January 5, 2008

OTHER MOMENTS IN A SOCCER PLAYER'S LIFE. : It's the off-season. Sergio stands before Sheri, his gorgeous cocoa-skinned girlfriend of nearly one week. They're in his South Beach mansion's movie room. She claims that she loves him ... but she really wants to choose the movie tonight.

"Please, Sergio? I love-love-love Brad Pitt and George Clooney," she says.

Sergio falls to the fine carpet, screaming, holding his hands over his heart as if he had been kicked there. The pain is too much for him to bear! He might not be able to take it one second longer!

read story | posted by billsaysthis to Culture at 4:08 PM CDT (5 comments total)

McSweeney's is always good for a chuckle. My personal favorite: George W. Bush Quotations in Which the Words "God" or "The Almighty" or "The Almighty God" Are Replaced by Famous Names Chosen at Random From the '80s Edition of Trivial Pursuit.

posted by drumdance at 5:47 PM CDT on January 5

The humor of this post barely equals seeing Tevez run to the sidelines with a pink pacifier in his mouth after scoring the only goal against Birmingham.

posted by worldcup2002 at 6:04 PM CDT on January 5

What the heck was the pacifier about?

posted by billsaysthis at 7:47 PM CDT on January 5

Apparently he was thinking about his baby. Read it somewhere but can't find a link.

Ah, here it is.

posted by worldcup2002 at 10:18 PM CDT on January 5

Thanks, bst, for a real day-brightener. It was a real hoot. 3 seconds to orgasm beats even my record (at least according to my wife).

posted by Howard_T at 12:41 PM CDT on January 6

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