Recent Comments by Turbo

What would it take to ride one of these?

I would do it only if I got to wear Jessica Alba's undercarriage on my face like a feed sack while I was ridding the wave.

posted by Turbo at 07:07 AM on February 08, 2006

Woods beats Els in playoff to win Dubai Classic

$3 million for showing up and $2.5 million for winning. Even if had lost he still would have won for the weekend.

posted by Turbo at 08:28 AM on February 06, 2006

Most Valuable Players Wanted More Valuable Paycheck

I think $100,000 is a little much, but I also think $1,000 is not that much, especially when the NFL is a cash cow.

posted by Turbo at 08:24 AM on February 06, 2006

Who cares what YOU believe, Mikey?

"He didn't do anything wrong. The world will all know when the truth comes out." The same goes for Saddam.

posted by Turbo at 08:12 AM on January 26, 2006

Hoiberg Shows Heart

Just wait until Vegas is betting on which game he dies in.

posted by Turbo at 10:08 AM on January 23, 2006

Duke Defeats North Carolina, 3,688-3,444

Rickmon Logan aka the Kobe of Noth Carolina was the leading scorer with 652 points! That means he probably shot aroung 1,200 shots.

posted by Turbo at 09:24 AM on January 17, 2006

Mangini taking Flight to NJ

New England and New York share coaches like OJ and Marcus Allen share women. Hopefully Mangini does not get slashed to bits.

posted by Turbo at 08:09 AM on January 17, 2006

Top Naked People in Sports in 2005

I bet Sophie Sandolo is beating off big mullet, flannel wearing, Ford Ranger driving, LPGA fan with a giant stick.

posted by Turbo at 04:10 PM on January 13, 2006

idiot's

I love people that use more than one !!!!!!!! Oh, damn he must be serious since he used!!!!!!!!

posted by Turbo at 09:18 AM on January 13, 2006

Doctor: Palmer knee injury 'potentially career-ending'

Palmer does not need knees, he could throw 60 yard fade passes out of a wheel chair. He will be back.

posted by Turbo at 07:20 AM on January 13, 2006

First Jet Powered "Birdman" Human Skydiver

I want to see those boots added in skeleton racing.

posted by Turbo at 08:23 AM on January 10, 2006

Urlacher named AP Defensive Player of the Year

What about Vasher, sorry I am still on my UT buzz.

posted by Turbo at 03:35 PM on January 06, 2006

Vince Young leads Texas to 41-38 win over USC

Reggie Bush was the 3rd best player on the field last night. He lost millions, Matt lost millions and Vince made millions if he leaves. Vince is 5 for 5 on fourth quarter combacks, it was nothing new to texas fans, they have seen it before.

posted by Turbo at 10:54 AM on January 05, 2006

Phil "The Power" Taylor wins his 13th World Darts Title

It is a sport. A sport with a beer in one hand, or a plate of nachos, and lets not forget the fact that you have the smoke in the eyes thing going.

posted by Turbo at 12:18 PM on January 03, 2006

Russian Heavyweight Valuev Returns Champion’s Belt to Ruiz

He should have turned it into a pinky ring.

posted by Turbo at 04:51 AM on December 23, 2005

Boxer Valuev Wins Russia’s First World Heavyweight Title

That dude looks like george the aninmal steel on stilts.

posted by Turbo at 12:09 PM on December 19, 2005

Now that's a tailgate party!

Is the champagne room the 2 by 2 pisser?

posted by Turbo at 04:04 PM on November 29, 2005

Michael Irvin Arrested

Lets see if Dan Patrick will still suck Irvins pipe, errrrrr kiss his ass.

posted by Turbo at 08:04 AM on November 28, 2005

NFL tries to sell to women

No way on the ff stat.

posted by Turbo at 07:18 PM on November 27, 2005

Fan who took ball from Favre gets probation

I have $200 and some free time. I would love to take the football away from Farve. Although it would be easier if I played for the Vikings secondary.

posted by Turbo at 04:03 PM on November 23, 2005

Is Reggie Bush #1 draft choice calaber?

What would you do with Davis, who just signed a big contract?

posted by Turbo at 09:19 AM on November 23, 2005

Muhammed Ali feels the love of Louisville

When asked about what he thought about the Muhammed Ali Center, Ali said, " AHHH UGGGGG PPPHHHHH DAAAAAA" and then spit on himself.

posted by Turbo at 03:01 PM on November 21, 2005

Seeking a refund from Mr. Rogers

I did not realize that when I started playing football in seventh grade that I was already 12 years behind a lot of kids.

posted by Turbo at 02:55 PM on November 21, 2005

The Hit That Changed a Career

I was 8 and that was my first memory of the NFL.

posted by Turbo at 05:24 PM on November 18, 2005

McNabb might be going ... groin ... gone:

Should I post my post again?

posted by Turbo at 05:19 PM on November 18, 2005

Now what?

Nomowasteourtimeguy

posted by Turbo at 09:17 AM on November 18, 2005

McNabb might be going ... groin ... gone

Why is Philadelphia going to beat the crap out of McMahon? AAAAAHHHHHHOOOOOO Goood Buddy, Yes AH AH AH, YOU ARE CORRECT SIR!

posted by Turbo at 04:47 PM on November 17, 2005

Jesse Jackson meets with T.O.

I think JJ will bring justice to the suffering (TO). JJ always thinks about what he is getting into (women besides his wife). And is known for giving great knowledge. And the Rev. JJ once said "One thing I know, negroes can drive cars fast," How can you doubt this guy?

posted by Turbo at 04:33 PM on November 14, 2005

Many Fine Returns

Could Sharper be a pro bowler with just one game?

posted by Turbo at 03:18 PM on November 14, 2005

Longest touchdown in NFL history

Sorry, I guess it would help to read the whole article. Nevermind.

posted by Turbo at 10:22 AM on November 14, 2005

Longest touchdown in NFL history

I would have sworn that Chris McAllister returned a FG 108 on Monday night about two years ago? Remember and on the run back Ray Lewis lit someone up. Maybe it was 107?

posted by Turbo at 10:19 AM on November 14, 2005

Who's your Sportsman of the Year?

As a cowboy fan it has to be TO.

posted by Turbo at 12:56 PM on November 13, 2005

Former Steelers' lineman Steve Courson

This story makes me realize that I just do not care about my dog as much as Steve cared about his.

posted by Turbo at 08:39 PM on November 12, 2005

A Black Cultural Fiction?

Did he get the crap kicked out of him before he took that picture or is that knot on his forehead permanent?

posted by Turbo at 12:46 PM on November 11, 2005

A Black Cultural Fiction?

Yao Ming should start a company selling merchandise from the old chinatown league that spanned the 40's and the 50's in Mexico?

posted by Turbo at 12:23 PM on November 11, 2005

NFL to return to LA...sometime...somewhere...somehow...

They would have to have a dome stadium. The celebs and porn stars and whoever else lives out there would not want to get hot, or cold, or have their hair blow around during a game. I would love to see 80,000 people looking around for celebs and not wathcing the game. I smell true fan base.

posted by Turbo at 09:25 AM on November 11, 2005

Am I the only one still fascinated by Tyson?

Mike Tyson's best quote ever “[He] called me a ‘rapist’ and a ‘recluse.’ I’m not a recluse.”

posted by Turbo at 07:28 PM on November 10, 2005

Beatpaths

Stephen Hawkings craps on beatpaths.

posted by Turbo at 04:04 PM on November 10, 2005

Hope you drafted Larry Johnson, too...

Two years ago I could have had LT as my keeper. Suck it.

posted by Turbo at 06:05 PM on November 09, 2005

Pete Rose, Jr. pleads guilty to drug trafficking.

If only his dad had a way to make some quick cash to bail him out???????

posted by Turbo at 03:21 PM on November 07, 2005

Arab players break fast because of their love of soccer

They should have just set off a few car bombs right before the game to delay it a bit.

posted by Turbo at 03:21 PM on October 31, 2005

The Million Dollar Kick

$21,000 will go a long way for the average Canadian. He probably still lives with his parents and is sober like 3 days out of the year.

posted by Turbo at 03:29 PM on October 28, 2005

Latin Legends team announced.

I am typing this (right now)

posted by Turbo at 09:07 PM on October 26, 2005

Hard-Core Cubs Fan Dies After Sox Win Pennant

She probably got murdered do to looting and other white sox fan antics.

posted by Turbo at 11:19 AM on October 26, 2005

"Sexuality and gender don't change anyone's performance on the court."

A gay female athlete. Well knock me over with a feather, I am shocked. I must admit that when they do not wear flannel shirts and drive around in there little Ford Rangers it is hard for me to pick up on their sexuality.

posted by Turbo at 07:55 AM on October 26, 2005

Say It Ain't So, Jackie

Originally Minute Maid Park had plans for a burning cross out on that hill in center field, but then they realized that Minute Maid Park was actually in the inner city so they decided against it.

posted by Turbo at 10:04 PM on October 25, 2005

The Hoser Picks, NFL Week 7

Way to pick that Dolphins / Chiefs game after the game.

posted by Turbo at 08:59 AM on October 22, 2005

If nobody gets crippled, it'll be a miracle...

They should have Ted Williams frozen head compete against somebody.

posted by Turbo at 08:12 PM on October 20, 2005

Cheerleading is Not a Sport

Have yall seen "Bring it on"? I think that sums it up.

posted by Turbo at 03:03 PM on October 20, 2005

Serving Larry Bird

Think about it, he is getting 3 more years of sweet butt lovin. That Larry Bird thing was just a decoy.

posted by Turbo at 01:26 PM on October 20, 2005

Kids: Please make sure you get a parent or adult to help you with this activity

Would people get Yao Ming confused with Frankenstein?

posted by Turbo at 02:03 PM on October 19, 2005

Kids: Please make sure you get a parent or adult to help you with this activity

They need one for Shawn Kemp. They would make a ton of money when he buys one each for his kids.

posted by Turbo at 10:35 AM on October 19, 2005

He's disgracing my family name!

Haven't they used 3 consecutive #1 picks on receivers (drug suspensions aside)? Dear Yerfatma, Yes they did get 3 first round draft pick WR's and they did get a big name Tight End. You see I was trying to, nevermind you would not understand.

posted by Turbo at 04:01 PM on October 18, 2005

He's disgracing my family name!

A RECIEVER, he needs at least 3 and they should have gone out and got him a big named Tight End.

posted by Turbo at 02:03 PM on October 18, 2005

No Adidas.

Jimmy Johnson

posted by Turbo at 01:07 PM on October 18, 2005

Seahawks secondary takes a hit.

Where was Ray Lewis last night?

posted by Turbo at 09:29 PM on October 17, 2005

A-Rod's mom: Uncle's death affected performance

A-Rods uncle use to drink lots of Pepsi.

posted by Turbo at 10:04 AM on October 17, 2005

Jaguars Cheerleader Escaped Murder Plot

Note to self when trying to kidnap someone. If they do not answer the door break in through the air conditioner? I may have watched too many movies, but I thought you were suppose to break a small window by the door, or pick a lock. Could you imagine all the stupid stuff they would have done by the time they got to Miami?

posted by Turbo at 03:23 PM on October 14, 2005

Nike marketing soccer outside the 'burbs

I heard they are going to pass out orange slices in inner city schools?

posted by Turbo at 12:48 PM on October 12, 2005

Love....exciting and new.

Is this part of Mike Tice righting the ship? Or was that riding the ship?

posted by Turbo at 12:43 PM on October 12, 2005