Recent Comments by Samsonov14

Red Wings' Nicklas Lidstrom: I don't have drive to play another season

One of the things that will stick with me about Lidstrom is that he played for decades at a very high level without being a dick on or off the ice.

posted by Samsonov14 at 09:43 AM on June 09

6 Bruins Sent to Penalty Box at Same Time

That was both the best and the worst game I`ve seen all year. No defense to speak of from either team. Two great goalies pretty much hung out to dry.

Tons of fights, which is always interesting. Here`s what I think:

I liked what I saw from the Bruins as a team, but I could have done without Ference punching Moen when he was on the ice. Not cool. And as far as the goalie fight went the Bruins are lucky that Price didnt destroy Thomas. I know that it wasn`t that kind of fight, but Price definitely had a chance to take a few shots at Thomas when Tim`s jersey was over his head. Price held back. Classy move.

The other fights were great to watch. Krejci got KOed. Cant win em all. In the last scrum, Campbell and Boychuk went crazy on Pyatt and Spacek, who would have been better off turtling.

I didn`t care for McQuaid trying to take on Max Pacioretty in the closing seconds of the game. McQuaid would have destroyed him. Max did the right thing in not engaging, and then scoring in the ensuing powerplay.

All in all, tons of fun. If you are a hockey fan, try to find a replay of this game. I still don`t know if it was a good game or not, but I do know that it was insanely entertaining.

The rivalry is still alive.

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:32 AM on February 11

Tennis Player Makes Comeback Bid at 43

There are worse epitaphs than "He's slightly nuts." Good on ya, old dude. Keep on keepin' on.

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:32 AM on October 29

Bruins Extend Chara for $45.5 Million

I remember when the Sens had Chara and Redden and couldn't afford to keep them both. They kept Redden, and the Bruins got Chara as a free agent.

All I could think was that the Bruins got a big useless jerk that would be a big nothing while Redden was the guy that would be a great defenseman for years to come.

I was wrong. Chara is very good, both as a defenseman and an example to all of the other players on the Bruins team. I don't know what the issue with this would be. The deal is fair, it's not crazy front-loaded, and it's a decent salary for a number one defenseman.

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:59 AM on October 16

Rah Deal

I can't apologize enough for my last comment. Just terrible, with no explanation. I wrote that when I was drunk, which is frequently when good stuff comes out of my mouth. Once in a blue moon I puke, which is bad stuff coming out of my mouth. That was me puking. Sorry.

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:41 AM on October 16

Transgender female sues to play on LPGA

Atheist said it pretty well. It's a weird gray area, and while transgendered people don't deserve to be called into question as people, some of them might be called into question as athletes who are undergoing medical treatments that might be giving them an unfair advantage.

And before anyone gets mad at me for being someone that just doesn't understand, full disclosure: I have four dicks and a vagina.

in the bottom drawer of my nightstand

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:27 AM on October 16

Rah Deal

I'm going to sound like a jerk here, but I can guarantee that everyone in this scenario dederves jail time.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:33 PM on September 25

Rah Deal

Two different stories here:

The first one is where the author implies- with no real proof- that she was raped. RAPE! Maybe.

The second one is where the courts decided that she had her personal space invaded in an inappropriate way. That sounds kind of rapey, but in the eyes of the courts, its SIMPLE ASSAULT! Or something.

There's some terrible middle ground where rape and just being awful to a young girl come together, and that's where we are now. Something bad happened to this girl, and she still wanted to cheer for all of the guys except for Chad Rapesalot. She's a moron, but didn't deserve whatever did or did not happen to her.

If you can tell me why high-school cheerleading should still be a thing, I'll buy you a beer.

posted by Samsonov14 at 03:43 AM on September 25

Bet I can. Bet you can't.

Watched your video, and when your wife says "John does a home run" I was nearly overcome with delight. That should be on your tombstone.

John Somethingsomething
19XX-20XX
Did a Home Run
Loving Husband and Father

posted by Samsonov14 at 10:09 PM on September 22

NHL team names, and how they got them.

I love the Bruins, which as anyone who has read the article already knows could just as easily go by the less catchy but possibly more accurate moniker of "Grocery Bears," but my favorite team name by far is the New Jersey Devils.

The Jersey Devil was an abomination that lived in the Pine Barrens of New Jersey. According to this crazy Time Life Books series that my dad bought in the 80s (Mysteries of the Unknown), the Jersey Devil was the product of a tryst between an insane witch and Beelzebub himself. When it was born, the baby came out with the hooves of a horse, the wings of a bat, the face of a human lunatic, and the hockey IQ of Bobby Orr. That last part was added to make it awesomer.

It screamed all the time, and here's the part that messed me up when I was a kid: one night in some small town in Jersey in the 1800's, everyone in the village could hear the Jersey Devil screaming over the noise of the fiercest blizzard they'd had in decades. No one was brave enough to face both the storm and the offspring of The Devil, so they all stayed indoors. Many people reported hearing the Jersey Devil landing on their roofs, creepily clomping around. Clip-clop, clip-clop. In the morning, the residents went outside to check on their neighbors and make sure everyone was still okay. They found hoofprints in the snow. The prints could be traced all around the village. The fucked up part? They went right up to the wall of a building, disappeared, and started again on the opposite side of the house.

The moral of this story? I was an idiot as a ten-year old, and fuck you Time Life Books for making me freak out whenever an acorn landed on the roof above my bedroom.

Later, when I was in my twenties, I lived about 15 minutes away from the Meadowlands. I learned that as far as New Jersey goes, you are far more likely to see something horrifying in the parking lot at a Jets game than in the Pine Barrens.

Still, undeniably a great team name.

posted by Samsonov14 at 09:26 PM on September 22

Jets' WR Braylon Edwards busted in DWI

As a sports fan, I'm disappointed. As a Patriots fan, I'm disappointed that this didn't happen last week.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:27 PM on September 22

Max Talbot: 'Ovechkin is a douche'

It's simultaneously what's wrong with hockey and youtube, but it's still out there. Say what you want about AO, but he's fun to watch.

That's why the pros make the big bucks?

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:52 AM on July 30

Petrino quits Falcons to take Arkansas job

One of the biggest things you look for as a recruiter is the past history of a potential employee. Petrino jumping ship is a huge red flag. You wouldn't hire him - character is important.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:42 AM on December 14

The count is up to four.

I'm a huge Boston homer, so my opinion should be taken with a grain of salt, I guess. Having said that, I watched that hit many, many times, and still: Two games? Really? I tried to be nice about the Jones hit on Bergeron, because maybe it was an honest mistake. We're at the point now where there's no excuse for any more cheap-shots. It would be one hell of a coincidence if once in every five games or so one of the Flyers just happens to take liberties with an opposing team's player by accident. It would be one thing if they were the Broad Street Bullies of yesteryear, but they aren't beating opponents with their fists, they're blindsiding them. That's not tough. It's cowardly.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:48 PM on November 27

Martina Hingis reveals she tested positive for cocaine at Wimbledon, announces retirement immediately thereafter.

I'm amazed that she failed a urine test for cocaine. That shit is out of your system in five days, max - and definitely sooner if you have an athlete's metabolism. Either she got screwed by the testers (has that ever really happened?) or she's a huge idiot for doing coke just before a big tournament. Anyone know how often those tests come up with false positives?

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:01 PM on November 01

Bruins' Patrice Bergeron Leaves Game on Stretcher

Jones has no history of being a douche. As far as I know, he DID A THING THAT IS AWFUL and MADE A BIG MISTAKE. Bummer for everyone involved. He should have seen the numbers on Bergy's jersey.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:28 AM on October 28

Bruins' Patrice Bergeron Leaves Game on Stretcher

I want to be pissed at Jones. Or maybe I want to be pissed at the Flyers as a team, because this is the third time this year they've done something like this (see Downie, Boulerice). But mostly I hope Patrice is okay. He's a tough person, and I bet we'll see him on the ice again soon.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:52 AM on October 28

Sticking it to Sidney

I have met MrFrisby in real life. While I can't verify his entire story, I can say with 100% certainty that he has been high-sticked, and also that he is not pretty. And also that even though he is ugly, he still makes a good point.

posted by Samsonov14 at 03:25 PM on February 07

Conan O'Brien beats Serena Williams in (Wii) tennis match.

mdavidsf, I have never seen someone use an exclamation point quite as liberally as you do. You certainly are enthusiastic, I'll give you that.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:16 PM on February 03

Are You Bidding Me?

When I look for advice about this and that, I always consult a woman who is almost nine months pregnant.

posted by Samsonov14 at 07:09 AM on February 01

Champions League on ice?

I think you guys would be surprised at how good some of the European teams are. Ak-Bars Kazan and Moscow Dynamo from the Russian Elite league could beat many NHL teams on any given day, and Jokerit in Finland and MODO in Sweden are perennially great teams as well. A lot of very skilled hockey players stay in their home country because they can get paid almost as much at home as they can in the NHL, with the added benefit of not having to learn a new language. The Russian Elite League, although it is rumored to be fantastically corrupt, pays salaries nearly comparable to NHL cash.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:55 PM on January 28

Blake has the Penguins Spear-ited

Dustin McArthur used to run a hockey fight camp for kids. Something about that seems very, very wrong.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:39 PM on January 19

One Toke Over The Line, Ron Mexico...

I can't understand why he'd try to make a secret compartment in something that wouldn't be allowed on the plane anyway. Last time I flew, they confiscated my water bottle. Isn't that a rule? -Jeremy Guinea-Bissau

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:38 PM on January 18

The NHL to realign?

Chico, that's a great idea, dude.

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:08 PM on December 22

PITG wins slots casino license for North Side of Pittsburgh

Samsonov14, I don't quite understand what you are driving at. I would suggest you visit a Civil War Battlefield National Park (other than Gettysburg, which has been ruined by the developers - Antietam and Shiloh are the best I have seen), and listen to some of the presentations by the Park Rangers. You might learn that the men who were there fought not for commercial interests, but for pure ideals. No doubt, Howard. I know you weren't trying to be a cock or anything. When I referred to "gambling", I was actually thinking of Pickett's Charge, which was one hell of a gamble. Hence the $50 on Gray comment. I didn't flesh out the comment enough, I guess. Anyway, no offense taken, and I hope you don't think I was belittling the deaths of 50,000 soldiers. There's no one around who should get offended by Civil War jokes. And I think so too fatty, but you'd be surprised. I still have a redneck uncle who refers to the Civil War as "The War against Northern Agression" or "The War against Lincoln's Tyrany." No shit.

posted by Samsonov14 at 07:17 PM on December 21

S(he) failed

S(he) might qualify as a Hijra in India. This Wikipedia article is meaner than it needs to be, but Hijras are known as the "third gender" in India. There's a weird gray area that we in the West don't talk about much.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:05 AM on December 21

Let's hear it for the boys!

Pah. The U.S. doesn't stand a chance without Phil Kessel. Testicular difficulties and unexpected circumstances are the problem. Wish it wasn't the first time I've said that. (Sorry, Kim. It's me, not you.)

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:59 AM on December 21

PITG wins slots casino license for North Side of Pittsburgh

The board also awarded the two licenses available outside the big cities to the Las Vegas Sands for Bethlehem and Louis DeNaples for Pocono Mountain. The board chose those over a controversial proposal to locate a casino near Gettysburg National Battlefield. Janice Pietrone, a former Pittsburgh teacher who is one of the leaders of the Gettysburg casino opposition, was part of a contingent at the meeting. She said the battlefield already brings in substantial tourist dollars. The Battle of Gettysburg pretty much exemplifies the idea of "gambling". "$50 on gray." Something to think about.

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:14 AM on December 21

Marvelous Joe

en route to the second of three Cups that would bear his name I always write my name on my cups. Don't want to be wearing someone else's. Bing Bong!

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:45 PM on December 08

Tom Brady Blitzes Yahoo!

Both smart and pretty, archetypes of perfect form: Haikus and Brady

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:42 PM on December 08

Vote for Rory!

I like the idea of fans getting together to write-in one lunchpail player every year. I nominate PJ Axelsson for next year.

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:26 PM on December 08

Holyfield determined to be five-times champion

I can't name a single title holder in boxing but I know the pretty much all the dollar menu at Taco Bell. Chicken soft taco.

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:31 AM on November 11

Costanza shortage!

I continue to blame forces beyond my control, viz. the auto-draft that stuck me with Osgood and Auld as my goalies. Blaming outside forces for your own poor performance is the epitome of the Constanza Spirit. Keep up the bad work!

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:05 PM on November 06

Key to Hockey Goalie Success Discovered

So basically this article boils down to: "Keep your eye on the puck." Thanks, science!

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:25 PM on October 29

Coach Offers Kid Money to Bean Autistic Player

Hey LA, way to call someone "retarded" in a thread about how we should be treating developmentally disabled kids with the same respect that we treat normal kids. Guh.

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:25 PM on October 13

Coach Offers Kid Money to Bean Autistic Player

No worries, JM. I wasn't trying to be a dick about it. I'm glad to hear that Coach Angry is no longer coaching. For the record, every time I search for "bean" and "autistic" all the results have something to do with some British comedian.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:53 AM on October 13

Another Yahoo Fantasy Hockey League.........

Thanks guys.

posted by Samsonov14 at 11:00 PM on October 12

Coach Offers Kid Money to Bean Autistic Player

We've spoken about something like this before.

posted by Samsonov14 at 10:40 PM on October 12

Another Yahoo Fantasy Hockey League.........

League is full. Dammit!

posted by Samsonov14 at 10:35 PM on October 12

Got time for another hockey pool in your life?

Qbert, what the hell were you thinking with that roster?

posted by Samsonov14 at 11:25 PM on October 05

Got time for another hockey pool in your life?

I'm gonna F all you guys in the B. And then later, maybe I'll win this hockey pool.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:59 PM on September 27

Russian court bans Malkin from playing in NHL

This is "sports terrorism". The Malkin thing? Well, not so much. It's always disappointing when someone who knows they might be quoted blows an issue way out of proportion. I'm hoping the Director of Magnitogorsk is just a victim of a shitty translator. Otherwise, that dude has to start planning his interview answers in advance and having his friends look them over or something. As soon as you read that phrase, you start to think that that guy might be reaching a bit, and it makes his stance seem less reasonable.

posted by Samsonov14 at 02:48 AM on September 17

Zherdev: Replaceable?

Just like to add that Anson Carter has a history of holding out and expecting more money too.

posted by Samsonov14 at 11:33 AM on September 15

H2H Fantasy Hockey League Trophy Unveiled!

I vehemently disagree with engraving names on faces.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:35 PM on September 14

Oilers prospect, Robbie Schremp, is a hotdog.

It may be uncalled for in a real game, but I think that's a great thing to do at a charity tournament. The fans must have loved it. I only wish he had scored.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:32 PM on September 14

SI's MLB Fan Value Index.

I'm a casual baseball fan. I'm a nominal Red Sox Fan, but I've watched a lot more of the Mets in the past few years than I have the Sox. It's not my favorite sport, to be sure, but I love going to games nonetheless. The rankings were pretty interesting to me, because I've only been to Fenway (28), Yankee (19) and Shea (29). I had no idea that at some stadiums the food is cheap(ish), the travel is easier, and you don't have to plan your piss-breaks in advance. Still, I have to say the biggest reason I really enjoy going to the games is for the fan reaction. I can eat cheap food at home. I can use a clean bathroom at home, too (if I cleaned the bathroom first, but whatever), but I can't get that same feeling that a floor-shaking chant can give me when I'm watching a game on TV. I'd be interested to hear a comparison from someone more in the know - maybe a comparison of one of the higher rated stadiums vs. the lower rated stadiums.

posted by Samsonov14 at 09:45 PM on September 13

A Real Knockout Artist.

Dad, this is exactly the sort of thing that makes Sportsfilter great.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:10 PM on August 25

Hockey history

This is completely new to me, and I can't wait to read more about it. I wish he hadn't mentioned the midget goaltender, though. Don't get me wrong, I love midgets and all, but for some reason mentioning midget goaltenders automatically lessens the import of an article.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:00 PM on August 25

U.S.A.: U.n S.elfish A.ttitude?

"I go out there to be unselfish and it kind of rubs off on everybody else." LeBron. C'mon, dude.

posted by Samsonov14 at 12:53 AM on August 21

End of an era as Harry Sinden steps down:

Everything that needs to be said about this already has been. Yerfatma's nerdly simile encapsulates my feelings perfectly: I come not to defend Sinden, but to bury him. Sinden is a bit like Darth Vader for me: he has a past as a good guy that's worth remembering. The dude from the Dark Side I try to think of as another guy, because I don't know how you disentangle Sinden's actions from those of the Emperor, Jeremy Jacobs. Maybe Sinden was always a cheap prick at heart; maybe he was a good guy who has a three-legged puppy at home and all the good will in the world towards Boston hockey. Without someone to give us the inside dirt, it's hard to say whether he was ineffective from 1986 (to pick an arbitrary date) onwards or whether his hands were completely tied. His performance as a higher exec in the last 10 years has been abysmal, completely free from any sort of responsibility. In his press conference, Sinden admitted that he found it more difficult to keep up these days, and that he no longer was as familiar with the newer players as he would like to be. I am neither sad nor glad that Sinden is gone. If Jacobs was gone, on the other hand, it would be party time.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:25 PM on August 15

Landis Likely to Lose Tour Title

Grum, what's that all about? I expect better from you.

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:52 PM on August 05

You dare sully the good name of Jefferson Davis?!?

That's a pretty damn good point, Blue Carp.

posted by Samsonov14 at 10:57 AM on August 02

Death by Hamburger.

Walrus, that is fantastic, and would have been worthy of a link on its own.

posted by Samsonov14 at 08:16 PM on July 22

What a Day for Hawks and Havs!

I'm a total sucker for draft rankings. You can't take them very seriously, though. In 2003, when the Bruins picked up Mark Stuart and Patrice Bergeron, Sportsnet rated Boston's draft a "D". That same year, when Montreal picked Andrei Kostitsyn and Cory Urquhart with their first picks, they were rated an "A". Just saying.

posted by Samsonov14 at 07:34 PM on July 22

The World Cup Confidence pool - final results.

I enjoyed that quite a bit, and the photo-finish win by BPP was exciting to watch, even from back here in 7th place. Congrats, BPP! And Mr. Frisby: Ha ha ha ha ha!

posted by Samsonov14 at 06:04 PM on July 20

New York Rangers add Adam Hall

sirtt22, I suspect Henrik Lundqvist is going to get all the space he needs to expand on last year. (Unless you meant the New York Islanders & Rick DiPietro. And even that's not a good move. He's the only stable link in that chain.) True, but on the plus side, that's easily the most coherent comment sirtt22 has ever posted.

posted by Samsonov14 at 05:59 PM on July 20

Teen with cerebral palsy completes marathon swim

That is abolutely insane. Stories like this make me realize what a total pussy I am. That girl kicks ass.

posted by Samsonov14 at 05:56 PM on July 20

Here today, gone tomorrow

Here's an example for you. Cujo was a very experienced and capable goalie for the Wings (the most experienced they've had in awhile). By your argument, he should have a better handle on the overall game than Yzerman. Are you joking? I think you skipped over the part where he said that In general, the opposite is true. It's not a matter of picking one specific goalie and one specific forward. It would be a matter of comparing goalies as a whole to skaters as a whole. I don't know if garf is right or not, but if you're going to ask him if he's joking, you should at least have some idea of what the subject matter of the joke is.

posted by Samsonov14 at 07:21 PM on July 19

New York Rangers add Adam Hall

I don't know anything about Pivko, but Hall is a good player. The Preds seem like they kind of screwed themselves by giving away both of these guys for a single 3rd round draft pick. Maybe I missed something.

posted by Samsonov14 at 07:14 PM on July 19

Here today, gone tomorrow

When Smith was fired, I thought, "Wow, the Isles franchise just keeps on making questionable decisions. When will this all stop?" Not today, I guess. It keeps getting weirder and weirder over there. Do they just spin a decision wheel or something?

posted by Samsonov14 at 04:06 PM on July 18