What's the going rate to buy your way out of the doghouse? Four. Million. Dollars. Boy, doesn't that make my flowers and handwritten note look paltry by comparison? But then again, my indiscretions look paltry by comparison...
posted by vito90 to basketball at 09:48 AM - 24 comments
"Because I know him to be innocent, I will stand by him and we will face this together." Well, the innocence and the whole millions of dollars thing. But mostly the innocence. Honest.
posted by Samsonov14 at 10:33 AM on July 25
Ok fine. But you're still sleeping on the couch. I'll go put this with the others.
posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 10:44 AM on July 25
So I guess when the divorce comes, her cut will be 1/2 + $4 million dollars in merchandise. Wonder what he did for smaller infractions? Bought her a Bentley if he stayed out too late?
posted by cobra! at 10:46 AM on July 25
Kobe's media train wreck is having the same effect on me as the O.J. trial: I have an intense desire to stick my fingers in my ears and scream "la la la la la, I can't HEAR you!!"
posted by dusted at 11:56 AM on July 25
Ugh. That makes me sick. It makes women look SO BAD. Is she standing by him because she believes in him or because the 4 million dollar ring is a nice reminder of how much he's worth and the amazing life she gets to lead with him. Makes us all look like money-grubbers. I'd like to see what a 4 million dollar rings costs. Phew. Nice gift. Too bad he had to do what he did to feel she earned it.
posted by aacheson at 11:57 AM on July 25
I'd like to see what a 4 million dollar rings costs And I'd like to know who's buried in Grant's tomb...sorry, had to. I assume you meant "looks like." I wonder if this was Kobe's idea, or if he said to her "What's it gonna take to make this better? And she said "An obcenely expensive piece of jewelry." It's sickening either way to think about someone blowing that much money on a bunch of rocks.
posted by pitchblende at 12:06 PM on July 25
You're right. I meant "looks like." Sheesh, I'm blonde today....
posted by aacheson at 12:15 PM on July 25
aa: are you married to msacheson? I'm inquisitive today.
posted by worldcup2002 at 12:20 PM on July 25
Yep. Or better yet, he's married to me. :)
posted by aacheson at 12:23 PM on July 25
Oh, we gotta do the first married couple SpoFi Locker Room interview! You guys up for that? I've gotta finish up the current one w/ wfrazerjr but then do you think you guys could do an interview?
posted by worldcup2002 at 12:27 PM on July 25
Dammit, I would have sat there and held his hand while he pronounced his innocence for a mere $3.5 million.
posted by mbd1 at 12:28 PM on July 25
Of course. As long as you promise not to laugh at my sports...um....ignorance...
posted by aacheson at 12:30 PM on July 25
For half that sum, I'd eat Kobe beef.
posted by vito90 at 12:30 PM on July 25
vito90, I've PAID to eat Kobe beef - it's delicious!
posted by dusted at 12:42 PM on July 25
Oh Jeez. I can't stop laughing.
posted by Samsonov14 at 01:15 PM on July 25
How many other opportunities does an 18 year old female in this (or other) country have to earn millions of dollars? Exceptions would be singer, actress, model but those are a lot harder than "marry NBA superstar" if an NBA superstar falls in love with you. Wife used to be a respectable career and (possibly, since I know neither of these people) Vanessa B. is just updating the definition. Consider the whole trophy wife phenomenon, after all.
posted by billsaysthis at 01:53 PM on July 25
wc2002, (dammit, how'd my wife get on here? Is there a bug) a sports interview with the two of us would be pretty one-sided. When we team up in Trivial Pursuit, we're deadly cuz I know all the green thingies and she knows the rest. Against each other, I beat her, of course, cuz she don't know sports. She gets to the end and gets stuck. Well, except for that one question about iced-tea. WTF does that have to do with sports? No fair. ask about the gold-diggin' cheated-on spouses of superstars, and she's got a lot to say. Ask why NY Rangers fans chant, "Potvin sucks"? clamshell. She does have a great story about her first hockey game.
posted by msacheson at 05:51 PM on July 25
4 million is chump change compared to what she's going to get when she divorces him.
posted by jerseygirl at 06:58 PM on July 25
I picture she and Kobe holding hands in a little inset window on the teevee while Pat Sajak tours them through the possible prize purchases for not spelling D-I-V-O-R-C-E. The sad thing is you can get the same ring at Service Merchandise for like $99.95.
posted by yerfatma at 07:14 PM on July 25
Jerseygirl: You're not kidding. If Kobe somehow gets through this mess he's going to quickly learn the definition of "community property state". Think that might impact his choice of teams next year? Let's see, Spurs - out, Mavericks - out, Supersonics - out, Bucks - out...
posted by kloeprich at 07:25 PM on July 25
achesons, the interview is not a sports quiz, it's too bring out the personality behind the postings, so her lack or his depth of sports trivia knowledge is reasonably irrelevant. Though good beer stories help.
posted by billsaysthis at 07:48 PM on July 25
Ah, if beer stories count, then we should be home free! (And, I'm not a complete sports moron.) On the topic of the post.... I wonder what the 4 million dollar ring buys him. Obviously her staying with him, but does it buy them domestic bliss? Is she not allowed to rag on him for cheating on her? What happens if it was rape? Are all bets off? Jerseygirl is right. That woman is going to be rich beyond her dreams in a couple of years when they divorce. The ring will just be the icing.
posted by msacheson at 09:49 PM on July 25
First the divorce, then the book deal, then the Barbara Walters sit down interview. She's going to be the Ivana Trump of 20-something divorcees. Okay, 7 carat diamond = $100k. How big is this 4 million dollar rock?
posted by jerseygirl at 11:16 AM on July 26
ok, 8 carat. ahem.
posted by jerseygirl at 11:25 AM on July 26
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