Recent Comments by Mr Bismarck

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

James Rodriguez jumped from Monaco to Madrid today, for about 80 million Euros.

Monaco double their money in a year. Then keep all of it because LOLTaxes.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:51 PM on July 22

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Meanwhile, it was a busy German Grand Prix today.

Some Germans showed up with their living room.


Massa went upside down.


Kvyat caught fire.


And three different World Champions drove into Kimi, including this sandwich between Vettel and his own teammate, Alonso...


posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:08 PM on July 20

SportsFilter: The Sunday Huddle

Worth watching to hear the pronunciation of that name.

Finally.

Although I still want to hear Twellman and Darke have a run at it.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:01 PM on July 20

LeBron James Returning to Cleveland

According to Steven A. Smith this move makes LeBron the "most beloved sportsman in the world."

So it's nice to see we're maintaining perspective.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:16 PM on July 11

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

"A pretty Belgian fan's photo at the World Cup went viral, landing her a modeling gig."

Axelle Despiegelaere

What a spectacular name.

I'll have to ask Tayler Twellman how to pronounce it.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:14 AM on July 10

Brazil Faces Germany for Spot in World Cup Final

Argentina need to lose tomorrow to make sure we have two important games left, not one.


posted by Mr Bismarck at 06:25 PM on July 08

Brazil Faces Germany for Spot in World Cup Final

Germany is up by a touchdown in the 85th minute.

Brazil got a rouge at the end.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 06:02 PM on July 08

Brazil Faces Germany for Spot in World Cup Final

I thought ESPN were showing this game, but they seem to be rerunning The Red Wedding.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 05:04 PM on July 08

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Slightly late for Wimbledon, but: Capybaras That Look Like Rafael Nadal.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:18 AM on July 07

Germany Closes Down France in World Cup

One person in Paris was happy with the result.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:18 PM on July 05

Brazil Knocks Out Colombia, But Loses Neymar

Keep the quality coming, Yahoo.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:28 AM on July 05

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Howard, in one image.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:15 PM on July 03

Michael Bradley Covered Most Ground in World Cup

But most of me wants to stand up, applaud and yell at all the other teams that this is how they should all play

I think the reason it was so entertaining was because the US couldn't keep the ball and Howard was outstanding. I wish the US could bottle their effort and team spirit and sell it to England, but I don't see too many teams aspiring to have a technically limited midfield playing in front of a miraculous goalkeeper.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:50 AM on July 03

U.S. Falls to Belgium Despite Epic Tim Howard Performance

Ian Darke:

91:45 : A slow start here, by Belgium.

92:01 : Belgium scores.


"Lukaku who had looked terrible in the group stage."

Interesting, that. Since the injury to Benteke the answer to "who is Belgium's best forward?" seems to be "whoever's on the bench."

To be fair to him, Origi looked decent today. But he also looked quite raw, which is appropriate, as that's exactly what he is.

I hope by Saturday someone has asked Kevin de Bruyne how to say his name, so we don't have to go through the 19 different pronunciations we had today.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:00 PM on July 01

U.S. Falls to Belgium Despite Epic Tim Howard Performance

Third team we've seen today with one really good player and then... some others. Without Howard that's an absolute massacre.

Like Ochoa, I expect it'll be a man of the match award and a flight home.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 06:35 PM on July 01

U.S. Falls to Belgium Despite Epic Tim Howard Performance

If the US can get past Belgium they get a Saturday afternoon game on July 4th weekend.

I really like Belgium, (especially if Divock Origi can finally put a spearpoint on their pretty approach play), but I'd love to see the sort of madness we'd have here with a game on Saturday.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:40 PM on July 01

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

So apparently this is happening.

At first glance I thought Kaka had signed for the Ravens. Which would have been eponsysterical.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:22 PM on July 01

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Scotland used to have a free kick routine based around a fake argument between two players who apparently were both going to take the kick. One would then shove the other to the ground and in the confusion, a third would run up and smash the ball, (usually Into the stands).

So when I saw the kick the first time I thought it was deliberate. Giving Muller too much credit.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:11 AM on July 01

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

"EDIT: here's a better link."

That's the link I posted.

I presume this is going to derail Urguguay's appeal, unless they're going to re-route it to being purely about lowering the length of the ban, (which would also please Barca, of course).

Edit : Annnnnnd... Here's Barca chief Andoni Zubizarreta praising Suarez for being "humble." after his "apology."

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:35 AM on July 01

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Luis Suarez apologises for biting Chiellini.

A proper approval too. Not an "I'm sorry if anyone was offended" apology.

" I deeply regret what occurred. I apologise to Giorgio Chiellini and the entire football family."

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:25 PM on June 30

Mexico Faces The Netherlands in Round of 16

but at the end of the first half Robben was kicked in the box by two separate Mexicans and got nothing for it

For clarity, this is the one I'm talking about. He gets his heel clipped and then his left foot cleaned out by two Mexican defenders who make no contact with the ball at all.

As for the penalty that was given - I thought it was a Robben special : a foul and a dive. He turns the embellishment dial to 9 after contact, but then in the first half he got clear contact, fell down normally and got nothing.

What lesson would you take out of that?

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:36 AM on June 30

Mexico Faces The Netherlands in Round of 16

Robben won't be taking a holiday in Mexico anytime soon.

Everyone will focus on the end of the game, but at the end of the first half Robben was kicked in the box by two separate Mexicans and got nothing for it.

I'll be interested to see if FIFA has something to say about coaching during the water breaks. van Gaal got to make a number of changes all at once and convey them to his team together because of the break and then Mexico then had to respond on the fly, the old fashioned way.

As a neutral it made for a better spectacle than the 3-5-2 mirror match that was happening earlier in the game though.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 08:16 AM on June 30

Brazil Faces Chile in World Cup's First Knockout Game

I am ready for something other than penalties to decide knockout matches.

I love penalties. If every knockout game was tense and hard fought and then ended in a shoot out I'd be delighted.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:23 PM on June 28

Colombia Faces Suarez-Less Uruguay in World Cup Knockout

The latest from Suarez :

"I lost my balance, making my body unstable and falling on top of my opponent."

Keep 'em coming, Luis.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:35 PM on June 28

Luis Suarez Banned 9 Games for Biting Opponent

I got bitten by a snake today. An Eastern Racer.

This is why my neighbours got to see me shout "Fuck you, Suarez!" while hurling an angry snake off my back deck this afternoon.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:19 PM on June 27

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Yes - the way the stage fell means only one of Brazil, Chile, Colomiba and Uruguay can make it to the semi-finals.

Meanwhile, Ann Coulter doesn't like soccer.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:27 PM on June 26

Luis Suarez Banned 9 Games for Biting Opponent

If a player is called up to represent his national team and his club refuses to let them appear, then FIFA can ban him from playing in the subsequent two club games. Teams can claim a player is injured, but if the national team smells conspiracy or is just being a pain they can call him up anyway.

Players can "retire" from international consideration (and then later un-retire). Provided it's the player making the decision not to go, FIFA won't force them.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:52 PM on June 26

U.S. Escapes Group of Death, Advances Despite Loss

Jermaine Jones ran into the referee, kicked the ball into his own face and ran head first into his own teammate.

Quite the hattrick.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:02 PM on June 26

Luis Suarez Banned 9 Games for Biting Opponent

We're watching both at once!

Work has a two hour pizza and ice cream party for the US game. We have a ton of people in here with the US game on the big screen and the Ghana game on a projector off to the side.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:08 PM on June 26

Luis Suarez Banned 9 Games for Biting Opponent

Can we make the Waltons joke for the Ghanaian own goal?

Goodnight John Boye?

Anyone?

I'll get my coat.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:49 PM on June 26

Luis Suarez Banned 9 Games for Biting Opponent

Was it FIFA BS when the Dutch FA banned Suarez for 7 games for biting?

Was it FIFA BS when The FA banned Suarez for 10 games for biting?

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:47 PM on June 26

Luis Suarez Bites Opponent at World Cup

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:22 PM on June 25

Luis Suarez Bites Opponent at World Cup

FIFA's new technology has confirmed it.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:54 PM on June 24

Luis Suarez Bites Opponent at World Cup

"These situations happen on the field," [Suarez] said. "I had contact with his shoulder, chest against shoulder and I got a knock to the eye nothing more."

posted by Mr Bismarck at 06:59 PM on June 24

Luis Suarez Bites Opponent at World Cup

I hope Luis enjoyed his World Cup.

He claimed to have been inspired by a lack of respect against England, so he should be getting plenty of inspiration in the next few weeks.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 04:15 PM on June 24

LeBron Taking His Talents Out of South Beach

He could, of course, decide to take his talents right back to south beach with a brand new deal, right?

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:12 AM on June 24

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

posted by Mr Bismarck at 10:11 AM on June 24

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Mike and Mike just announced that LeBron is exercising his option for early termination of his contract with the Heat.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:33 AM on June 24

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Mexico's victory today confirmed their progress to the knockout phases of the World Cup, after their chances of even qualifying for the tournament were saved by Graham "Saint" Zusi.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 05:48 PM on June 23

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

In the last five minutes I was hoping for some sort of madness to end in a 3-1 victory for Costa Rica, so after a final game draw we'd have the group decided with a FIFA coin flip (bribery optional, but recommended).

Bravo to the Ticos - they alternated between a really high pressing line and clogging the passing lanes and Italy had no idea what to do with it.

Bravo to the Italians for being called offside 11 times. New Milan manager Pippo Inzaghi will be delighted.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:23 PM on June 20

SportsFilter: The Friday Huddle

Costa Rica should really be 2-0 up at half time here. Ruiz's header was great, but a minute before Campbell was bundled over from behind in the area by Cheillini and the Ref somehow didn't see anything.

Costa Rica's high line is bonkers - they're so high they're pressurising Buffon on goal kicks. It only takes one mistake from the defence or the linesman to let Balotelli in, but if they can keep this up all game then they're really making Italy uncomfortable.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:53 PM on June 20

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Is the ticker long enough for all the soft, he said/she said, may/may not language?

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:14 PM on June 19

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

I guess not having a playbook makes sense. It must be hard to draw up the butt fumble.

Deciding which crayon to use, for a start.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:31 PM on June 19

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

Tom Brady may or may not have mentioned to someone at Wes Welker's wedding that Bill Belichick may or may not have had a copy of the New York Jets' playbook.

This is shocking news. I had no idea the Jets had a playbook.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:57 PM on June 19

SportsFilter: The Thursday Huddle

You have to give a player at least ten yards of space at dead ball situations, (like penalties) - that half circle is 10 yards from the penalty spot.

I guess I shouldn't take almost an hour to type a reply.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:45 PM on June 19

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

I think the reason Behrami got back up was because it was so clearly a foul. I have a feeling if it had been a bump he'd have collapsed and taken the free kick. As it was, he had nothing to gain by staying down, because the ref was definitely going to give the foul, so up he got.

I'd love for it to become a teaching moment though - Look! Look what happens when you get back on your feet!

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:43 PM on June 19

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

The finish may have been nearly a formality, but this effort from Switzerland gets my vote for best team goal so far.

That was a really good goal. I especially liked Behrami riding the tackle. Rodriguez looked good for pretty much that whole game. If he puts in another two performances like that he'll be at Spurs before you know it.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:31 AM on June 19

World Cup Confidence Pool Leader

I'm going to pretend the upside-down nature of this World Cup is why I'm doing so terribly.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 09:43 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

At least Spain didn't reach a point where one of their players attempted to headbutt another of their players. So they have that over Cameroon at least.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 07:55 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

posted by Mr Bismarck at 05:35 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

There's going to be a riot in Spain tonight.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 03:52 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

OMG this is the best World Cup ever.

If the rest of today's games can live up to that one, it's going to be a great day, for sure.

Sorry to see the back of Tim Cahill - one of those players you generally really don't like until he's on your team, but always gives it everything he's got.

My upside-down fried told me the Aussies were going to lose every game 3-0, so he's having fun, even though the team are 0-2.

The Spanish have dropped Xavi and Pique today, in favour of Pedro and Javi Martinez, so they're clearly looking for a bit more speed from back to front.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:07 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

Netherlands.

Argentina.

I said goal of the tournament, not goal of this game.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 01:39 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Wednesday Huddle

Absolutely flawless technique from Cahill for Australia there. Any volley that goes in off the underside of the bar is an instant contender for goal of the tournament.

We'll have to see if Argentina can dig out another 35-pass build up to a goal to counter that.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:38 PM on June 18

SportsFilter: The Tuesday Huddle

Obviously, all your World Cup needs are filled by... The Economist.

168 converted penalties in World cup history, including 2014, (not including penalty shoot outs).

6 thus far in this tournament puts it on pace to smash records. There were 9 in the entire 2010 tournament and 13 in 2006.

The France 1998 tournament holds the record with 17.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:06 PM on June 17

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

I've been watching the BBC's excellent tactical camera for the whole of the first half of the Nigeria-Iran game, which means I'm uniquely positioned to be able to tell you that, so far, it's a very boring game.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 04:07 PM on June 16

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

I was calling for Bento to take Ronaldo off too. As it is, leaving him on meant he didn't have to play the last 25 minutes with 9 men, after Coentrao's injury. So there's that.

Meanwhile, Nigeria has a played called ONAZI. Appropriately he's a right winger.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 02:44 PM on June 16

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Portugal are absolutely imploding here.

Potentially good news for the USA.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 12:37 PM on June 16

SportsFilter: The Monday Huddle

Favourite part of the world cup thus far : BBC commentatorJonathan Pearce's complete failure to understand the goalline technology after it was used to confirm the second goal in France's 3-0 win over Honduras.

And the internet's reaction to it.

Former TV commentator Richard Keys also had a meltdown, claiming it wasn't a goal and how he'd told us the technology wouldn't work. Then four hours later he stated he had "got us another angle" and the ball was in.

Clearly the heat is not just getting to the players.

posted by Mr Bismarck at 11:00 AM on June 16