Recent Comments by texoma-slim

The San Francisco Giants have now removed prominent tributes in the stadium to Barry Bonds

I think they should put a lifesize bronze statue of Bonds in the batter's box where he was standing when he hit his last homerun. That would make Giants games more fun to watch.

posted by texoma-slim at 05:25 PM on March 29, 2008

South Korean soccer players dislocate their shoulders to become draft dodgers

I would rather serve in the South Korean Army than play for their soccer team.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:53 PM on February 04, 2008

What's a coach really worth?

Are High School football coaches paid this much in other states? Yes. I have been a teacher in Texas for 9 years and football coaches consistenly make about twice what my cieling is. I make a little over half my cieling.

posted by texoma-slim at 06:33 PM on January 15, 2008

Chargers May Play Texans in Dallas

Although Dallas is four hours from Houston, if I recall correctly, it's also a city that has a rivalry with Houston's NFL franchise that's reinforced by a yearly preseason trophy game. Locals will root for the Chargers in that game Wrong. I am a local, and while I love seeing the Cowboys beat the other Texas team, I would still pull for the Texans over any non-Texans. Oh wait, LaDanian is from Waco and Norv gets honorary status as a former Cowboy coach. Go Chargers.

posted by texoma-slim at 05:57 PM on October 24, 2007

50 greatest sporting insults.

#51 must have been, "He couldn't spell cat if you spotted him the c and the t." Thomas Henderson about Terry Bradshaw prior to Super Bowl 13.

posted by texoma-slim at 07:19 PM on August 04, 2007

The Dirtiest Man in Football

THIS JUST IN: Science now confirms that if a person devotes their life to violence, including but not limited to football, rodeo, boxing, demolition derby, gang membership, etc., upon reaching "the golden years" they will probably suffer lingering pain. In order to avoid this suffering they should consider a career with a better retirement plan, like teaching grade school, where they will make millions of dollars and be hailed as heroes in the media.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:18 AM on July 04, 2007

Bird expert who wings in for Wimbledon

Great post. I love seeing someone make a living at their hobby. I wonder if a poster of Randy Johnson would deter pigeons.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:39 PM on July 03, 2007

Why don't I subscribe to Extra Innings?

That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves. Thomas Jefferson Don't step on me, I teach U.S. History

posted by texoma-slim at 09:57 PM on March 30, 2007

The 85 Bears Are Dominating Marketing Like The Defense Dominated The Field

As a lifelong Cowboys fan, this article sounds familiar to me. In the early 90's when Dallas was returning to prominence there was lots of talk that they would never be revered as the Roger Staubach/Doomsday teams of the 70's. By the mid 90's no one was saying that anymore. If the Bears string together two or three Super Bowl seasons in the next few years this team will likely replace the 85 squad in the hearts of many.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:24 PM on January 13, 2007

Club orders Bulgarian player to get married

Is this the club that just hired Mike Tyson as its team morale director?

posted by texoma-slim at 02:37 PM on October 29, 2006

NFL Fans, Your Silence is Appreciated

Couldn't wireless communication be intercepted by the opposing team and communicated to the defense? Even if defenses don't do it, anytime a defender gets a lucky guess and breaks up a play it has to enter the mind of the offense and play with their psyche. The crowd noise may actually be less disruptive.

posted by texoma-slim at 06:35 PM on September 24, 2006

Renegades Up for Grabs

I didn't know that guy who played the "Greatest American Hero" was commissioner of the CFL!

posted by texoma-slim at 09:51 PM on April 12, 2006

Pokey Reese is Missing

When I didn't show up for two days at my job one time no one came looking, my boss just left a message informing me of my unemployment and telling me if I didn't return the uniform they would dock my pay. It wasn't even a nice uniform, just a blue Dickey's shirt with someone else's name on the pocket and another someone else's name written on the tag with a marker. Maybe he is hiding so he won't have to return the uniform.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:00 AM on March 04, 2006

Athletes dumber than Spice Girls?!

A little insight as to why so many athletes go broke? They can't count change or figure out how much money they made in the first place. The good news for guys not on their toes enough to get a spice girl to tutor their children...Jessica Simpson is now available!

posted by texoma-slim at 10:59 AM on February 26, 2006

Behavior will bring change to U.S. Ski Team

Picabo gets my nod for coach. If not the Olympic team then my kids little league.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:53 AM on February 26, 2006

So his coach offers support? Buy him a jockstrap.

I wonder how much Saban really supports Ricky and how much he is just playing the role of a "players coach" and thinking about future free agency prospects and trying to have peace in the locker room.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:47 AM on February 26, 2006

Who the f%#k is Denny Hamlin

Team SkidMark, Hamlin was that guy in the front.

posted by texoma-slim at 06:02 PM on February 13, 2006

Remind me not to go hunting with Dick Cheney.

I used to work for a veterinarian and every hunting season we were swamped by old men bringing in thier dog with an ass full of birdshot. I would always think to myself, "Was the dog flying overhead, or does this guy just have no business hunting?" Presumably Cheney"s bubby was wearing slightly more brightly orange colored hats and vests than a dog might be, so I guess we know the answer to whether or not the v.p. has any business carrying a loaded gun.

posted by texoma-slim at 04:57 PM on February 12, 2006

As if anyone needed extra motivation.

Bulletin board material and trash talk motivation are acceptable terms in high school rivalries. This is the Super Bowl. Was someone only going to play half assed and then all of a sudden got motivated because they found out the other team actually expected to win? If so they probably aren't a big reason their team made it to the Super Bowl in the first place. This is the problem with the extra week before the Super Bowl, everyone has to find a story where there really isn't one. The second week must be a coaches worst nightmare.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:29 PM on February 01, 2006

Missing the tackle on Reality

When the article mentions how few former NFL players have any marketable skills, I can't help but recall how many people I heard say skipping their senior year in college is a good idea. The problem isn't with former NFL players, it is with college and high school football programs that move future nfl players through without giving them any marketable skills.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:41 AM on January 28, 2006

E.S.P.N. Gameday just became a bit more palatable

That game has way too many rules, Not to mention Gameday comes on at 9:00 a.m. here, so I'm not ready for that much drinking quite yet.

posted by texoma-slim at 05:53 PM on January 18, 2006

Official was wrong

Kind of like back in the 1980's when the Vatican admitted it was wrong to excommunicate Gallileo for claiming the Earth was round.

posted by texoma-slim at 05:00 PM on January 16, 2006

Redskins Chuck Gruden's Buccaneers

babooze808, do you also feel Dallas should change their name to the Cowpersons? Should Tennessee or NYG be the "Plus sizers due to big boneed genetics"? The other could be "Big and Tallers Because of Thyroid". And NO animal names, they are God's creatures, too, and deserve our respect!

posted by texoma-slim at 10:11 AM on January 08, 2006

New England Edges Jacksonville

rcade, on your fumble advancement question, I didn't get to watch the game so I don't know tge exact situation, but I believe the Stabler rule is only in effect on fourth down or within the two minute warning.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:58 AM on January 08, 2006

Nobody circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills.

Good decision....After all, Levy actually met the real Buffalo Bill at a wild west show once.

posted by texoma-slim at 07:22 PM on January 04, 2006

Soccer is more exciting than Football.

Are these alleged "scientists" among the people who think wine is better than beer?

posted by texoma-slim at 07:11 PM on January 04, 2006

Tice gets a sad, sad "Zygi" card...

Certainly not the best year to be looking for a new coach with all the openings. Maybe we will finally see some fresh faces on the sidelines. I wonder when we will start seeing successful AFL coaches, such as Danny White, in the NFL.It's certainly no more risky than promoting an assisstant coach or bringing in a college coach who hasn't dealt with salary caps and free agency.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:48 PM on January 01, 2006

God Bless Ye Merry NFL

We call it God's country because it was founded by religious pilgrims and Puritans whose desendants wrote a Constitution based on God's laws. I believe God cares about every single thing thay happens. He may not answer the prayer for a pass, pitch, or kick, but he cares.

posted by texoma-slim at 02:37 PM on December 26, 2005

God Bless Ye Merry NFL

I agree with Randy. Let's put God back in God's Country and Christ back in Christmas.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:56 AM on December 25, 2005

Oh wait, never mind. (NFL version)

Darn-it! I was hoping for an undefeated regular season and a loss in the playoffs or Super Bowl just for laughs. Now that they have a loss I will have a hard time choosing which coach to root for in XL, Dungy or Holmgren?

posted by texoma-slim at 05:49 PM on December 18, 2005

Oh wait, never mind.

If I ran a last place team with no hope I would trade for him. Otherwise there is too much to lose, like your credibility with the players that you keep telling you are going to do what is best for the team.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:50 AM on December 18, 2005

Words That Go Together Like a Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwich: 'Los Angeles Clippers' and 'First Place'

If you're in a hurry, don't have a pan, or just plane lazy try slices of banana on Nutter Butter cookies. Great in a pinch for snack time. It is always snack time.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:37 PM on December 17, 2005

Words That Go Together Like a Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwich: 'Los Angeles Clippers' and 'First Place'

Tubby, use a pretty ripe banana and squish it in your hand like grandma used to making banana bread. Smear it on the bread and place it in the already heated buttered pan. It won't have time to bruise.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:32 PM on December 17, 2005

Words That Go Together Like a Peanut Butter and Banana Sandwich: 'Los Angeles Clippers' and 'First Place'

I like mine grilled in real butter with an ice cold glass of milk. Don't slice the 'nana up, just smear it on the bread.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:59 AM on December 17, 2005

Sport

And I thought Deacon Jones and Priest Holmes were just names.

posted by texoma-slim at 07:09 PM on December 13, 2005

Space sports closer to reality.

Talk about your homefield advantage. A road trip to Jupiter would be hell!

posted by texoma-slim at 10:45 AM on December 11, 2005

Bush wins Heisman

nort, don't you mean the forty-first ever running back to win the award?

posted by texoma-slim at 10:37 AM on December 11, 2005

mutombo most generous athlete?

b from h, all of us should give about 10%. Athletes and other overpaid stars should give considerably more, but too often spend unwisely and need charity before it is all over.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:35 PM on December 08, 2005

Kenny Rogers goes back to the place he was booed during the all ster game

The Gambler probably has two years left in him, just don't try to film any of it with a camera you'd like to keep.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:31 PM on December 08, 2005

After struggling with one of the gunmen, Richardson was shot four times. He fell back on his father, who had a bullet hole through his jacket but was unhurt.

Richie Bee, on the 20 yr mandatory, I am pretty sure most of the prison cells in tyhe country are taken. Not only do I not want a new one built anywhere even almost close to where I live, I don't want my taxes payong ffor one someplace else. Being a Texan I tend to agree with Mustang71. The death penalty should be made available in alot more cases.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:13 PM on December 08, 2005

Red Sox play petty over championship ball

artifact...historically significant item It is a baseball, you can get one at Wal mart for $7

posted by texoma-slim at 07:08 PM on December 01, 2005

No more Expos

My favorite was the Charleston Riverdogs whose mascot was just a mutt fished out of the river.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:14 PM on November 26, 2005

Why do the Lions always play on Thanksgiving day?

I still don't know why the Cards played in place of the Boys in '75 and '77 but after checking attendance records I saw why they gave it back. In most places people apparently have a tradition of being with their family and watching the game on t.v. Meanwhile, in Dallas at least, tradition includes going to the game and eating dinner later, like Sunday when all those teams that haven't been to 8 super bowls play.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:43 AM on November 24, 2005

The Million Dollar Kick

When Kathy Ireland kicks does anyone even notice whether the kick is good? Just give her like 10 points and pray she it rains.

posted by texoma-slim at 10:23 PM on October 28, 2005

The Million Dollar Kick

Turbo, which three days would that be?

posted by texoma-slim at 05:37 PM on October 28, 2005

WS Ratings suck! Thank you, FOX!

Pitching wins games but hitting draws viewers

posted by texoma-slim at 05:32 PM on October 28, 2005

Jean Van De Velde goes for Ladies British Open.

I once got schooled in basketball by a college girl and I am DAMNED glad it wasn't on television. p.s. I didn't get laid either

posted by texoma-slim at 10:07 PM on October 27, 2005

Chess Boxing

How many times during a chess match have I said, "Just for that, I'm kicking your ass!"?

posted by texoma-slim at 08:50 PM on October 06, 2005

The Viagra Comeback Players

He has carried big wood this year

posted by texoma-slim at 08:44 PM on October 06, 2005

Ding-dong the witch is gone

The first player he brought in...Chan Ho Park The first player he let go....Pudge I didn't boycott the Rangers when W was in charge, but I did vote for Ann Richards

posted by texoma-slim at 06:50 PM on October 05, 2005

Tigress Wie.

I'll be damnt, all this time I thinkt my pa teacht me wrong

posted by texoma-slim at 10:00 PM on October 04, 2005

Is this in the best interests of all of baseball?

I agree nyfan, well sort of. I, along with most sane, rational people, want the yankees to lose and don't really care who the opponent is, as long as they beat the yankees. And quite frankly it would,nt take much for me to get sick of the redsxo, too. Let's go angels.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:51 PM on October 04, 2005

"Who dey? Who dey? Who dey think gonna beat dem Bengals?

Apparently it is difficult to make the "th" sound with no front teeth.

posted by texoma-slim at 09:18 AM on October 02, 2005

Robby Gordon’s Helmet to Assist Hurricane Katrina Victims

How much is $133,100 in confederate money worth?

posted by texoma-slim at 09:48 PM on September 20, 2005

Has Katrina ended the Saints season before it started?

Maybe it will be the rallying cry they need.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:37 PM on August 31, 2005

Buehrlie think that Texas may be "stealing" signs

So the Rangers are using an elaborate plan to cheat. That would explain why they have such a great record and are so far out in front of the rest of the teams in thier division......Oh, wait

posted by texoma-slim at 06:19 PM on August 30, 2005

Harris Poll / Does anyone really care?

Wouldn't a play-off cut into the second semester of the college year? Aren't these guys supposed to be getting an education at some point? I believe the reason for the big gap between the end of the regular season and the bowl games is to give the student athletes a break during finals for a semester thay have already sacrificed for the most part for a game. As a society, I think we need to get our priorities straight. Don't get me wrong, I love football, but we have a responsibility to the young people who are playing it first and getting an education later, then not understanding why we chastise them after they're arrested for making poor choices.

posted by texoma-slim at 05:38 PM on August 26, 2005

You're not wearing that shirt in this house!

I agree jersey. A few years back the late Johnny Oates suggested a "paint the town red" campaign in Arlington. He asked Ranger fans to wear red to the ballpark to show support. Maybe the Sox could offer something similar as an alternative to an activity that shows their fans in a negative light. I hate the Yankees, too, but I wouldn't wear anything in public that I wouldn't wear to Grandmas house.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:50 PM on August 25, 2005

Harris Poll / Does anyone really care?

I wish they didn't even name a national champ. Play to win the conference and go to your bowl game. If you think you're better than somebady else, put themon your regular season schedule. These big programs like LSU who won split the title two years ago open the season against North Texas(GO MEAN GREEN!) then want more respect in the polls at the end of the season. Nothing against the Tigers, that is just an example. If you want to talk about how you are better than OU, USC, etc. then put them on your schedule.

posted by texoma-slim at 08:42 PM on August 25, 2005

The bloody sock, however, is not for sale.

I have a traffic ticket I would like to get rid of. Any offers?

posted by texoma-slim at 08:26 PM on August 25, 2005