FanDuel - WFBC

December 23, 2003

The Sportscenter Drinking game.: A general rule here is to drink whenever the anchor makes a fool of him/herself thinking he/she is being funny. This will at least make watching Stuart Scott bearable since this rule will make you drink every time he opens his mouth.

posted by Ufez Jones to other at 11:13 AM - 19 comments

The problem I have with these guys is that they infect every sports guy on the planet with this gibberish. On the plus side, you know a catchphrase is officially played out when you hear it on ESPN first and then on the court second. "Gellin' like a felon," indeed. Have you no shame, sir?

posted by forksclovetofu at 11:46 AM on December 23

Stuart Scott has become nigh unbearable to me. He is simply incapable of calling a play with any sense of composure. He has jumped the shark.

posted by vito90 at 12:00 PM on December 23

In fact...

posted by vito90 at 12:01 PM on December 23

I don't mind most of the anchors, with the exception of Dan Patrick. I can't watch him.

posted by corpse at 12:23 PM on December 23

they all kind of get on my nerves from time to time. SNL captured them best a few years back with this SportsCenter sketch with Ray Romano. It was by far one of my favorite non-recurring SNL skits.

posted by jerseygirl at 01:02 PM on December 23

SWEET SASSY MOLASSSY!

posted by pivo at 07:34 PM on December 23

Pivo, you'll be glad to know that someone has finally adopted Sweet Sassy Molassy as the world's funniest band name.

posted by wfrazerjr at 08:49 PM on December 23

I'll gladly sit through an hour of hackneyed catchphrases to catch just a glimpse of sweet,sweet Linda Cohn. Hello Mrs. Robinson.

posted by ttrendel at 12:24 AM on December 24

to catch just a glimpse of sweet,sweet Linda Cohn. Hello Mrs. Robinson. Oh, God. *spews*

posted by dusted at 12:35 AM on December 24

oh man, this is the (biased) best spofi thread ever! But yeah, Linda Cohn, um, not so much.

posted by Ufez Jones at 01:18 AM on December 24

He gets happy-go-jacky on the big white guy like a donkey eating a waffle.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:47 AM on December 24

Linda Cohn is a close second to Stu Scott on the catchphrase list. She routinely quotes Ludacris and P. Diddy lyrics while covering the highlights. My question is, are there writers who force feed them these? or are they up late at night watching MTV2 & 3 to fulfill their lines?

posted by usfbull at 10:20 AM on December 24

He went five knuckle shuffle with the turn around no-look dime noogie and got paid and sold posters

posted by vito90 at 10:24 AM on December 24

I'll gladly sit through an hour of hackneyed catchphrases to catch just a glimpse of sweet,sweet Linda Cohn. Hello Mrs. Robinson. oh no, linda cohn really? oh ttrendel.

posted by jerseygirl at 11:36 AM on December 24

Olden Polynice drives the lane, and he's all "I'm not gonna pay a lot for this muffler!" But Karl Malone is all, "You are gonna pay a lot for this muffler, and the cost is going to be prohibitive!" "B-Y-O-B! Bring your own boo-ya!"

posted by jerseygirl at 11:41 AM on December 24

You guys actually watch SportsCenter? With the sound on? OMG, I am so glad that my gym doesn't feed the sound into the speakers! Boo-ya my ass.

posted by billsaysthis at 01:04 PM on December 24

I always wanted to be a sports anchor, yet clever metaphors and catch-phrases escape me. Like a fat girl waving her trophy from the smell contest.

posted by Samsonov14 at 01:34 PM on December 24

Way to go Sammy. You killed this thread cold.

posted by vito90 at 01:37 AM on December 27

I was watching ESPN's NFL pre-game show this morning at the gym and wondered, yet again, how this kind of show is put together. Not so much the result reporting but the throw it around the desk analysis and banter. Same thing for game commentary. How do these guys know what to say beyond just play by play and how do they work out the timing? Would make a great TV special.

posted by billsaysthis at 01:10 PM on December 27

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