I'd like to point out that this is the absolute funniest thing I've read in weeks, that I plan to purchase stock in the company manufacturing the Whizzanator for its brilliant use of photos on its web site, and that Mike Tice has already been reprimanded for scalping tickets to women who want to watch Vikings players drop their pants at random tests.
By the way, possible Whizzanator slogans: Accept no other substiroot! We beat the piss out of the competition! It's a weiner! Get one or urine trouble! Possible Whizzanator spokesmen: Keyshaun Johnson Woody Hayes Jeremiah Cockheran Michael Bishop Doug "Skin" Flutie and, of course ... Dick Trickle Full disclosure: in researching possibilities, I stumbled upon this web site, which lists the 50 worst nicknames for a penis. Personal faves -- President Johnson, The New York Post and King Ohyeah.
Ha fucking ha. This story rules. Didn't Onterrio play his college ball in Eugene, OR for the Ducks? They should get some sort of dispensation. Having said that, you can't bust a guy for having this. Yes, obviously common sense tells you exactly why he has it, but it isn't banned. The price he will pay is some poor schmoe will have to actually watch him leak into the cup. Any volunteers?
According to the police report, a bag Smith was carrying set off security alarms before an April 21 flight. The alarms later were traced to a tube of toothpaste. Seriously? I've never had trouble with toothpaste, and I always bring some with me in my carry-on. Whatever, though. Back to the fake penis jokes.
How can you be 'caught' with something that isn't illegal? Man just wants to beat a drug test.... That apparently he has no idea when will happen. Because, me - I'm putting my Whizzinator in cargo. The odds of needing it during the flight are probably remote. However, chance favours the prpared mind and all that. By the way - whatever happened to just drinking a shitload of cranberry juice? Oh god - have the authorities caught up? Do we all need fake penises? Because in some ways that would be awesome.
At least he wasn't caught with a sausage in his pants like the guy in Spinal Tap. That would have been embarrassing.
As long as he doesn't get suspended, hey.
cut him what is this two seasons in a row at a boy smith.
Word spreads fast. Or would it be Whizz.
This is only the tip of the iceberg. There appears to be a whole industry on how to "beat" a drug test or cleance yourslef quickly for one. I suspected that congress would get involved sooner or later!
