Recent Comments by beaverboard

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Proud to say that I don't know who many of the characters in that uberfan rogues gallery are.

But Mallory Edens is only a prosthetic Adam's apple and some raccoon warpaint away from being able to go trick or treating as Ann Coulter.

posted by beaverboard at 10:35 AM on October 23

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Between yesterday's Tigers game and today's Rams game, Missouri is currently the special teams capital of the US.

posted by beaverboard at 04:05 PM on October 19

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

I watched the end of the Muschamp era in brief snippets. Every time I checked on the game, the Mizzou defense or special teams had just scored again.

posted by beaverboard at 10:51 PM on October 18

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Ryan is a very fortunate man. I get offered extensions every day via email, but at least there's a reasonable explanation for why I'm receiving those offers.

posted by beaverboard at 02:02 PM on October 18

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

I always liked how Sparky Anderson handled his Reds bullpen in the mid-70s. Without a staff of dominating starters who threw a ton of innings, he went to his pen whenever and in all types of situations.

His relievers didn't rack up a massive amount of saves, but they were involved in a significant number of decisions, and posted a noteworthy number of wins, with the top guy having a W-L record equivalent to the number 4 or 5 starter (and with a lower ERA to boot). Being able to field an insane everyday lineup of Bench, Perez, Rose, Foster etc. created a lot of latter inning plate production, which made it all possible.

But some of those Cincy pitchers could hit pretty good too...

posted by beaverboard at 03:12 PM on October 17

Was Belichick to New England the Best Deal in NFL History?

Great reading - even though the SI site is woefully restless and volatile at times. (It's like trying to read a comic book that has ADHD.)

I always thought that it was Belichick's Cleveland experience that turned him into the lovable, carefree person he is today. Good to learn that he was the Sheriff of Taciturn County from the get go. (Which doesn't make Modell any less of a schmuck).

And as for think you know everything about him that you need to know, and then you learn more, and it all just adds to the legend.

posted by beaverboard at 08:29 AM on October 17

Royals Advance to First World Series Since 1985

The only part missing from the script is that they won't be facing the Pirates in the Series. That would have been the ultimate "return from eternal irrelevance" matchup.

I similarly yearn for a Browns - Lions Super Bowl.

I watched every minute of the 1985 Series. I can still hear Al Michaels announcing Balboni and Biancalana with a tone of incredulity in his voice as they stepped up to the plate, BEFORE they defied the law of averages and prevailing wisdom with yet another timely and productive at bat.

Felt very happy for Dick Howser after how he had been treated by Steinbrenner, and felt awful for Herzog having to watch his team fall apart in game 7.

With the memories so vivid, it's sometimes hard to remember how long ago that Series took place. Three days after it ended, the space shuttle Challenger took off on a mission...and returned safely to Earth (for the last time).

posted by beaverboard at 10:23 AM on October 16

"How Rebounds Work"

Is there a system for tracking Dennis Rodman's off-court spatial relationships and rebound locations?

posted by beaverboard at 04:23 PM on October 15

Drone with Flag Sparks Brawl at Euro 2016 Match

This is the Balkan version of Iko Iko. Despite the fact that the Serbs being pissed off predates the founding of New Orleans by around 325 years.

posted by beaverboard at 11:59 PM on October 14

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

When indoor ice rinks first came to South Florida in the late 60's/early 70's, the kids discovered that after a resurfacing, the Zamboni drove out into the parking lot to dump its load on the tarmac. The hellacious ice ball fights that ensued became the main event for many people. It was the first time some folks had seen frozen water other than at a saloon. You had to fight fast, because the pile went down in a hurry.

People eventually lost interest in the rink itself because you could slip and fall down unless you knew what you were doing. That ice surface was harder than people thought it would be.

Nothing like watching people try to get up a head of steam on skates knowing they were going to go down, so they could go into a full body glide before slamming into the boards. Tropical luge. Not always feet first. (The money for the MacArthur grants comes from Florida. But the recipients generally don't.)

But oh my, it was so nice and cool in there compared to the wall of steam outside.

Attendance at the general public skate sessions was about equal to what the Panthers game looked like it pulled in.

posted by beaverboard at 03:06 PM on October 14

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

After watching him get carried into the end zone like a rodeo clown, I'd love to ask Richard Sherman whether or not he thinks DeMarco Murray matters in this league.

Except that I think the line for that forms behind Skip Bayless.

posted by beaverboard at 10:45 AM on October 13

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

If there is any local, regional or college radio audio feed of the fourth quarter of the TCU - Baylor game available, I want to listen to it. Bingo, bango, bongo.

posted by beaverboard at 10:34 AM on October 12

Florida QB Treon Harris Investigated in Alleged Sex Assault

I can picture someone in Tallahassee saying "Their guy goes out and does whatever our guy gets up on a table and tells him to do".

posted by beaverboard at 09:42 AM on October 07

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Cowboys are halfway to eight wins after just five games. They might be going places. My head's starting to spin a little.

posted by beaverboard at 04:58 PM on October 05

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

On a historic results basis, today would be a good day to count to two Mississippi.

posted by beaverboard at 07:57 PM on October 04

Why no one wants to host the 2022 Olympics

If Lyle Alzado were alive, he'd tell you that Cossack Stan is a guy who tends bar at a joint near the airport in Cleveland. His English is pretty good. He splits weekends with a guy named Al Kaider.

posted by beaverboard at 01:01 PM on October 03

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

From a special USA Today dispatch:

"Madison Bumgarner was dominate on the mound and tossed a shutout. He struck out 10 batters on 109 pitches".

A virtual newsroom teaming with prominate writers.

Maybe this doesn't resonant with most people. I'm content to be the lone dissonate voice. Even though I could be driven from my home and career and forced to become a mendicate. Maybe get arrested for indigent exposure.

posted by beaverboard at 04:23 AM on October 02

Brady Hoke's Dangerous Incompetence So Bad ESPN Announcers Denounce It

Looks like there was a bit of a rally at UM about this.

posted by beaverboard at 11:15 PM on September 30

Brady Hoke's Dangerous Incompetence So Bad ESPN Announcers Denounce It

The NFL must be working hard to keep UM from hiring John Harbaugh.

1) As long as he stays with the Ravens, he can't come out and tell his side of the Rice story in its entirety. Which would likely not make the team or the league look good.

2) The league hungers for compelling themes to coin revenue from. If they lose one of the Harbaughs and Peyton retires, the NFL will be toast in the brotherly love cash cow department. Somehow, Rob and Rex Ryan just don't pull the same numbers (or heart strings) on the Hallmark scale.

(If UM fires Brandon and then Hoke, hopefully the biology professor at the top won't notice that Charlie Weis is now available).

posted by beaverboard at 09:52 AM on September 30

Brady Hoke's Dangerous Incompetence So Bad ESPN Announcers Denounce It

Pretty darn well delineated Peter principle threshold on Hoke's career track. He did pretty well at his previous stops. He can probably use metrics to figure out where he should go next without exceeding his competency quotient after he gets canned at UM. Aim only as high as is reasonably appropriate. He's gonna get hired somewhere. He doesn't necessarily have to settle for a UTEP level gig.

UM must be writhing a bit. Premature to write them off as a relevant major program, and they've seen other schools crawl back from the precipice with solid hires, such as Bama and OSU. They need to nail the next HC decision. They can't lose to Columbus indefinitely. Lloyd Carr will end up trading swag for tats.

posted by beaverboard at 09:20 PM on September 29

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Thinking of the possible captioning for that photo, hard to know whether to go with the Reddick or the South Effingham angle.

posted by beaverboard at 05:11 PM on September 29

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Cowboys win the Lee Harvey Oswald Invitational at home for the first time in over 20 years.

They compete for the Rcade Cup in early November in Jacksonville in a contest that should prove to be a gut-wrenching test of long standing loyalties.

posted by beaverboard at 08:36 AM on September 29

33 Short Stories about 33

Loved it when McHale broke Bird's team scoring record with a 56 point night and Bird said he should have gone for 60. Then Bird goes out and scores 60 himself a few nights later.

In a small New Orleans college gym no less. Love those huge games in obscure facilities. At least there was footage of Bird's accomplishment, unlike Wilt's 100 in Hershey, PA.

Also, Kevin Gamble loved the rims at the old Garden and said that he hoped that they would be brought over to the new building. Because they were apparently forgiving. Bird said something to the effect of that if your shot was hitting the net, it wouldn't matter how helpful the rims were.

posted by beaverboard at 08:18 AM on September 27

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Who put the scotch bonnet in the NY Giants' decaf?

posted by beaverboard at 07:32 AM on September 26

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

North Texas up 49-3 at halftime - this just ain't right. Cain't feel good. Can it?

posted by beaverboard at 05:13 PM on September 20

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

I was hoping that Bayless and Smith would invest in a Heart Attack Grill franchise.

Or maybe that Superhead would open a Five Guys.

posted by beaverboard at 03:45 PM on September 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

October is going to be an interesting month for the NFL. That's when the Susan B. Komen Foundation BCA gloves, shoes, and other accessories usually appear. Will the foundation want to continue having a comprehensive relationship with the league under the present circumstances?

Ironically, two and half years ago, the pink shoe was on the other foot.

If the NFL had half a brain, they would have an office that did nothing but overpump any positive league or player related story they could get their hands on. With at least half as much effort as they put into money counting, merchandising, and game day presentation.

posted by beaverboard at 08:08 AM on September 18

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

If it wasn't tough enough already to be associated with Rutgers and to be pained and embarrassed by one Rice after another, the university once again covered itself in scarlet glory this past weekend as the football team made its Big 10 debut against Penn State in front of a record home crowd.

Some fans felt compelled to wear shirts that read "Beat Ped State", forcing Rutgers AD Julie "The Shame Whisperer" Hermann to issue a public apology to address the widespread outcry against the tasteless display.

Add former coach Schiano's track record and reputation to the mix and it's no wonder that Robert Kraft's Patriots are always on the lookout for more players from the crucible of high character in Piscataway.

posted by beaverboard at 08:35 AM on September 16

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

This week's exponent of Newton's Law: Chad Henne, who was his team's leading passer AND rusher today.

Package of fig cookies getting airdropped to Everbank Field.

posted by beaverboard at 06:10 PM on September 14

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Practice safe socks
And don't smoke weed
Or you will be broke
And out of the league

posted by beaverboard at 09:16 AM on September 12

Video of Ray Rice Elevator Punch on Partner Released

If I have the chronology right, Goodell was frantically playing catchup when the league suspended Rice "indefinitely", since the Ravens had terminated his contract a short time before that.

Interesting that Goodell felt compelled to somehow appear decisive ASAP in this case, yet didn't move a muscle when the Patriots similarly terminated Hernandez, and still hasn't made a pronouncement on Hernandez' official league status as far as I know. Despite mounting evidence, three murder charges, and the passage of many months.

Part of me wants Goodell gone tonight, and part of me wants him to hang around just a bit longer, as I can't think of anyone better suited to preside over the eventual induction of Ray Lewis to the HOF.

posted by beaverboard at 09:15 PM on September 11

Video of Ray Rice Elevator Punch on Partner Released

Awaiting a vote of confidence or two in Goodell from the likes of Snyder, Hunt, or Haslam, which should seal the deal.

posted by beaverboard at 08:36 PM on September 10

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

That's because the broadcaster has already seen Tyson get his.

posted by beaverboard at 08:10 PM on September 10

Area Man Buys Bills for $1B

With Trump being outbid on this, one can imagine what the pricing will be like the next time a franchise that catches his eye becomes available.

posted by beaverboard at 08:28 PM on September 09

Sea of 49ers Red at Cowboys Stadium

It'll be interesting to see what the crowd looks like when the Saints and Texans come to town in the next few weeks.

posted by beaverboard at 11:42 AM on September 09

Video of Ray Rice Elevator Punch on Partner Released

The league might as well answer the question of who knew what and when regarding this video, because either the media, law enforcement, or attorneys will have it reconstructed and spelled out before long.

Please, no one ask John Harbaugh for his thoughts on this. Heard enough from him already.

As popular and successful as the NFL still is, there are moments when I think that this league is not that far removed from going into a public perception tailspin that no amount of pink ribbons and shoes, shows of support for the military, and community service youth programs would be able to overcome.

posted by beaverboard at 03:24 PM on September 08

Video of Ray Rice Elevator Punch on Partner Released

TMZ has put up enhanced camera footage of the Ray Rice fiance knockout filmed inside the elevator. It does not look good.

posted by beaverboard at 08:28 AM on September 08

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

That runback is in the Steelers special team playbook. It's called "Juke Jump deJong".

posted by beaverboard at 07:20 AM on September 08

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

When a-fool-and-his-money Lou Gorman felt compelled to bring Danny Darwin to Boston and triple his salary, the press asked Darwin how he felt about his new contract.

His answer: "Now I can finally add another bathroom onto my parents' house, which I've been wanting to do for a long time".

He couldn't finance a north Texas bathroom on the 1.2 million he had earned the year before. What, he shopped for the fixtures in Saudi Arabia? They had to frack the backyard to put in the Jacuzzi?

posted by beaverboard at 10:22 PM on September 02

New Yorker: The Twilight of Baseball

Everyone in the shirtcocking crowd at Burning Man seemed to know who Greg Oden was.

posted by beaverboard at 09:20 PM on August 31

St. Louis Rams Release Michael Sam

I think the NFL should allow him to be assigned to each of Cleveland's opponents on a rotational basis so he can help run Manziel out of the league as quickly as possible.

posted by beaverboard at 06:39 PM on August 30

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

I'm pretty sure that the pitcher in the third graphic is Calvin Schiraldi.

posted by beaverboard at 06:25 PM on August 30

Weird Penalty Called on Vanderbilt Jersey

Ill-stated statements absolved by well-parsed parchment.

posted by beaverboard at 05:30 PM on August 29

Roger Goodell Figures Out Domestic Violence is Bad

The thing is still out of whack. He's only adding four weeks to what he gave Rice.

If strike two is banishment, then strike one ought to at least be a season. Coach Payton got tossed for a year because he knew that his guys were going after other oversize, highly trained men in helmets and pads during the heat of battle.

posted by beaverboard at 03:21 PM on August 29

Annual Patriots trade key piece right before season move

The joke that Greg Maddux tells his friends after he's had a few pops is that Belichick got stopped doing 110 on the interstate with a trunk full of Scarlet Knights.

Apparently, Belichick was so grimly alert and aware of his surroundings that he broke the field sobriety test equipment.

posted by beaverboard at 12:09 AM on August 27

Annual Patriots trade key piece right before season move

The Belichick-Schiano love connection transcends all administrative transitions.

posted by beaverboard at 03:10 PM on August 26

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

I have asked the government to issue me a dollar for every reference I can find to Florida coach Will Muschamp being on the hot seat, and they are considering my proposal. If they approve the request, I'll be the second coming of Jed Clampett.

Generous food and beverage vouchers for all my fellow SpoFites hang in the balance. Call your congressperson.

posted by beaverboard at 09:46 PM on August 24

Men in Blazers Move to NBC Sports

They've been following the US History category on Jeopardy. Which helped them come up with Lewis and Clark instead of Sacco and Vanzetti.

Soccerjaw weigh in.

posted by beaverboard at 04:18 PM on August 17

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

posted by beaverboard at 11:31 AM on August 13

Tony Stewart Kills Driver in Dirt-Track Race

As hincandenza said, if Stewart's mama owns a piano, Ward's family is gonna end up with it.

posted by beaverboard at 02:23 PM on August 11

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Dang, Sergio's pretty well down the leaderboard at the PGA. I was hoping for another chapter in the Affirmed-Alydar saga he's been scripting with McIlroy of late.

Fowler is not far back though, and has recently had a notable go of it with McIlroy as well.

posted by beaverboard at 04:13 PM on August 08

Donovan to Retire at the end of this MLS season

To bad the players on the MNT couldn't have agreed to leave the #10 shirt unassigned for the WC, but FIFA regs required that the number be assigned.

posted by beaverboard at 12:21 PM on August 08

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Artest is going to get Chad Johnson re-stoked to do something Latinumerical again.

I'm just going to call the Ron the Malice man Elbow Noodle Bamboo.

Ramen Speed!

posted by beaverboard at 08:03 PM on August 07

Hunter Pence signs are going viral.

This happens to be a particularly fucked up day at my small end of the world and I have to say that seeing the sign about Pence's Sharknado insurance did me more good than any econo jug of discount wine could possibly do.

Medicinal Mini Haha for real.

posted by beaverboard at 12:49 PM on August 07

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Westbrook was a liability at first. It might have gotten overlooked a bit because the team was just moving and getting resettled, etc.

posted by beaverboard at 08:29 AM on August 06

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Re: NFL tactics -

As Table Three shows, games lost to injury have risen steadily over four years

That's putting it mildly. Injuries are up 20% in 4 years, with an almost 10% jump from 2010 to 2011 alone.

posted by beaverboard at 12:55 PM on August 05

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

The City of 'Notherly Love

posted by beaverboard at 11:25 AM on August 05

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Wonder what a Bubby Brister in his prime would be worth right now. I'll bet he does too.

posted by beaverboard at 02:39 PM on August 04

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

I should go to google images to see if the primary search results for "sleeveless tank top T-shirt" have changed from Marlon Brando to Ray Rice.

posted by beaverboard at 10:30 PM on August 03

NFL Players Will Have Tracking Chips in Shoulder Pads

Ochocinco once desperately wanted to double up as a soccer player while he was still a starting NFL wideout. He has some skills and lots of enthusiasm, but from what I could tell, he was miles away from being able to roster up with a MLS team, and was too deep into his athletic prime to have the time needed to train his way up to major league pro soccer viability.

However, he might already have international level capability in the foul exaggerating and goal celebrating departments.

posted by beaverboard at 10:21 PM on August 03