FIFA may need more time because they're considering an offer they just received proposing that they swap places with the U.S. House of Representatives.
posted by beaverboard at 12:27 PM on October 09
PriceWaterhouse said that based on the way the Jets and Texans seasons have gone to date, they can't assign an accurate dollar amount to the true value of Ryan Fitzpatrick's services.
posted by beaverboard at 08:47 AM on October 09
Belichick just heard of butt dialing, wanted to know how it works, called Kanye to find out. Figured someone in his household was bound to know.
Always thinking ahead to possible in-game deployment of the latest technological innovations.
posted by beaverboard at 11:17 AM on October 08
Uh, oh. I haven't seen Lebowski. Nor many other popular cultural milestones. Which I won't list, because I guess these severe shortcomings are disturbing to some.
Also have not been inside a major league pro sports facility since 1986 and have never tried to get anyone's autograph. Never wagered, collected baseball cards, or played any video games, and have no idea how fantasy sports works. Yikes. I'm screwed.
I guess I follow sports because the only other place that currently interests me where wild, heroic shit occurs that stretches the boundaries of credibility is Airplane Repo.
I've tried to spend more time improving myself by watching public television, but if I want to learn about deeply flawed human beings, Douglas MacArthur can't touch George Steinbrenner.
posted by beaverboard at 05:37 PM on October 07
When the Pope was here, he should have made MLB extend the Cubs-Pirates matchup to at least a 5 game set. This ain't right.
posted by beaverboard at 08:09 AM on October 07
I used to watch sports online because my cable service got so few channels. Finding live events was a bit of an adventure that was constantly changing.
I'd find a live stream from some sketchy source in eastern Europe or elsewhere with poor transmission quality or tiny screen size, or I'd get malicious website warning pop ups. And tons of online wagering ads.
Live stream online access has much less of a frontier feel to it now. I watched most of the 2014 World Cup on an old refurb laptop that didn't have a ton of other stuff running on it.
These days, I have more TV channels and I set the remote to "Guide" function and scroll through what's on, up to about channel 300. If I come across an event in progress that interests me, I check it out.
I don't have gear to record events with, and I don't plan my time around TV viewing, so it's whatever happens to be on when I have time to watch.
So a sidebar would be a huge plus that I would definitely use.
If there were listings for rebroadcasts, I would check those out as well. Sometimes MLS will replay the same match several times over the course of a few days.
posted by beaverboard at 09:24 PM on October 06
The Jags darn near handed the Colts a signature loss and are on track to being kings of the Sunshine State this year. Who knew?
posted by beaverboard at 12:45 PM on October 06
Plus, if the practice squad guys get in Tannehill's face, he's got backup.
The missus never misses.
posted by beaverboard at 12:40 PM on October 06
I can picture Stephen Ross reading about Matt Williams getting fired and saying to himself, "Hey we have a guy who looks just like that. Why not?"
posted by beaverboard at 12:28 PM on October 05
Is there a group that holds the Nordiques name and colors, brand imaging, etc.?
It would be great to see a new Quebec jersey that kept the fleur de lis but omitted the elephant zamboni logo on the front. Winnipeg did such a knockout job with the new Jets look, could Quebec do as well as that?
Don't want to derail the topic by changing sports but also have wondered why the CFL might not want to add a fifth East team in Quebec to balance the league's divisions.
Hope they can get both hockey and football.
posted by beaverboard at 10:29 AM on October 05
One if by land, two if by sea...
The Jets are bringing 350 rolls of toilet paper with them to England for their upcoming game against the Dolphins.
...to replace the thinner version used in England.
"Some may say that's a little over the top or whatnot, but it didn't really cost that much, so why not?" Degerness said. "We're basically trying to replicate everything that we're doing here over there."
"Some may say that's a little over the top or whatnot, but it didn't really cost that much, so why not?" Degerness said. "We're basically trying to replicate everything that we're doing here over there."
The men of Bowles are expected to venture forth and go boldly where other travelers have failed to go. For a 53 man roster, the paper supply works out to roughly 2 1/2 rolls per man per day for the amount of time they'll be on British soil.
The fabled London sewers, immortalized in legend and threatened by various calamities over the centuries, may now be facing their most daunting challenge.
posted by beaverboard at 08:58 AM on October 02
If one must be reincarnated as an inanimate object, rather than preside for many decades as a majestic building, far better to live a short but satisfying life as a humble Iberian stadium baguette, sweetly created, widely desired, occasionally nibbled, firmly grasped.
posted by beaverboard at 08:03 AM on October 02
If MLB just let the teams keep playing for another week and a half, the suddenly Godzilla Red Sox would help settle the situation.
Meanwhile the Giants are heading into the offseason perfectly positioned to continue their "every other year" title pursuit strategy.
posted by beaverboard at 12:49 AM on October 01
Currently tied in the 6th against Seattle, we have a major retail at-bat in progress, with Fields pitching to K Marte.
posted by beaverboard at 12:39 AM on October 01
I used to look at Marv Levy on the Bills sideline with winter approaching, and between the lack of hot air and the frailness of frame, the prospect of hypothermia was a real concern.
I'm relieved not to be burdened by those worries any longer.
posted by beaverboard at 01:59 PM on September 30
If someone wanted to piss off the Busch family, they could have the Cards' clubhouse celebration fueled by an alternate supplier.
posted by beaverboard at 11:06 AM on September 30
We've been taught to stare directly at Patriots surveillance services personnel and their camera equipment without expressing outward emotion, as though we have nothing to say and nothing to hide. None of us want to be brought down to the lower level for questioning.
In 2013, one guy in my section began doing what he thought were clever fake defensive signals as the cameras swung around. His seat has been empty since the Saints game. No word from the team on his whereabouts. We're still trying to confirm his location and condition.
posted by beaverboard at 08:52 AM on September 29
Where did Kevin Costner get that Tom Landry outfit?
posted by beaverboard at 07:32 AM on September 29
Some people wanted to see the team or Harper press charges against Papelbon. Good luck getting anywhere with that. The DC Police are still trying to organize their thoughts on the Chandra Levy case. They're at least one scoop of rice short of a plate lunch.
posted by beaverboard at 08:46 PM on September 28
If Donald Trump actually had a financial empire with a high net worth and learned to channel his combativeness into athletic prowess, he'd look like this.
posted by beaverboard at 01:32 AM on September 28
I think the Jets Eagles thing is part of the Kotite Edge Effect.
posted by beaverboard at 01:27 AM on September 28
The Maryland football team has no conscience or shame, going out and getting schooled once again in those idiotic joker-jester uniforms. Which are even worse now than when they were first introduced.
You can't show up in comic book togs if you're fielding church bulletin talent.
posted by beaverboard at 09:27 PM on September 26
Support for Al-Bama has taken on somewhat of a fundamental jihadist vibe.
"Do not seek victory against us, SEC infidels, or your bones will break and your trees will die".
"The coming haboob will rip the sundresses from your immodest women and clothe them in sand".
posted by beaverboard at 02:03 PM on September 25
Expedite the hearing today, for goodness sakes, so Brady can sit against the Jags this Sunday.
And then sit again against the Romo-less, Dez-less, and Hardy-less Cowboys, and the following week against the Luck-forsaken Colts.
After that, we'll take a read option for game 4 and break the consecutive schedule. Instead of targeting the Jets on Oct. 25, we'll check down to the Washington football team on Nov. 8.
Even if the Colts were currently competent, the league would absolutely not want Brady to compete against them, because he's been totally Tomageddon since being forced to start using properly inflated footballs at halftime of the AFC title game.
posted by beaverboard at 01:41 PM on September 25
All you need now is a board, son.
posted by beaverboard at 10:02 PM on September 24
Bonner is spot on. Brady hated his phone so much he had it destroyed. By an assistant.
posted by beaverboard at 12:42 PM on September 23
I've lived under 7 Popes but only one Yogi.
I have to find out when the services are. If I don't go to his funeral, he won't go to mine.
posted by beaverboard at 07:50 AM on September 23
From the decrypted dark side archives -
Belichick to Satan: Hey, we need another mad scientist in the league to take some of the negative attention away from me
Satan: I'll see what I can do. I still owe you one and will for all eternity
Belichick: I don't care how big his salary is. But he can't be as clever as I am
A few minutes later...
Satan: I think I can get Chip Kelly
posted by beaverboard at 10:14 AM on September 21
Although Goodell ducked out of attending the opening Steelers-Patriots game at Gillette Stadium, he was at the Packers-Bears game last week and will be at Lambeau for the Packers-Seahawks game tonight.
There must be something about elite QB's who prefer their footballs a bit overinflated.
posted by beaverboard at 06:37 PM on September 20
The Bills are...um...revved up for today's game against the Patriots.
I think the new coach has created a renewed sense of enthusiasm in the community in his own special way.
posted by beaverboard at 08:42 AM on September 20
Pre-season college football previewers had Louisville picked to make a major impact this year, maybe even winning the ACC.
Instead, they're now 0-3 and Petrino looks like he's ready to just get on a motorsickle and go flying down country lanes all by himself.
posted by beaverboard at 08:12 AM on September 18
I know that there are NY Giants fans who saw that last minute fumble return for the win and, thinking of the Joe Pisarcik and Herman Edwards "Miracle", said:
"WHY COULDN'T THAT HAVE HAPPENED WHILE ANDY REID WAS STILL IN PHILADELPHIA?"
posted by beaverboard at 08:00 AM on September 18
Both sources are hysterical. I had forgotten about the bad British vids. I will forget no longer. I've been waiting all my adult life for the name Mary Poppins and the word "knickers" to be used in the same run of commentary.
posted by beaverboard at 08:20 AM on September 16
I see this game as a good omen for rcade, who has arranged a dozen Texas Rangers playoff candles in a votive circle on the floor of his man cave.
posted by beaverboard at 10:11 PM on September 15
My Cassel is gone and my Bridgewater hath fallen short.
What shall I tell Milady?
O, I am left to Ponder the cruel prospect of a lesser station.
In my dreams, Cardale, thou art my trebuchet.
But for your allegiance, alas, there will be many rivals.
posted by beaverboard at 03:34 PM on September 15
65 million of Eli's new contract is guaranteed.
Deputy Fife is running around in his street clothes hollering "Hey! where's MY money?"
John Mara has become the anti-Kraft in more ways than one.
posted by beaverboard at 10:26 AM on September 15
Well, MCCown is out with a head knock and Manziel went in and promptly lit it up for a TD.
posted by beaverboard at 02:07 PM on September 13
As a former Virginian, I was so in awe of what he did in high school and so glad he chose not to attend Maryland.
Somewhere there must be footage of the HS tournaments he played in. It was man against boys and then some.
The Celtics are so lucky that the Bucks took them out in the 83 playoffs, so they didn't have to face the Sixers onslaught and the humiliation that would have been sure to follow. Being annihilated by the Sixers would have been a huge deal for Boston back then. Ryan and Shaughnessy would still be talking about it.
I can't believe that the Malone Sixers didn't win 3 or 4 titles.
I can still see him pushing his goggles up onto his forehead to take foul shots.
posted by beaverboard at 02:04 PM on September 13
Bill Belichick's girlfriend wants him to dress up as Dracula this Halloween, so he's going as Mark Dantonio.
(Great win Spartans, and awesome unis).
posted by beaverboard at 10:51 AM on September 13
If Belichick had really wanted to mess with the Steelers, he would have gone into the archives and had a recording of a latter stage Santos and Cappelletti radio broadcast pumped into the headsets. The Pittsburgh coaches wouldn't have known what time zone they were in.
posted by beaverboard at 12:32 PM on September 11
Any witnessing of or participating in Pats games that involves electronic equipment is done strictly at your own peril.
I was amused when the NYT referred to last night's headset problem as "skullduggery".
posted by beaverboard at 10:34 AM on September 11
According to the Legend of El Donaldo:
"All that glitters is goooaled"
posted by beaverboard at 04:23 PM on September 10
Now that there won't be a Super Bowl L, maybe NFL headquarters can code name all the main people like they do in the Bond films, and Goodell could be "L".
posted by beaverboard at 02:15 PM on September 10
And this is after the NYPD has invested a lot of money in various areas and Bratton is supposedly committed to changing the force and they even have a Tisch handling the technology effort.
They still have a long way to go.
posted by beaverboard at 09:58 AM on September 10
Being stuck with a journeyman starting QB comes at a cost.
Available ticketing for this Sunday's games as of this morning --
Titans at Bucs: 1600 unsold seats remaining
Browns at Jets: 7100 unsold seats remaining
In the first year of his top of the draft rookie package, Jameis Winston is only making around 85K per game more than Ryan Fitzpatrick. Jameis is virtually even money with Josh McCown's deal.
posted by beaverboard at 09:34 AM on September 10
I still think the Pats should kick off their 2015 Fuck The NFL campaign by starting Garoppolo tonight without saying a word about it before or afterward. No comment, no explanation, no ratings bonanza for the league. The goal is to win a 14-13 ballgame with the backup QB, Parcells style.
But if they were going to do that, they probably wouldn't have cut Jonas Gray (which I wish they hadn't done).
posted by beaverboard at 08:49 AM on September 10
The formations were not illegal until the league banned them after the fact in March.
Trick plays? Deceptive? Yes and Yes. If the league bans deception, a major tactical core would be taken out of the game. Stunting, men in motion, fake kicking plays, you name it.
This is just another case of a participant using their understanding of the boundaries of competition to the fullest in a creative way. The league could have chosen to continue to allow the practice, as America's Cup racing did after Ben Lexcen added a winged keel to Australia II.
But the NFL chose to ban the formations, not because opposing DC's wouldn't be able to make adjustments and figure out how to counter a new level of complexity on offense, but because the simpleton officials who already struggle to manage the games as it is would totally lose their minds if things got any more challenging.
posted by beaverboard at 10:10 AM on September 09
He's...in the Roger Murtaugh phase of his career.
I'm not looking for Brady to necessarily come out guns a blazing at the start of the season. He didn't look that great in the preseason, and the online yakkers are full of chit chat about the toll that the flation case has taken on him, he's bitter and short tempered, the marriage is in trouble, yada, yada.
And now he's having to answer questions about the Trump hat, among other things. Got himself well occupied with lots of stuff other than football and may not really be ready to go. Just what the coach wants.
posted by beaverboard at 03:28 PM on September 08
As Parliament Funkadelic's George Clinton once said:
"This shit ain't over."
posted by beaverboard at 03:36 PM on September 07
In the wake of Judge Berman's ruling, Goodell has decided not to attend the marquee Steelers-Patriots season opener on Thursday night.
He was going to attend if Berman had ruled in favor of the league?
He was presumably going to sit in the owner's box as a guest of the Krafts. Cozy.
This will be seen as a missed opportunity in some quarters. Ronda Rousey was planning to ride down in the service elevator with the commissioner after the game.
posted by beaverboard at 08:38 PM on September 05
With ironmen like Bradford and Sanchez on the team, I give it to week four before he's back in Philadelphia.
If the Eagles were still playing at Veterans Stadium, Bradford would get hurt during the coin toss.
posted by beaverboard at 02:01 PM on September 05
I do agree with forrestv that he may be a useful stooge from the owners' perspective depending on how involved he has been in the revenue increases.
It's Pash that needs to be called to the stand when the appeal hearing gets underway. It seems more and more as though Pash has been playing a shadow Cheney to Goodell's nominal head of state George W.B.
Hard to imagine we're not even halfway through the term of the current CBA. Wonder if there will be a movement afoot to amend it before 2020.
If the owners do not see fit to terminate Goodell, it would be in their interest to modify the current CBA to prevent him from doing more damage while he remains in office. At the very least, add a provision that mandates independent arbitration.
posted by beaverboard at 12:21 PM on September 04
Goodell has an almost magical ability to handle a situation so that it spirals from something definable and manageable into something unpredictable and uncontrollable. And exponentially complex and damaging as it unfolds.
Now Greg Hardy is considering whether or not to go to court to contest his four game suspension - which had already been reduced from 10 games! These are the sorts of things that happen in Goodell's world. Ill factors beget other ill factors. You can't do the arithmetic up front on how fucked up things are liable to get.
Note to Greg:
You don't like the call on your home kung fu
Not every court is kangaroo
You're a lucky man
Better let it stand.
There has also been a dimension to Goodell's activities that has a deep and compelling sense of urgency to it. The shit he does matters to people that matter. It goes well beyond the stuff that other frightfully impaired commissioners like Selig and Bettman have done. Bill Simmons felt strongly enough to gamble his job on Goodell's character and lost. He's a seasoned, accomplished professional and he got emotional.
Once Goodell gets drummed out of league HQ, who knows where he'll end up. Sure as hell not in clandestine services. Every day is like the Bay of Pigs with this guy.
"Commissioner, the Trump campaign is on line one..."
posted by beaverboard at 06:06 PM on September 03
This is not a day of vindication. There are more squares left on the game board. The unctuous dunce is still in office.
We're at the point with Goodell where if someone were to tell me that Matt Millen was available and willing to oversee the league, my immediate response would be: "When can he start?"
posted by beaverboard at 11:49 AM on September 03
Thanks so much for posting this. Haven't gotten all the way through it yet due to a temporary shortfall in emotional fortitude. But I will.
One of the things this piece made me wonder about for the first time is how the hell the Packers were able to gather themselves after the punishment they took in the Ice Bowl, to the point where they were able to go out and dominate a damn good Raider team in the Super Bowl.
posted by beaverboard at 11:08 AM on September 02
Of course all my irony-and-doomsday-prone friends whose families came from the old country (via County Cork) are saying over pints that Brady will get to play but will get dinged up by Rex's defense and they'll have to send Garoppolo out there anyway.
posted by beaverboard at 10:21 AM on September 01
The goal is continued relentless exposure of the incompetence of the commissioner and of the absurdity of his disciplinary strategy and decisions. The torment that the league is currently enduring is entirely of Goodell's making. Both through his bumbling actions and his derelict inactions. It's just a question of how long it will take for the owners to do what they need to do.
Despite all the prestige and persuasiveness that Kraft has accrued as an owner, he doesn't need to stand up and ask for Goodell's head at this point. He can (and should) let his colleagues do the deed themselves of their own free will without his influence. Kraft has previously shown a willingness to try to be reasonable and find a way forward, and has been compliant by accepting the fine and loss of draft choices that Goodell foisted on his franchise without ample foundation or merit.
I certainly wish that Kraft had fought back on that instead, as a firm defense on all fronts would have hastened the exposure and demise of this plague of a commissioner.
posted by beaverboard at 10:12 AM on September 01
If Berman rules for the NFL, Brady will probably file for a stay, and this thing will continue on while Brady suits up and plays.
By now, there are probably some owners who are ready to place Goodell alongside Jimmy Hoffa for having orchestrated this fiasco on behalf of the NFL. Which is an understandable sentiment. The problem being that Hoffa deserves better company.
It's almost unimaginable to recall that at one time, the Pats were the league's golden boys to whom the commissioner was happily indebted for having tuck ruled the despised Al Davis' Raiders and kept them out of the Super Bowl. By the time the deflation tale is fully told, the bad blood between Davis and the league will be seen as practice squad level compared to the splendor of the enmity that now exists between Kraft and Goodell.
At this point, my main interest in seeing the Pats win another title is so I can watch the team stare Goodell's sorry ass off the stage in total silence at the trophy presentation.
posted by beaverboard at 09:02 AM on September 01
Noting that the Bills released Fred Jackson, the first thought that entered my mind was him going to Foxboro as Antowain Smith 2.0
posted by beaverboard at 05:13 PM on August 31
posted by beaverboard at 02:43 PM on August 31
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