.

ResultToronto by 10Ottawa by 16Calgary by 21Saskatchewan by 6
Margin of Error7 to 1311 to 2115 to 274 to 8

argoal's 76 points would have been enough to win the CFL Pick 'Em in any other year, but not this year. jagsnumberone's 83 points shatter all available records (2004 and 2005 are still a bit fuzzy) and he walks away a most deserving champion. He moved into first place in Week 2, took sole posession in Week 4, and never looked back. Congrats, jags!

At the other end, owlhouse comes within a Ricky Foley hair of losing his grip on last place, but manages an 0-fer in the last two games to hang on to the Costanza. Well done owlhouse!

SpoFiteWPG @ TORSHAM @ OTTSCGY @ BCSSSK @ MTLSPointsTotal Points
jagsnumberoneToronto Ottawa Calgary Saskatchewan 483
argoalToronto Ottawa Calgary Saskatchewan6676
JPRToronto Ottawa Calgary 373
tahoemj 064
cixelsydToronto11Ottawa 363
tommytrumpToronto Ottawa17Calgary Saskatchewan 563
rcadeToronto7Ottawa13 Saskatchewan 562
ReeverToronto Ottawa Calgary 359
benderToronto Ottawa Calgary Saskatchewan5556
DrJohnEvansToronto Ottawa17 Saskatchewan7556
ic23bToronto12 16 355
rumple 051
jjzucalToronto7 Saskatchewan 350
goddamToronto 6248
Ying Yang MafiaToronto7 244
owlhouseToronto12Ottawa 343

Thanks to everyone for playing along! Keep an eye out for the CFL Playoff Pick 'Em, coming soon to a SpoFi post near you!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 10:03 PM on November 09

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Twenty

Toronto by 4
Ottawa by 17
B.C. by 12
Saskatchewan by 7

posted by DrJohnEvans at 12:39 PM on November 06

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Twenty

Not that it makes a big difference, but I had another point (I had the margin as 3 for the Toronto-BC game).

If you picked the losing team, you only get the single point if you picked the spread exactly - margins don't count in that case.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:32 AM on November 05

CFL Pick 'Em, Week Twenty

B.C. holds off the Argo comeback to grab a playoff spot despite a messy 7-10 record. Calgary rides roughshod over the Riders, but it's too little too late as they must settle for second in the division. Hamilton looks lost without Zach Collaros, as Ottawa needs only twelve points for the win. And Montreal can't quite get it done in Edmonton, losing out on a playoff spot for the first time in franchise history.

ResultB.C. by 2Calgary by 23Ottawa by 6Edmonton by 18
Margin of Error1 to 316 to 304 to 813 to 23

jags has all but clinched, barring a miracle ten-point week from the second-placers, who have their own race to worry about. JPR has snuck up and tied argoal again. Who will prevail?

SpoFiteBC @ TORSSSK @ CGYSOTT @ HAMSMTL @ EDMSPointsTotal Points
jagsnumberone Calgary Edmonton17379
argoalB.C.3Calgary Edmonton 470
JPRB.C.3Calgary Ottawa Edmonton 570
tahoemjB.C. Calgary Edmonton13464
cixelsydB.C. Calgary17Ottawa Edmonton 560
tommytrump Calgary16Ottawa 6 Edmonton16758
rcadeB.C. Calgary Ottawa7 457
Reever Calgary 6Edmonton 356
ic23bB.C. Calgary20 Edmonton14552
bender Calgary Ottawa 251
rumpleB.C. Edmonton17351
DrJohnEvansB.C. Calgary30 Edmonton21551
jjzucal Calgary17 Edmonton13447
goddam Calgary 6 246
Ying Yang Mafia Calgary24Ottawa5Edmonton 542
owlhouse Calgary Ottawa Edmonton 340

The last week's games in a football season tend to be either Incredibly Meaningful or Completely Meaningless. This week we've got a bit of both.


Winnipeg @ Toronto (Friday, November 6)
Winnipeg's out and Toronto is in. But Toronto's been on a tough slide lately and will certainly want to pick up momentum before hitting the postseason road.

Hamilton @ Ottawa (Saturday, November 7)
This game has All The Meaning: the East Division title, and its accompanying first-round bye, are at stake. If my math is right, Hamilton needs to win by at least six points. But having lost two straight and having scored a mere 19 points in those losses - it won't be easy.

Calgary @ B.C. (Saturday, November 7)
Both of these teams have their playoff matchup set: against each other. That's right, next week B.C. travels to Calgary in the West semi-final. So what plays do you run when you're facing your playoff opponent? Probably not very good ones.

Saskatchewan @ Montreal (Sunday, November 8)
And we round the season out with a battle of the basements. If you've been holding off all year on picking Saskatchewan to win, maybe now's your chance.

Good luck!

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:52 PM on November 03