Didn't I see a Simpsons' episode where all that shit happened to Homer? But this would make an excellent movie. I was thinking Jim Carey could play Johnny. I smell Oscar.
posted by Desert Dog at 06:19 PM on February 22
Scotty just had a news conference. He announced that he was gay when he played in the NBA, but now he is heterosexual. Good luck on the comeback Scotty!
posted by Desert Dog at 03:30 PM on February 16
With all the hate this incident brought out, I doubt we'll be seeing too many (read 'zero') pro athletes or anyone contemplating coming out come out any time soon. Thats got to be a ton of weight to be carrying around, not being able to be who you are. You can't be who you are out of fear. That would suck.
posted by Desert Dog at 05:48 PM on February 15
All I know is that they're all evil. Shower with them? No freaking way. They'll eat you without a second thought. And don't bother trying to sleep around one. They'll eat your brain. And then they make those evil little baloon animals and have the flowers that squirt water in your face. Ha ha. Very funny you evil bastard. And what do you think those big feet are for? I'll tell you exactly what they're for. They're to STOMP you with. OK, I'm going to exercise my freedom of speech. I HATE CLOWNS!!
posted by Desert Dog at 02:15 PM on February 15
I LOVED THE BIG FELLA! REST IN PEACE! And Weedy, why is it when you attempt a humorous post on a thread like this you're funny. When I attempt humor, I'm an insensitive asshole (probably because I am, but still). SummersEve, that was utterly hilarious. Thanks for the laugh.
posted by Desert Dog at 11:05 AM on January 30
He's running out of chances. If he keeps up his drug lifestyle when he gets out, he'll be dead within two years. Hope he makes it this time.
posted by Desert Dog at 04:12 PM on December 22
The fact he pissed in the street isn't the big deal. It's the fact he was drunk and didn't take a piss somewhere more discretely. He called attention to himself and investigation revealed he was DUI. Have many of us driven when perhaps we've had a few too many? I know I have in the past. Notice I said in the past. Most people in their early 20's don't always think too clearly, even when they're not buzzed. Hopefully he will be humbled by this experience and not let himself get in this kind of situation again. I think a little maturity contributes to better decision making. I know it did for me.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:02 PM on December 22
TO or not, it's bad sportsmanship to spit on someone. I don't think it matters who is involved, i.e. Favre, the Mannings, Brady or whoever. TO should be fined, but not suspended. As far as hocking one on Eli Manning, I think there are a lot of Giants fans who would gladly let him have it. "PTOOEY! Hey Eli, you're a fuckin' bum!" (in best Bronx accent).
posted by Desert Dog at 11:22 AM on December 18
Politics in sports at it's finest. I don't follow soccer too much, but from what I can see, the passion and intensity fans display is is unmatched in any other sport in any part of the world. Downright scary.
posted by Desert Dog at 11:11 AM on December 18
Arrogant. When you're a fan of a great undefeated team like this year's Buckeyes, arrogant is good. Come on, if the shoe were on the other foot with the Wolverines as the undefeated team and the Bucks on the outside looking in, Michigan fans would be the same. We're just enjoying a season that doesn't come around very often.
posted by Desert Dog at 11:02 AM on December 18
Stomp his guts out? Man, that's mild. I'd poke his eyes out. Then, I'd get in my mini-van and run him over. Then I'd light him on fire. Then I'd hang him from the goal post and punch him like a heavy bag. Then I'd...
posted by Desert Dog at 08:56 PM on December 17
Clevelander32, you pretty much hit it right on the head. But think about something. How sweet would it be to kick Michigan's ass TWICE in one year? That would be freakin' awesome. But Sydney 2000 would come up with some chicken-shit excuse like the team had too many White Castle's and had the shits. Nice.
posted by Desert Dog at 08:40 PM on December 17
Hey sydney2006, you're mumbling. You might want to take those sour grapes out of your mouth. Nice of you to blame the loss on Bo inconveniently passing away. How inconsiderate of him. Nice comeback.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:50 PM on December 16
I think I'll pass on the cancer and just remain the average schmoe that I am.
posted by Desert Dog at 10:11 AM on December 15
I'm sure that in a few years from now when Terry Glenn or Roy Williams need a kidney that they could call TO. I'm sure he wouldn't give it a second thought:)
posted by Desert Dog at 09:55 AM on December 14
OK, OK, OK. I fucked up, my bad. Seriously. My apologies to everyone I offended, especially Chicobangs because it was he who posted the thread. I've been around SpoFi long enough to realize you don't do what I did. Dumb attempt at humor. Won't happen again. Assholery is a rightful term. Grum, I wasn't trying to offend anyone, just trying to be funny. Obviously, not funny. Jerkus Majorus. Your'e one intelligent guy.
posted by Desert Dog at 09:05 PM on December 12
Not recommended, YYM, not recommended.
posted by Desert Dog at 06:45 PM on December 10
If one person or a thousand 'belittles' a thread I post or a subject I like I'm not going to get upset and try to intimidate them. So I made a joke about the WNBA. Why would that upset anyone? I didn't attack anyone personally. It was a joke. You guys didn't think it was funny, so just move on. If I thought it was going to cause this much of a problem, I WOULD HAVE DONE IT SOONER! (once again, no offense intended to anyone). Lighten up, people.
posted by Desert Dog at 12:18 PM on December 10
If you want to ban me, ban me. I was just making light of the situation. I imagine 98 per cent of people who read SportsFilter don't care about the WNBA and shouldn't comment. Like I said, I was just joking around. If anyone has read any of my comments on anything, they'll realize I like to take a humorous approach to most things. If I pissed anybody off, tough shit, I was fucking around. Chico, your'e one of the first people on this site to light into me. I respect your opinion. You should have a feeling by now that I just like to stir the pot once in awhile and don't mean to run over anybody's puppy. So if anyone thinks I should be banned, ban me. It seems everyone is just getting too sensitive.
posted by Desert Dog at 11:49 PM on December 09
YOU TELL 'EM, CHICO! We will not allow ANYONE to disrespect the WNBA. Those guys play their little hearts out. What's this I hear about Lyle Leslie getting some chick pregnant?
posted by Desert Dog at 04:53 PM on December 09
Weedy put "excretia"and "chocolate-dipped Jesus" in the same post. How fucking brilliant is that?!
posted by Desert Dog at 05:31 PM on December 01
I read somewhere that Mike Tyson wants to spar with her on his barnstorming tour.
posted by Desert Dog at 10:53 AM on December 01
Holy shit! Luther70 was using punctuation (well, sometimes). We knew you could do it! It's a fine day in SpoFi land. (just messin' with you luther70!;)
posted by Desert Dog at 11:31 AM on November 30
I remember Thomas Hearns get in the ring in his yellow satin trunks with the word "KRONK" on his waistband. Man, those were great days in boxing. It sure ain't like that anymore. Too bad to lose another piece of boxing history.
posted by Desert Dog at 11:23 AM on November 30
What the hell are they supposed to do? Drive-throughs have signs that they don't serve walk-ups. Jeez!
posted by Desert Dog at 06:33 PM on November 24
Aren't all the Maple Leafs gay?
posted by Desert Dog at 05:28 PM on November 24
I was born in Columbus forty-something years ago and have always been a Buckeye. I haven't missed a game since I was 3. It's always been the highlight of the season for me and my family. This game, not just tomorrow, but as long as they have been playing each other, is more than a rivalry. It's part of people's lives. People from Ohio and Michigan realize this. And I'm not disrespecting all the other great rivalries in college football, but Ohio State-Michigan is what college football is all about. Tomorrow's game will be a great game, I have no doubt. And I hope the Buckeyes lay it on the Wolverines. But as much as I hate Michigan, I'm thankful for them, too. Without Michigan, this week wouldn't hold the tradition and the memories I have of different years with different family members. I get to watch the game tomorrow with my Dad, so it will be another chance I have to stash away a memory. But if, God forbid, Michigan beats the Buckeyes tomorrow, I'll be OK with it. Because I know Bo had something to do with it.
posted by Desert Dog at 02:48 PM on November 17
I got this strategy I use. When my opponent lays down rock, I throw down some paper. BOOYAA! What up now? You want some of that? HUH? Yeah, I know. That's some brilliant shit right there.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:08 PM on November 11
I personally like the tape on his mouth and the vise. That may shut him up. Or maybe he should try the tape on his hands!
posted by Desert Dog at 11:09 AM on November 10
I guess the Jag's go 1-1 this week.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:08 PM on October 26
Back then is when the heavyweight division had this glow about it. When there was a heavyweight championship coming up, you could feel the electricity in the air, and I never had the fortune to attend one in person. I was just a kid, but when Ali was fighting or Frazier was fighting or Foreman was fighting, man, it was exciting! The heavyweight division has been watered-down since those larger-than-life personalities moved on. From reading Smokin' Joe's autobiography, I agree with the author of this story about Frazier being hurt by Ali. When Ali called Joe a gorilla, it seemed to hit Joe hard. He couldn't understand why Ali would be so vicious, not knowing Ali was in pre-fight hype mode. Hope Joe lives the rest of his life in peace. He seems like a good man.
posted by Desert Dog at 01:17 PM on October 18
Just comment on the game. I would imagine there are a lot of people watching the game. Why would anyone say anything that could possibly be construed as being offensive to people of any race, sex, religion or whatever? Not a bright thing to do. Whether society is over-sensitive or not, that's just the way it is. You have to be careful what you say.
posted by Desert Dog at 05:51 PM on October 14
Equating a sheep to human life, you say? A good sheep can be a man's wife, kid or lover. You best watch yer mouf, boy. And you sure do have a perty mouf.
posted by Desert Dog at 09:57 AM on October 14
At least they killed the sheep before they sexually assaulted it.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:38 PM on October 13
I thought the article was funny. Imagine MJ and Charles Oakley coaching the Ryder Cup team. Oakley intimidating Sergio, funny me thinks! And thanks yerfatma. That proves Tiger is a greedy non-giving SOB!
posted by Desert Dog at 09:29 PM on October 12
posted by Desert Dog at 04:05 PM on October 06
Sounds like an average night for me. Go to the strip club, like the Bada-Bing, hang with my boys, get in a fight, get hit by a car and pop off a couple rounds. THAT'S how I roll!
posted by Desert Dog at 03:57 PM on October 06
I've been playing for about 8 years now. And I'm completely addicted. I shoot in the 80's and have yet to record an ace. I wish now that I would have become addicted to heroin instead of golf. It would probably be cheaper and less frustrating!
posted by Desert Dog at 12:46 PM on October 04
True jerseygirl, but a police department or sheriff's department should be above basically name calling. A police department, regardless of it's location or size, is a professional organization and should act in a professional manner at all times.
posted by Desert Dog at 07:26 PM on September 29
When the press release came from the Dallas PD and called TO that fancy little football person and said the officers are 10 times better than him, I couldn't believe it. You would think that a Dallas PD rep would be a little more professional than that. Completely classless statement.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:50 PM on September 29
I thought there was something funny about that person who picks up my trash. Just what I least expected, one of those wacky guy/girls! That explains why that person checks my wife out and then checks ME out. I thought they were just bi. Bishop, your insight has cleared up many of my questions.
posted by Desert Dog at 05:19 PM on September 28
But really, other than the fact that Spadafora put three slugs in his fiance's chest, he's probably a pretty good guy! And then she MARRIES him. And yeah Bishop, way to take gradys comments literally. Dude, lighten up.
posted by Desert Dog at 02:59 PM on September 28
The Bucks win by 10.
posted by Desert Dog at 03:30 PM on September 07
posted by Desert Dog at 11:14 AM on August 25
At least Holyfield let his hands go this time. His previous few fights, he couldn't even do that. He says it's because he was hurt. I know one thing-I'm 43 like him and I sure as hell wouldn't get in the ring with him!
posted by Desert Dog at 11:15 AM on August 19
Boxing fiasco's like this give the UFC all the more power.
posted by Desert Dog at 09:49 AM on August 12
An article on ESPN.com reported Clarett was to play for the Youngstown Hitmen in the wildly popular Eastern Indoor Football League. The moron who coaches the 'Hitmen' said they'll wait and see what happens with Clarett and said, "I've seen far worse situations than this." The Hitmen. Seriously. What are some of the other teams in the league called? The Rapists? The Arsonists? The Molesters? Jeez!
posted by Desert Dog at 01:52 PM on August 09
I'm a Cowboys fan and I would love to see Tiki retire. But I'm also a football fan and I appreciate seeing a great running back do his thing. I don't think it's time for him to hang 'em up yet. J-E-T-S! Y-E-A-H R-I-G-H-T!
posted by Desert Dog at 11:17 PM on July 29
I'm glad the Reds don't have to face Lee this weekend.
posted by Desert Dog at 12:35 PM on July 28
WHEN CAN WE ALL SIGN UP FOR NEXT YEAR?:(
posted by Desert Dog at 02:27 PM on July 26
Damn, I miss hockey.
posted by Desert Dog at 04:26 PM on July 22
Yeah. And what the fuck does Brad Pitt know anyways?
posted by Desert Dog at 05:20 PM on July 21
That's dead fucking horse ;O
posted by Desert Dog at 03:14 PM on July 16
lbb, I don't think anyone can equate losing a loved one, that is a person, to losing an animal. Before I had my boys, I loved my 2 dogs tremendously. Now, I still love my dogs, but it's not nearly the same as my sons. I understand many people out there only have a dog or cat or whatever as their only companion. It's sad, I see it everyday on my job. But comparing people's sarcasm on this post about a horse some rich people own to us not caring about sending good vibes when a person loses a child is off base and kind of calloused. I've seen numerous fatal car accidents that have killed people young and old and rich and poor. A horse or a dog or any animal dying just can't be compared. So if my joking around or the term "fucking horse' makes me look like an asshole, that's just the way it is.
posted by Desert Dog at 06:48 PM on July 15
Oh...and what Weedy said.
posted by Desert Dog at 02:00 PM on July 15
Damn. We've all been trumped.
posted by Desert Dog at 06:27 PM on July 14
Chico, believe me, I get where you're coming from. Some SpoFi's take everything they read on here literally. It's funny. People getting all bent out of shape because I used the term 'fucking horse'. I don't wish the horse was dead or in pain or the such. So people, don't get your little hearts all flustered. I was just messing around. And, Drood, your mother.
posted by Desert Dog at 05:18 PM on July 14
I thought Mir looked slow and out-of-shape. I was looking forward to seeing him fight, but I was disappointed. I'd like to see Brandon Vera get a shot at Sylvia. He would try to take Sylvia down to the ground. I don't think he would want to stand with Sylvia. I heard Hughes might fight St. Pierre in September. Anybody hear that rumor?
posted by Desert Dog at 04:23 PM on July 14
Oh, pissing in the punch. Punch-pisser. I get it. Clever. As far as me being dumb, well, I've been called many things in my life. Usually the people calling other people dumb have some problems themselves. But it's OK, Mr. bat. I was trying to be a little sarcastic. I can see how you might get the two confused. Pleasant day, lbb. Thanks, CB900. You are right. If he pulls through, he might be a fucking horse.
posted by Desert Dog at 04:09 PM on July 14
Chico, he's not a big fella. Ben Roethlisberger is a big fella. It's a fucking horse. That horse has no idea he has all these 'well-wishers.' He doesn't give a crap. Probably the only thing that horse feels is hunger and pain. The only thing the horse wants is to eat and not feel pain. And lbb, I don't know what a punch-pisser is. Good vibes to all. Be sure and send Barbaro a get-well card. I'm sure he'll really appreciate it.
posted by Desert Dog at 02:46 PM on July 14
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