Recent Comments by beaverboard

Bills' move to Nathan Peterman is a disaster

Too bad for LeSean McCoy. He was trying hard to compensate by racking up 20 rushing yards per INT in the first half, but there's no competing with a turnover machine like Peterman. (Or Dak for that matter.)

LeSean must wonder what life might be like if he'd been able to outlast the Doughboy in Philly. He might be on that high flying Eagles roster right now, having the time of his life.

posted by beaverboard at 11:44 AM on November 20

Bills' move to Nathan Peterman is a disaster

Peterman is somewhat fortunate. His self-destruction took place in front of only 20,000 people.

posted by beaverboard at 01:51 AM on November 20

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

The Nigerian women's bobsled team, starting from scratch with a wooden sled they made themselves, and progressing with the help of crowdfunding, has qualified for the Olympics.

posted by beaverboard at 06:39 PM on November 19

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

This halftime sports update just in from the 19th Century edition of the Frontier Messenger:

"North Texas in shootout with Army "

posted by beaverboard at 08:17 PM on November 18

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Unrepentant mother and child murder mastermind Charles Manson is close to death in a prison hospital.

Unrepentant mother and (almost) child murder mastermind Rae Carruth will be released from prison in less than a year.

posted by beaverboard at 05:35 PM on November 17

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Petitioning the league ASAP to let the Steelers wear their uniforms from last night for all future games, home and away. Baddest ass sets ever. What chance is a powder blue pastel team going to have against a look like that? It's like Lee Van Cleef and Shaft against the Smurfs.

posted by beaverboard at 12:34 PM on November 17

U.S. May Host New World Soccer Tournament

As a nod to the Lanterne Rouge, they can call it the Lanterne D'Or and design a trophy accordingly.

Which reminds me - I've seen worse looking trophies than the WC trophy, but the damn thing still looks like something that was done in 4th grade ceramics class when the clay started to stiffen up and then sprayed with aerosol paint. You can buy knickknacks like that for short money out on the boulevard.

posted by beaverboard at 11:50 AM on November 16

U.S. May Host New World Soccer Tournament

Start the tournament now and build it up as a respectable voluntary alternative for those teams that are not interested in participating in the sordid 2022 Qatar convection.

Every planet deserves the chance to establish a Blatter-free zone.

posted by beaverboard at 02:01 PM on November 15

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Tahoe, with your Vegas water rights expertise, maybe we should shift strategy and get you the OJ Simpson account.

Just think, your name in lights, right up there with the celebrity attorneys.

"Good morning, Cochran, Bailey, Tahoe, and Dershowitz, how may I direct your call?"

(According to my understanding of his parole terms, OJ is not supposed to be anywhere near adult beverages. So much for that order.)

posted by beaverboard at 08:00 AM on November 14

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Thinking of establishing a Kickstarter fund that will allow the Bengals to put tahoemoj on a handsome retainer to provide Vontaze Burfict with legal services as the need arises. It appears to be a career opportunity with growth potential.

posted by beaverboard at 01:21 PM on November 13

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

During the 1990-91 season, there were two momentous, hard fought NFL collisions that captured the nation's attention. In December 1990, the 10-1 NY Giants went to Candlestick Park to play the 10-1 49ers. The Niners won the game 7-3. Seven weeks later in January 1991, the two teams met again for the NFC Championship. The Giants won 15-13 and went on to win the Super Bowl.

Then there's today's game.

posted by beaverboard at 01:52 PM on November 12

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

From sportswriter Victor Hugo's Auburn-Georgia post-game column:

"I dreamed a dream in time gone by, when hope was high and life worth living. I dreamed that love would never die. I dreamed that God would be forgiving ... But the tigers come at night, with their voices soft as thunder, as they tear your hope apart, as they turn your dream to shame."

- Zahn Malzahn

posted by beaverboard at 07:00 AM on November 12

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

who will the NFL get to replace Goodell?

1) They want someone who knows how to run a high risk / high profit operation and who demands total loyalty from those under his command. El Chapo Guzman.

or,

2) They want someone like Goodell who simply occupies space, has little or no personality, and doesn't say anything that seems to be of any substance or urgency. Norv Turner

or,

3) They want someone who has no idea what he's doing or talking about so the league can engage in a race to the bottom with the country at large. Mike Ditka

or,

4) They want a controversial Catholic who will stress that kneeling on Sunday is not such a bad thing once you work on it a bunch of times. Mel Gibson

posted by beaverboard at 01:34 PM on November 10

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Well, they need to do the name change, but I'll miss the double "E" logo, as will many people with electrical engineering degrees.

Maybe they'll go with animal imagery. If they wanted to save the logo they could do Eagles.

Or, I guess there's Bison, Cougar, and Lynx. If they went with Caribou, picture how wild those antler helmets would look. If they were done well, they would be the most inspired helmets in North America.

The page rumple linked to is chilling. Calling for local Edmonton temps of -12 C by middle of next week. Gawd. They'll be sawing ice out of the pond before Christmas. I don't think I'd survive at that latitude. My old truck sure as heck wouldn't.

posted by beaverboard at 08:25 AM on November 10

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

I don't mind a little trickery. I loved some of the stunts that the immortal Jeff Fisher's special teams pulled to torment the Seahawks, who were his favorite dupes. Pete Carroll almost gagged on his gum wad in disbelief (but he never stopped pacing purposefully along the sideline all bug eyed and clapping while he was busy shitting his drawers over what had just happened).

And that Devin Hester faux "play over" delayed runback of a field goal attempt that he caught in the end zone is just classic.

If the Steelers are ever trying to close out the final minute of a game, instead of going into a series of kneel downs, they should hand the ball off to Le'Veon and have him turn one of his patented hesitation runs into a full stop. The defense wouldn't know what to do for a couple of seconds. They'd be waiting for him to burst through the line and he'd be hanging back looking like he was about to accelerate but not going anywhere. It'd be like a bunch of old ladies in Buicks all arriving simultaneously at a four way intersection.

posted by beaverboard at 06:28 PM on November 08

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

I can't stop looking at this, and I can't stop laughing when I look at it.

Chiefs TD celebration.

posted by beaverboard at 09:08 AM on November 07

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Idle brain moment:

Proposing an AFC divisional realignment to shake things up a bit, which the NFL could stand to do, and also to become more geographically correct.

AFC East: Jets, Patriots, Ravens, Steelers

AFC North: Browns, Bengals, Bills, Colts

AFC South: Jaguars, Titans, Dolphins, Texans

- Taking the Dolphins out of the East reduces the weather advantages/disadvantages, such as the Pats playing in Miami in early Sept. or the Fins playing in Buffalo in late December.

- The Jets-Pats rivalry is preserved, and the Steelers-Ravens rivalry is added, giving the league a compelling double pole presence in the nation's major media region. Also, the Pats have well established nemesis relationships with the Steelers and Ravens.

- The Bengals-Browns rivalry is preserved in the North, and the Bills get to escape the shadow of the New England. And it allows Cincy and Indy to vie for their geographic region the way the Bears and Packers do.

- A Jags-Dolphins in-state rivalry would be created in the South, which would be more interesting than any divisional rivalry either of those teams currently has.

- The AFC West is left as is. KC could be a candidate to move out of the division, but the Chiefs-Raiders rivalry is too longstanding to break up, even if the Raiders move to Vegas.

posted by beaverboard at 08:42 AM on November 06

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

Some of our favorite college football teams are remarkably now bowl eligible, and so is Lane Kiffin.

It must be noted, his Owls have been putting up some serious point totals in recent weeks.

posted by beaverboard at 01:06 AM on November 05

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Happy Birthday Colin Kaepernick

Charge up your phone and make sure the fax machine is on...

Then blow out the candles.

Did the president really say that he could stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot pro quarterbacks and still no one would hire this guy?

posted by beaverboard at 09:34 AM on November 03

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Terrible news about Watson.

Well, Warden McNair, what'll it be? Tom Savage or Kaepernick?

posted by beaverboard at 08:36 PM on November 02

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

I've watched some compilations of Hekker's punts and fakes. The guy is sicker than a cruise ship passenger on sushi night.

What would have happened if Ainge had signed Hayward and drafted Fultz? Fohhhck.

posted by beaverboard at 02:22 PM on November 02

Astros Win World Series

Congrats Astros.

Wondering how many times a city or country's difficulties have been followed by sporting success. Obviously there is a varying degree of scale with the misfortunes involved.

Houston: Hurricane Harvey and World Series
Japan: earthquake and Women's WC championship
Manchester England: terror bombing and Man United Europa League title
New Orleans: Hurricane Katrina and Super Bowl win (5 year gap there)
Oakland - San Francisco: Loma Prieta Earthquake and World Series (tough to be the loser of that one)
St. Louis: 2011 Missouri tornadoes, World Series win

Those are a few that come to mind. There are no doubt many more. As well as devastating disappointments, such as the Yankees not winning the WS after the Sept. 11 attacks.

posted by beaverboard at 07:08 AM on November 02

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

A.J. McCarron is a very lucky man.

1) Miss Alabama

2) His trade to the Browns was voided by the league

I almost couldn't bear to read the details of the botched trade. How much worse can it get for the Cleveland front office? (And the Bengals office is no genius bar either).

How does Mary Kay Cabot keep getting up in the morning and going to work? If I had her job, I would have been put on a maintenance drip and approved for disability a long time ago.

posted by beaverboard at 10:58 PM on October 31

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

I think SF released Hoyer (I was once a believer in him - he had moments of promise...like that Flynn fellow did).

Knowing everything we know at this point, if it all could be done over, I would have traded Jimmy G. sooner for more assets and kept Brissett.

I think San Fran GM Lynch got something like a 5 or 6 year contract. Thus far, that seems like a worthwhile investment. He'll be my man of the hour if he helps set the league up so that no one insanely overpays for Kirk Cousins in 2018.

posted by beaverboard at 02:35 PM on October 31

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Why trade Garoppolo to a winless team for half of the state of Ohio before the draft when you can trade him to a winless team for a second rounder the night before Halloween?

posted by beaverboard at 12:23 PM on October 31

Jerry Jones Leads NFL Owner Revolt Against Roger Goodell

Jerry Jones is the love child of Ross Perot and Alexander Haig.

posted by beaverboard at 11:52 AM on October 31

Jerry Jones Leads NFL Owner Revolt Against Roger Goodell

It makes perfect sense to have talk of a revolt come up with ratings and revenues trending as they are, Ray Rice elevator event or not.

The first and most important detail is: which 17 owners are we talking about? Rooneys and Krafts? Or Glazers and Haslams? That makes a world of difference. No amount of agitating by the likes of the last two is liable to get anything done.

They shouldn't get too knicker bunched about how Roger handled the Chargers' move. If things keep going the way they're going, the Chargers' shift could prove prescient. Every NFL team might end up wanting a 30,000 seat stadium.

posted by beaverboard at 11:59 AM on October 30

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

I think there ought to be a day off between Games 4 and 5 if they're going to use the 2-3-2 format.

This is the second warmest fall on record from what I've seen. If this trend keeps up, who cares about going an extra day into November?

MLB's playoffs have become so edgy and compressed as they've been extended. The 1 game wild card play in, games on 3 consecutive days in a row during the LCS and WS - ridiculous. The only stage with any pacing and breathing room is the LDS, with a 2-2-1 format.

posted by beaverboard at 10:12 AM on October 30

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Designating today as North American Work From Home Day, sponsored by SpoFi and Major League Baseball.

Please do not wear team attire when video conferencing.

posted by beaverboard at 08:37 AM on October 30

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

The discussion about whether Yuli Gurriel should serve a suspension now or next season just got a few degrees warmer.

posted by beaverboard at 10:19 PM on October 29

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

"Every announcer should have total command of the complete legacy of Greek, Roman, and Western European civilizations and be able to summon impeccable cultural and historical references at will during the run of play"

- Ray Hudson

posted by beaverboard at 12:42 PM on October 29

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

Cavs no doubt look back on the Indiana game as a missed opportunity.

I wish they had a week off before Ga. Tech so they could spend extra time preparing for the GT offense.

posted by beaverboard at 07:26 PM on October 28

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

Lion's comment is proving true in real time -

At the half:

- Wake 28 Louisville 10

- Pitt 21 Virginia 7

For us Va. fans, the likelihood of going to some sort of bowl plus beating both UNC and Duke is a welcome change of fortunes that will offset the inevitability of losing to Va Tech.

posted by beaverboard at 02:02 PM on October 28

SportsFilter: The Saturday Huddle

What has gotten into the Boston College football program? Someone must have put nitroglycerine in the holy water.

The last 3 weeks they have been a juggernaut, first putting up tons of points against Louisville, then throttling Virginia and FSU to produce lopsided scores. And that's after three straight losses earlier in the season. Their upcoming game against NC State is actually going to be a big deal. Who knew?

posted by beaverboard at 09:19 AM on October 28

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

The concern with the outcome of the Wall-Ball hoops showdown is that his son not losing to Washington will just add more p.s.i. to LaVar's driver's side airbag.

Cool Lakers throwback unis.

That's about it for last night and Los Angeles.

posted by beaverboard at 02:06 PM on October 26

FoxSports "pivot to video" decision has cost them almost 90% of their audience.

I can't think of the last time I clicked on an article on a sports/news/entertainment website, and wanted to watch video it provided. I would much prefer to read an article than watch someone read that information to me through video.

Amen, amen, amen. I hate embedded video so much (especially when it launches without asking me) that I downloaded various browser add-ons just to block all that shit. I've got more blockers than Oklahoma.

Now, I find that there are other things I would like to do online that are not possible with the blockers enabled, but I'd still rather live without that functionality or have to temporarily disable the blockers than be a hostage to the video content.

posted by beaverboard at 12:33 PM on October 25

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Aye, Howard, them shore birds from the likes of Flowery Branch found themselves becalmed in a vast, still expanse. A sight ne'er before seen to 'em.

Younger men say there's no name fer it. I says there is.

Sarkisian's Sargasso.

Quinn won't find it on the maps he's got in his cabin. But it's there just the same.

posted by beaverboard at 03:20 PM on October 23

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Still plenty of time left in the third period and Bortles has already thrown for over 300 yards.

Between that and all the points FAU put up on N. Texas yesterday, rcade's head must be spinning like a top.

posted by beaverboard at 03:02 PM on October 22

NFL Pick 'Em Week 7: Brett Hundley Edition

Does this SpoFi carnage stop right here and right now?

posted by beaverboard at 02:18 PM on October 21

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

- Former Alabama OC Lane Kiffin left Saban for FAU and is currently 3-3, having lost to the likes of Buffalo

- Former OC Jimbo Fisher's FSU team is teetering

- Former OC Jim McElwain is on the hot seat at Florida

- Former OC Major Applewhite is having a tough time at Houston, giving up 42 points to Memphis in the second half last night after blanking them in the first half

- Former OC Steve Sarkisian went to the Atlanta Falcons, who have not been themselves this season

- Brian Daboll left the Patriots for Alabama, and the Pats have not been themselves this season

- Meanwhile, new Bama OC Daboll's Tide offense looks more relentless and unstoppable than ever

Anyone who becomes part of the Saban coaching carousel needs to realize that there will always be just one winner - the man at the center of it.

Saban's former assistants who have faced him have never beaten him. He has outscored them by a ratio of 4:1.

posted by beaverboard at 10:08 AM on October 20

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Not to mention it's the next to the last day of the WPT Deepstacks Iowa tournament at Riverside Casino.

posted by beaverboard at 12:44 PM on October 19

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

If the Crew does move south, they might as well get a fresh start and change their name to the Powers.

The pro soccer stadium and amenities "dialogue" is on a particle collider pace of evolutionary acceleration compared to the more established major league US sports. The bellwether Camden Yards facility is older than MLS itself.

posted by beaverboard at 12:32 AM on October 18

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Today is the last day of Curse Week in the NFL.

First up, we have the Curse of rcade, which is similar to the Madden Curse, but more immediate and unforgiving.

rcade made the "undefeated" Chiefs the headliners of the most recent NFL Pick 'Em edition and whoomp, there they went.

Then, the Ryan Fitzpatrick Curse inevitably struck again.

In that same game, Adrian Peterson ran like a man freed from a spell after being traded to Arizona by the cursed Saints.

posted by beaverboard at 09:04 AM on October 16

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Get a four door economy car on weekend rates with unlimited mileage from Enterprise.

Manageable. Justifiable.

But you have to stay in the state of Florida. Don't cross the river into Georgia or you void the terms. So if you wanted to head north on US 17 to smell the paper mills, sorry, hombre, no can do.

posted by beaverboard at 05:35 PM on October 15

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Team rcade's primary support vehicle is just arriving.

Secondary services setting up now, waiting for their permit.

posted by beaverboard at 04:56 PM on October 15

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

rcade, are you going down to Boca this week to see Lane Kiffin's FAU Hootermen try to slow down the North Texas Mean Green's bowl bound express train?

posted by beaverboard at 04:36 PM on October 15

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Listening to Celtics pre-season broadcasts, it sounds like a couple of bumpkin features reporters reviewing French specialty wines.

"Got some spring in the legs. Great finish. Semi Ojeleye brings a lot to the table".

If he keeps on doing what he did to the Sixers, they'll have to start calling him Fully Ojeleye.

Corollary event: in the late 1980's, Junior Felix came to Boston as a Blue Jays rookie and hit an inside the park grand slam. The local Sox announcer said, "If there's a Senior Felix, I sure as hell wouldn't want to pitch to him".

posted by beaverboard at 02:40 PM on October 13

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

I wasn't able to watch the NY-Cleveland game last night, so had to check the live box score online now and then.

After the game was over, it was too late to call 1-800-ASK-GRUM, but still, I had questions I was wondering about that were nagging at me.

Such as:

- Have the Indians ever lost an ALDS Game 5 at home after going up 2-0?
- Have the Yankees ever won an ALDS Game 5 on the road after going down 0-2?
- Have the Yankees ever gone down 0-2 and then won an ALDS Game 3 in a 1-0 pitcher's duel?

You know, those kinds of questions.

It's a relief to finally have stuff happen in 2017 (or 2016) that has actually happened before.

Bonus question: has there ever been a Lose 2 / Win 3 straight ALDS that featured a Game 5 seventh inning that stretched the limits of credulity?

posted by beaverboard at 08:35 AM on October 12

United States Eliminated from World Cup Qualification

If you're thinking of jumping off a bridge, you'll have to get in line behind all the USSF people that Taylor Twellman wants to push into the bay.

posted by beaverboard at 09:04 PM on October 11

United States Eliminated from World Cup Qualification

We've been spared a discussion about whether we should be obliged to stand for the Russian anthem.

posted by beaverboard at 12:44 PM on October 11

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

Maybe the Sox have their eye on someone that's so promising, they want to clear the deck and bring him on board before someone else snags him.

That was the thinking behind the hiring of Butch Hobson.

posted by beaverboard at 11:21 AM on October 11

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Beavers make Gary Andersen walk the plank.

Andersen waives buyout.

posted by beaverboard at 09:40 AM on October 10

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Given the current QB situation around the league due to injury or general suckage, right now Jacoby Brissett could probably start for the

Bears, Dolphins, Titans, Jaguars, Jets, Vikings, Bills, Browns, Niners, Raiders, Broncos, as well as the Colts.

For a hell of a lot cheaper than a swedish fish like Mike Glennon. Brissett represents some serious value at the league's premium position. He's worth a lot more than what New England got for him.

Hard to imagine he was in danger of not making the Pats roster. They carried 3 QB's last year and needed all 3 of them. The main guy is 40 and could go into a sudden decline anytime, kale smoothies and Brazilian massages or not.

posted by beaverboard at 08:38 AM on October 09

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Is rcade still down on the deck doing pushups after those Jaguars pick sixes?

The whupping took place at Heinz Field. 57 pushups per pick. 5 picks overall. Then off to La Cocina for dinner. Hooyah!

posted by beaverboard at 05:34 PM on October 08

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Clemson people are talking about it.

posted by beaverboard at 01:32 AM on October 07

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

I believe NC State is serious. I'll bet NoMich does too.

posted by beaverboard at 09:59 PM on October 06

'It's Funny to Hear a Female Talk About Routes.'

Having incurred Athena's displeasure, thus endeth the tale of the guardian of Acidophilus.

Will the fig bar account be next to go?

posted by beaverboard at 03:30 PM on October 05

NFL Pick 'Em Week 5: Cam Newton's Spoiled Yogurt Edition

They'll beat the Bucs if they can outscore 'em. That's the weekly 2017 story line. Jameis should be looking at film of the NE secondary and saying "I want some of that".

posted by beaverboard at 02:07 PM on October 05

'It's Funny to Hear a Female Talk About Routes.'

If I'm Rodrigue, next time I'm asking him nothing but Von Miller questions.

And also if he has dreams about Wade Phillips that are similar to the appearance of the marshmallow man in Ghostbusters.

posted by beaverboard at 08:03 AM on October 05

The most important news about the NHL this season: Jagr will play!

Maybe someday, there will be a "Breed Your Own Team" sporting event.

Cromarties versus Duggars.

Each team would have a 53 player roster limit.

posted by beaverboard at 10:13 PM on October 02