- 01:27 AM
- 11/22/09
Who cares what people do at their own receptions?
They probably couldn't wait to get it on Youtube.
If they didn't want anyone to care what they did at their reception they wouldn't put it on youtube vimeo.
/obvious
posted by Ufez Jones at 07:30 PM on November 19
Sounds like he'd be a perfect fit for The Three Lions, Howard.
*runs off*
posted by Ufez Jones at 06:16 PM on November 17
Damn. And here I thought my HMO was bad.
posted by Ufez Jones at 04:09 PM on November 17
I think Quinn has forgotten the David Carr Rule of Quarterbacking; the amount of time you spend on your lovely hair is directly inverse to quality of on the field performance.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:22 PM on November 17
I wonder if he will get in game shape soon enough to help the Grizzlies.
Help them do what, exactly? No disrespect to the franchise, but it's not like they're going to be competing for a playoff spot this year. They have a nice small group of younger players, mostly with Gay, Mayo, and Gasol, but this whole stupid idea of signing the likes of Zach Randolph and Iverson and now Tinsley just makes no sense. It's throwing money away for the sake of throwing money away.
posted by Ufez Jones at 08:18 PM on November 14
Maybe the promise of signing Avery Johnson this off-season would appease Paul? It would make a lot sense, not the least because Avery is a proud son of New Orleans.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:05 PM on November 13
I'm no graphic designer, but I've always thought the re-branding of the logo and team colors that the Bucs did was one of the most successful and well-done in all of pro sports. The retouched Bucs helmet looks like something more fitting an arena-league team (or the XFL).
The Wash one isn't bad, though. Pretty interesting take on it.
posted by Ufez Jones at 03:14 PM on November 10
Singlehandedly? You act like Matt Geiger wasn't even there! For shame, rcade. For shame.
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:47 PM on November 10
So God was wrong?
The Memphis deal never made sense on a few different levels. I'd be shocked to see AI have to resort to playing abroad, especially if he's willing to sign a 1-year deal at a less than MLE price.
I'd love to see him back in DC playing for the Wiz. A backcourt of Agent Zero and Iverson would be must watch, both on the court and off.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:11 AM on November 10
people just think I'm biased.
Amen tahoe ...The big problem is 99.9% of them
Yeah, I hate when people stereotype me while I'm busy stereotyping them too.
posted by Ufez Jones at 07:54 PM on November 05
Fun fact: Fans of the team have more unique ways to say "Fuck the Rangers" than Inuits do for "snow".
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:06 PM on November 05
I doubt Dez and Michael Trabtree are the only ones, so apparently a few young athletes, cixelsyd.
posted by Ufez Jones at 05:56 PM on October 29
I think the athletes that have gotten away with much worse (did that Reggie Bush house situation ever get resolved?) have a much larger impact on the shady dealings of College Sports than an overzealous punishment for a quasi-mistake about nothing, really.
The only real effects I can see this having are ending Bryant's college career (not to mention hurting OSU's chance at beating Texas this Saturday) and hurting Deion's reputation.
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:56 PM on October 29
It's probably going to be the end of Dez's college career. Okie State QB Zac Robinson is a senior and has (to the best of my knowledge) no heir apparent. I can't see Bryant wanting to return to Stillwater to help break in a new QB.
Hopefully Dez will get the last laugh on the foolhardy folks at the NCAA and go on to have the great professional career he seems capable of.
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:26 PM on October 29
It can't possibly be any worse than Bob Dylan's new Christmas album.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:10 PM on October 29
I appreciate the concern, rogers, but I'll humbly suggest that it's those poor nubile graduates that are the deprived victims here, not me.
posted by Ufez Jones at 05:44 PM on October 21
cjets - the part I find objectionable is the implication that the situation and people involved are more deplorable because she's unattractive, or that Phillips wouldn't be as much of a shitheel if he'd been sleeping with a hot 22-year-old coworker. Her physical attributes have *nothing* to do with the story, other than cheap laughs.
Atheist & dusted - I don't want to derail this further, so I'll just play the "it aint evil, just a personal preference" card and leave it at that.
posted by Ufez Jones at 05:29 PM on October 21
Man. I'm 30, single, and not a public figure and I'd feel lecherous sleeping with a 22 year old. Phillips obviously needs to grow the hell up.
I wonder how many keyboard comedians would feel comfortable posting pictures of everyone they've slept with for the internet to judge?
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:59 PM on October 21
Perhaps the dispenser contained more nude pics that Reed took with his phone to send to random girls at a bar?
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:41 AM on October 19
I'd heard Padilla was a divisive character in the clubhouse, but if he can get all the way to the top of an organization in this short of time, his powers must be far greater than feared.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:26 PM on October 15
There will likely be a half dozen NFL coaching gigs open by the end of the season. If Gruden would like to end his overly positive stint discussing rainbows and kittens four hours a week and return to the sidelines, I should think he'd be able to land one.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:12 AM on October 15
Paris Hilton
My bad. Same product, different packaging.
posted by Ufez Jones at 04:05 PM on October 13
Didn't Simpson do a fairly suggestive Carl's Jr commercial a few years back? Or am I getting my starlets mixed up?
Regardless, the Cowboys are supplying plenty of fodder on their own this season for humor. Resorting to poking fun at the QB's ex seems pretty damned lazy.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:19 PM on October 13
Seems this is just another piece in the plan of Cleveland to scare LeBron from moving to New York. "Let's see: we've shipped off that clown that made LeBron cry at his fifth birthday party, the middle school gym coach that wouldn't let him leave early to change after he sharted during dodgeball, every girl that turned him down for the junior prom, and now that guy with bricks for hands that cold-cocked his buddy. How are those plans coming to set the Hudson ablaze?"
posted by Ufez Jones at 03:31 PM on October 07
It's probably fair to add Buffalo to Minnesota on the list of Dallas victims, at least in the 90s. Back-to-back Super Bowl defeats and then Hull's Stanley Cup winning goal in triple-OT in 99.
Very interesting column, Qatarian. Thanks!
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:42 PM on October 06
So Rams home games will then be played in the Oxycodome?
posted by Ufez Jones at 04:50 PM on October 06
That's nice of the Angels to remember Adenhart (and not very surprising given that they have kept his jersey in the dugout all season), but isn't it a bit odd to pour champagne on his jersey given that he was killed by a driver with a BAC of .19?
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:31 PM on October 01
Sorry, BI. Your first comment read less as "Nike has a history of farming out their manufacturing to areas with deplorable labor conditions" and more like "nike's products are made in a part of the world whose culture I disagree with". Then I got caught in y your edit window the second time around.
Anyhow, whatever the reason, if more people are thinking harder about voting with their dollars and deciding to buy from a (hopefully) slightly less evil corporation, that's fine by me.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:36 AM on October 01
Again, neither stated that their viewpoints had anyrthing to do with Vick's endorsement. Nike is one of the corporations (with McDonald's, Raytheon, GM and many more) that have been viewed as the leaders in corporate greed and deplorable labor practices. Right or wrong - and it's a very complex issue that probably doesn't belong here - people have been boycotting Nike for well over a decade.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:10 AM on October 01
I won't speak for rcade or thebigmick, Icon, but neither of them stated that Vick's endorsement deal was the last straw when it comes to shopping decisions.
Also, oddly enough, there are a lot of people, myself included, that enjoy an order of steak fajitas or a nice omelette that still find bullfighting or cockfighting to be grotesque and senselessly cruel. Your comparison doesn't hold much water.
posted by Ufez Jones at 09:51 AM on October 01
I know Nike's decision to sponsor the Heaven's Gate Away Team was fairly controversial, but at least they only killed themselves. This is a bit much, Mr. Knight.
posted by Ufez Jones at 10:56 PM on September 30
I'd vote against Rio just so we wouldn't have to endure playing that damned Duran Duran song four times an hour for two and a half weeks.
But I'm with bill. A singular, permanent site would avoid all of this mess and get some extended use out of the costly facilities.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:22 PM on September 30
To paraphrase Bob Sturm, rcade, "I guess when you can't make the Super Bowl, you throw your own. In September."
posted by Ufez Jones at 08:54 PM on September 26
Did Kobe win because Duncan is the most boring superstar on the world has ever seen?
I think it has more to do with the fact that big men seem far less multi-dimensional than SG/SFs. Duncan has been a hell of a player, but he does 90% of his work within the key or a few feet away from it. Your typical 2-3 is involved in bringing the ball up the floor, perimeter defense, driving the lane, guarding PGs, SGs, SFs, and occasionally smaller PFs, and are expected not just to score, but also have decent assist and rebound numbers.
Except in my alternate reality where Nash stayed in Dallas and won a fourpeat with Dirk.
I just cried a little bit, on the inside.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:34 PM on September 25
I'd rather see Brooklyn Lokomotiv, Juan.
posted by Ufez Jones at 07:14 PM on September 23
In an apparent bid to out-crazy new teammate Ron Artest, Lamar Odom is marrying one of the Kardashian kids after dating for about two weeks.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:06 PM on September 23
Someone's been playing too much Grand Theft Auto.
posted by Ufez Jones at 07:17 PM on September 19
Dallas Cowboys TE Martellus Bennett has his own YouTube channel. There's a lot of hidden comedy gold in there. The Cap N Crunch song is borderline genius.
posted by Ufez Jones at 04:11 PM on September 18
Okay, sure, it's a feel-good piece that settles somewhere on the spectrum between journalistically lazy and borderline offensive.
Like I said, I enjoyed learning a bit about Foxworth. I just wish Schwarz (or his editors) had used more of the space alloted for some context and depth instead of terrible analogies and further whipping of the now decomposed horse that are the Shocking Headlines of the Bad Boys of Professional Sports™.
Frankly, if I were Foxworth, I'd be pretty pissed off.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:52 PM on September 15
It's a very interesting subject, but Schwarz ought to be ashamed to draw a paycheck for the twelve minutes he apparently spent writing this piece of shit article.
"His own private bomb shelter". Really? Are you painting Foxworth as having one foot in the past and one in the present, or is he a paranoid militiaman?
"When this player shoots from the hip, it ain't with a glock in a nightclub" -- Right. As opposed to the vast majority of other professional athletes roving the countryside pillaging and marauding and terrorizing the populace. Maybe it's a good thing Foxworth has that "bomb shelter" after all.
"It was a drawing of a parachute". What the fuck, Alan? That alone would merit the loss of a letter grade in a middle school English class.
I'm not slagging your post, tommy. Foxworth sounds like a very interesting guy, and I'd had no idea of his interests. I'm glad to learn a bit about him. But man, I'd have thought the NY Times could do better than this.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:10 PM on September 15
Cutler had a pretty bad night, tbut that Costas/Leno interview was a far worse performance.
posted by Ufez Jones at 03:35 PM on September 14
I see. It couldn't possibly have been management or the players' faults. Let's blame the wimminfolk!
posted by Ufez Jones at 04:02 PM on September 10
I heard about this a few days ago, but I hadn't seen the terms of the deal 'til now. I can't believe that Iverson is willing to come off the bench for $3.5 MM and the best opportunity was a team that will almost certainly finish under .500.
Makes no damn sense to me.
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:40 PM on September 10
I'm pretty sure Jermaine has a "No reaching-out" clause in his contract, lest he aggravate an injury and miss another 30-40 games.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:52 PM on September 09
Not everyone can have the sartorial splendor of Jesper Parnevik.
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:52 AM on August 30
Going on a Maddoxian multi-state 48 hour binge fueled by opiates and the blood of prostitutes?
posted by Ufez Jones at 09:21 AM on August 30
Related: The NYTimes has an interesting article today on the Dolphins' attempt to re-brand the franchise "into the N.F.L.'s version of the Los Angeles Lakers":
The Dolphins unveiled their latest rebuilding effort a few weeks ago not on the practice field, but rather on a fashion runway at an opulent private club best known as the site of a famous celebrity murder. A pop art star and a rapper were the primary attractions as the sun set over South Beach that night.I'm sure Parcells is *loving* all of this....A few weeks earlier, the Dolphins held a news conference in a mall that featured a blasting soundtrack and an appearance by Jennifer Lopez. That followed a casting call for singers to be hired by the team, a new team song and a stadium renamed for a niche beer with a connection to a local icon.
posted by Ufez Jones at 09:26 PM on August 20
I wonder if Venus can run routes? She's one hell of an athlete and Pennington needs *someone* to throw to.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:51 PM on August 20
I don't think Pudge's addition tips the wild-card into the Rangers favor any, but I don't see much downside. If Salty isn't able to come back, you have an experienced C to spell Teagarden. If Jarrod does return, you've got Pudge to mentor and advise two very young catchers as the playoff race nears or (hopefully) playoff games begin. Welcome back, Pudge.
posted by Ufez Jones at 08:03 PM on August 18
I'm seriously beginning to think that there's a guerilla marketing firm out there selling organizations on the idea of "internet outrage" as a viable means of raising brand awareness.
I mean, these massive muti-millionaires can't possibly be this stupid, can they?
posted by Ufez Jones at 11:28 AM on August 18
You mess with the bull, you get the horns.
posted by Ufez Jones at 03:08 PM on August 17
Heh. Bad timing for this story to appear, owlhouse. Are you going to take her? You should go with. I went about ten years ago, and while I wouldn't say it was life-changing, it was a lot of fun. I went tandem, though (with a very experienced jumper that was probably a good 6 inches or so shorter than me), so it was a bit safer. If I do it again I'd like to go solo, but who knows if I'll ever get around to it.
posted by Ufez Jones at 09:02 AM on August 17
I can't help but wonder if this is just going to lead to further milking of the taxpayers' wallets to construct/renovate a course worthy of an Olympic tourney. Not everyone has a Pebble Beach or Augusta or Southern Hills or whatever nearby.
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:15 PM on August 13
Weird. I don't recall seeing any photos of Becks and Posh sitting in the stands.
posted by Ufez Jones at 01:41 PM on August 13
Good for Jozy. He's obviously got talent, and playing in the EPL is a far better option for growth than the MLS. Hull seems like a pretty good option as playing time shouldn't be too difficult to come by.
Besides, I need a team give my half-assed support to while Newcastle get their shit together, which could be quite a few years.
posted by Ufez Jones at 06:20 PM on August 06
That's a state secret, fatty, like the mysterious lights of Marfa or why anyone would choose to live in Houston.
it's really just an awkward combination of TV Station + first name
posted by Ufez Jones at 05:50 PM on August 05
That's actually a bit of a more plausible use of twitter for fantasy sports, dviking. Not so much following the players themselves, but the local reporters for teams. During the NBA playoffs this year, I got quality, up to the minute news on lineup changes and whatnot during Mavs pre-game warm-ups from Gina Miller (@txagina).
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:45 PM on August 05
I'm half tempted to draft a fantasy team of players with active Twitter accounts. I can imagine waiting for Monday Night Football to start and sending out desperate messages that look something like "@lightsout Team down double digits. Need 3 sacks and 8 tackles from u. Thx!"
And then, if it happened, it'd be like a 21st Century bastardized version of Babe Ruth hitting a homer for a sick kid in a hospital bed.
posted by Ufez Jones at 12:21 PM on August 05
This only serves to bolster the whining from the anti-Tiger crowd who constantly complain that Woods "could fart and it would be front-page news!".
posted by Ufez Jones at 02:01 PM on August 04
SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle
The goddamned Klan are planning a rally at this weekend's LSU/Ole Miss game in protest of Chancellor Dan Jones' decision to remove "From Dixie with Love" from the Ole Miss band's song selection.