April 01, 2007

Greg Maddux in standoff with San Diego Police.: The former-future-hall-of-famer is reportedly intoxicated and has been screaming insults about Padres Manager Bud Black's selection of Jake Peavy as the opening day starter. San Diego County Sheriffs have surrounded Maddux's condo, and happened to find four dead prostitutes in the trunk of his Chrysler 300M. Sidd Finch, former peer prodigy and famous cohort of Maddux, has had no comment on the situation. Reports updated as they come to the public.

posted by Ufez Jones to baseball at 12:22 AM - 20 comments


posted by tommytrump at 01:10 AM on April 01

And another one ... Touchdowns now worth nine points; Longer field goals worth more.

posted by GatorDavid at 01:14 AM on April 01

April Fools Day sucks on the net. Just once I'd like to be suckered by something, but they're always so damn obvious.

posted by Drood at 01:25 AM on April 01

I must admit I hate and like this day. APRIL FOOLS!!111!!!LOLOLOL I really only hate it. Had you all going didn't I.

posted by Bishop at 04:23 AM on April 01

Umm...I almost cried...

posted by GoBirds at 05:01 AM on April 01

I refuse to place doubt in the abilities of Greg Maddux, even on April Fool's Day. Just seems safer that way.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 06:28 AM on April 01

APRIL FOOLS! Yeah. Tell that to the four dead prostitutes!

posted by wingnut4life at 06:43 AM on April 01

There's a reason Greg had his condo redone by the set director from Scarface. Say hello to his little friend!

posted by mbd1 at 07:37 AM on April 01

April Fools or not, I just have a great appreciation for the fact that on Google the first results for "greg maddux whore slayer" and "greg maddux dead hoboes" (neither actually in quotes in the search box) are pages from SportsFilter. Keep speaking the truth, friends.

posted by holden at 08:09 AM on April 01

Yeah. Tell that to the four dead prostitutes! It's time to cull the herd anyway.

posted by tommytrump at 10:01 AM on April 01

The truth about Greg Maddux must come out! (image of Wikipedia "information update" before nosey people "fixed" it)

posted by grum@work at 10:34 AM on April 01

I'll bet that really freaked a few people out. Priceless.

posted by louisville_slugger at 10:44 AM on April 01

"greg maddux whore slayer" Someone call Joss Whedon! I smell a Buffy spinoff!

posted by Drood at 03:14 PM on April 01

I wish all Wikipedia vandalism was that hilarious.

posted by Venicemenace at 05:59 PM on April 01

Does anybody have the link to the SpoFi wiki?

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 06:20 PM on April 01

So it is April 2nd in China and I came to SpoFi before the major news sites. I bit. After checking my status bar to see if it was an Onion link I quickly hit CNN and ESPN to see what the heck was going on.

posted by geekyguy at 11:26 PM on April 01

That's not a stand-off. That's an invitation to slaughter. DON'T LOOK AT HIS EYES!!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD - AVOID THE EYES!!!

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 08:09 AM on April 02

You had me at "ritualistic disemboweling." Nice work, Ufez. If Wikipedia mysteriously disappears, well, I'm not going to be the one asking questions.

posted by The Crafty Sousepaw at 09:02 AM on April 02


posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 10:40 AM on April 05

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