March 20, 2003

UEFA Cup LIVE!: Liverpool vs Celtic (805pm GMT/305pm EST). Liverpool host Celtic in the second leg of this UEFA Cup quarterfinal. Liverpool holds a slight advantage (due to the away-goals rule) after securing a 1-1 draw in the first leg. Outside the stadium, the crowd will experience an increased police presence due to allegations of rampant ticket forgery. Inside the stadium, they will witness the resurgence of Michael Owen, who attributes his recent slumps and current hot form to pumping iron.

posted by worldcup2002 to soccer at 12:54 PM - 13 comments

Go Celtic! Thompson takes the free-kick - 30 yards out, just to the right - and sends in a daisy-cutter which goes under the wall (they jump out of the way) and into the net. Huh, is it hard to time a kick under the wall like that?

posted by eckeric at 03:06 PM on March 20, 2003

No... Let me guess, Heskey, Carragher and Murphy are in the lineup?

posted by StarFucker at 03:14 PM on March 20, 2003

If the defenders in the wall jump (which they do very often), they try to time their jump with the arrival of the ball. Since they are only ten yards away, they usually leap as soon as the ball is struck. So, if a player wants to try to squeeze a shot under the wall, they just kick it on the ground and hope the opposing players jump.

posted by pfuller at 03:17 PM on March 20, 2003

Hmn, everyone is just sort of trying to out-guess each other, then? Cool.

posted by eckeric at 03:27 PM on March 20, 2003

Daisy-cutter. Very nice. When did that term insinuate itself into match reportage? Around the US v Taliban match, erm, I mean, war? I'm waiting for the first commentary that goes: "And Gerrard drops the MOAB on Seaman."

posted by worldcup2002 at 03:42 PM on March 20, 2003

2140: GOAL. Liverpool 0-2 Celtic John Hartson plays a neat one-two with Henrik Larsson before picking his spot from 20 yards. Liverpool really should have closed him down. Well, I guess that does it then. Good night, folks.

posted by worldcup2002 at 03:50 PM on March 20, 2003

Yep, thats it... Carragher was man of the match!

posted by StarFucker at 04:17 PM on March 20, 2003

Thanks for your emails, and please accept my apologies for our system dying midway through the second half. It lasted a damn sight longer than Liverpool, I can tell you that for nothing. This seems to have happened a few times now. I wonder what is going on over there. On preview: I wonder if I meant the Guardian or Liverpool?

posted by pfuller at 04:38 PM on March 20, 2003

Hooooo! Peefuller. You will be crying in your soup at the end of the season. Man U will be out of the Champs, out of the silverware in all competitions. And, through your tears, you will marvel at my superior position in the SpoFi League. It is bad karma to mess with my Liverpool.

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:15 PM on March 20, 2003

**Drunk's match report** It shouldn't have been a free-kick, on numerous replays the "offence" committed just didn't occur. The free-kick squeezed under super Steven Gerrard, who aside from being criminally disconnected from the rest of the wall, turned his back on it too. There was no real skill involved, it was just hit hard and low, if the wall had stayed static it wouldn't have gone in. Hartson scored with a marvellous shot from the edge of the area. He took the ball down, sidestepped away from a defender and blasted it, off the outside of his foot, into the top right corner. Dudek got fingertips on it but not enough to deflect it from the target. Excellent goal. Liverpool, as a whole, failed to seriously threaten Celtic despite controlling large portions of the game. Their lack of width showed again and Celtic coped admirably with the few forays they made towards goal. Owen had his moments, as did Heskey and Gerrard, but Celtic defended well and allowed very few chances. That is all.

posted by squealy at 06:22 PM on March 20, 2003

That damn lack of width again. And without Diouf, who's to provide it? Smicer? Ha! Time to sell Smicer and go buy Duff or Dunn. And fat-boy Hartson. Wasn't he last playing for Coventry? Go figure.

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:30 PM on March 20, 2003

Haha I just realized that if we buy Duff, we'll have two wingers called Diouf and Duff. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

posted by worldcup2002 at 06:31 PM on March 20, 2003

hello there ! celtic for the cup !

posted by sgt.serenity at 07:03 PM on March 21, 2003

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