FanDuel - WFBC

December 16, 2011

Hockey Player Banned for Pooping in Opponent's Glove: "Midway through the second period, Bermingham came out of his locker room. He had showered and changed and was ready to crack open a beer but needed to collect the last of his scattered equipment. Those gloves were nearly new: this was the second game he had worn them, and the price tag was still on. Bermie went into the seats where it had landed, picked it up, and put his hand in. ..."

posted by rcade to hockey at 09:16 AM - 12 comments

"Bermie knew he needed to get out of there or he would have killed the guy," one says. "And he probably needed to wash his hands."

Indeed, I bet he did.

posted by apoch at 09:36 AM on December 16

THAT'S A SHITTY CALL, REF!

posted by wfrazerjr at 10:15 AM on December 16

Too bad they were new gloves; if they were older, the poop might have improved the smell.

posted by tahoemoj at 11:11 AM on December 16

If they were older, the poop might have improved the smell.

A hockey bag is one of the single worst smelling things on earth.

posted by Debo270 at 11:38 AM on December 16

Rogue Squadron has won every game this year in which one of their players didn't poop inside an opponent's equipment.

Just beautiful... I laughed out loud, for sure!

posted by myshtigo at 12:40 PM on December 16

A hockey bag is one of the single worst smelling things on earth.

I had a run of superstition in my junior year of high school, when both my team and myself were having an unprecedented season. In my infinite 16 year old wisdom, I determined not to wash the t-thirt I wore under my equipment until we lost. After about ten or twelve consecutive victories (along with 5 practices per week for the 5 or 6 weeks involved), the stench was just breathtaking. I almost felt bad for opposing centers who had to line up against me.

The point is that, even with that rotting t-shirt in the bag, my gloves were the worst smelling item in it.

posted by tahoemoj at 12:44 PM on December 16

I determined not to wash the t-thirt I wore under my equipment until we lost

I did the same thing with the shirt I wore under my football pads to the point that when it would dry, it was actually stiff. Still smelled nowhere near what hockey gloves stink like.

posted by Debo270 at 01:00 PM on December 16

This is, without a doubt, my favorite poop related story of the year.

posted by Joey Michaels at 01:50 PM on December 16

Mirazyme. Takes the stench out of whitewater gear...it'll take the stench out of anything.

posted by lil_brown_bat at 03:19 PM on December 16

I don't get to watch much pro hockey. When the guys come off between periods, they all hand off their gloves to the equip. managers. This is so they can get them dried out a bit, I'm guessing?

posted by beaverboard at 05:30 PM on December 16

When the guys come off between periods, they all hand off their gloves to the equip. managers. This is so they can get them dried out a bit, I'm guessing?

Dried out or, more likely, replaced with a different pair while the first ones are properly cleaned/dried.

NHL teams have taken steps to help stop the spread of influenza, infections, and other illnesses that are passed through equipment and water bottles. If you have even a small cut, sweaty equipment can be a prime incubation zone for staph infections.

posted by grum@work at 06:00 PM on December 16

Poop jokes are always funny...well, at least until someone poops in your glove, then I suppose not.

From my point of view, my son's lacrosse bag actually smells worse than my hockey bag did. Could be that back in my hockey days we had all of our practices, and half of our games, outside. Maybe the cold air helped keep the sweat down.

posted by dviking at 09:49 PM on December 16

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