March 20, 2006

Fantasy Hockey Update: One month until the season ends. WeedyMcSmokey has been killing all of us for the better part of the season. Can anyone make a last minute run at him? Standings are here and trash talk is inside.

posted by qbert72 to fantasy at 09:25 AM - 51 comments

Some notes about the standings: * They're a rip-off of the Yahoo! page, and the styles didn't work inside of a SpoFi comment, which is why they're posted elsewhere. * I tried to the best of my ability and memory to link SpoFites to teams correctly. Please provide me with any correction and I will make them ASAP.

posted by qbert72 at 09:29 AM on March 20, 2006

Nice work Weedy. It looks like the real battle is between garfield and Sammy... The Battle For New Jersey!

posted by 86 at 09:37 AM on March 20, 2006

Another table here, with standings summary, number of moves and trades, and last activity:

RankTeamManagerMovesTradesLast League ActivityPoints
1Angry SamoansWeedyMcSmokey172Fri Mar 17 7:15pm PST143,5
2Peavy Road PuckwitsUfez Jones160Tue Mar 14 7:35am PST133
3Bytown Bag SkateSucca170Sun Mar 19 5:19pm PST129,5
4Return of the Kinggrum@work270Sun Mar 19 3:56pm PST128
5Los Colecosqbert72462Sun Mar 19 10:23am PST117
6Instant LunchroomDrJohnEvans121Tue Mar 14 7:07am PST115
7Bang A Gonerchicobangs240Sun Mar 19 5:52am PST112
8Ice Catsgarfield940Mon Mar 20 5:52am PST110,5
9The New Jersey SmellSamsonov14230Sun Mar 19 12:31pm PST108
10Pullet TartareThe_Black_Hand281Sat Mar 18 7:09pm PST106,5
11NoMich NumbnutsesNoMich112Mon Mar 20 7:04am PST101
12Meaty Chicken WingsMeatSaber190Sun Mar 5 6:08pm PST96
13Crap City Craphawksgsmp231Fri Mar 17 5:00am PST87,5
14Parkdale Roachesmkn160Fri Feb 24 11:26am PST85,5
15The Poison Oaksjasonspaceman130Fri Dec 30 4:22am PST79
16Trox's Trasherstrox60Tue Jan 17 9:24am PST69,5
17Oiler4life?10Tue Nov 29 6:02pm PST62,5
18Barrie Platypuseswfrazerjr91Thu Feb 9 5:55am PST46
19The Slapshotsdaddisamm211Fri Feb 24 6:26am PST43
20Zombonieslilnemo11Tue Nov 22 10:32am PST17
I think it's safe to say that mad waiver wire action, which garfield and myself are fond of, does not correlate to results. One other pattern that I can see here: people who stop taking care of their teams drop in the standings. And they suck, too. Unless they're wfrazerjr, who's got the baby excuse, so he gets a free pass, valid this season only. Congrats!

posted by qbert72 at 09:59 AM on March 20, 2006

My season has been a 5-month long scramble to try and recuperate from a poor draft and season-ending injuries to two of my starting goaltenders. I take the blame for the draft: Alexei Morozov in 6th round, hello? As I was saying on the league board, I've only got 3 players left on my squad from the 15 I drafted. That's how bad it's been. Hits: Bryan McCabe (5th round pick), Marek Svatos, Curtis Sanford, Marek Zidlicky, Mikael Nylander, Andrej Meszaros (all picked on waivers) Misses: Alex Mogilny. And a slew of guys I dropped too quickly. TBD: trading Luongo for Jokinen. Would have been brilliant had Sanford not sprained his ankle two days later. Now my already suspect goalie squad is looking at taking my GAA down the drain. Thoughts on the season: how did we let Weedy get away with that lineup? Aren't we supposed to know hockey?

posted by qbert72 at 10:16 AM on March 20, 2006

As long as I can beat at least one Canadian, I'll feel good. Plus, my first year playing fantasy hockey, and I actually held the league lead for a month or so. Back off, man, I'm just trying to find positives!

posted by The_Black_Hand at 10:20 AM on March 20, 2006

I was on the top of the standings about a week or two in, and since then it's been a drought. Literally. In the first week, I was at the top of the scoring charts. Since then? Dead last. For all except SHP -- which, oddly enough, was what was keeping me down in the first month. Damn. This is yet another spectacular failure for me in the fantasy league... and this is a sport I actually know something about. *sigh* At least I have my fourth place Olympicks ribbon (in my profile -- though I tied for third damnit!)

posted by mkn at 11:07 AM on March 20, 2006

I refuse to concede defeat! I think that the last two weeks will bring about a much closer finish than what is showing right now. I WANT MY THREE-PEAT! *sob*

posted by grum@work at 11:43 AM on March 20, 2006

grum, keep in mind that you were defending champion for three years. Just like the Blue Jays! Does that help?

posted by DrJohnEvans at 12:19 PM on March 20, 2006

Blue Jays were defending champions for three years? And if grum was like the Jays, I've been like the Leafs.

posted by mkn at 01:04 PM on March 20, 2006

Blue Jays as defending champions: 1993, 1994, 1995 Ten years later, grum as defending champion: 2003-04, 2004-05, 2005-06

posted by DrJohnEvans at 02:01 PM on March 20, 2006

WICKED! I am beating everybody that has abandoned the pool!

posted by gspm at 02:47 PM on March 20, 2006

Well, this was my first fantasy league anything, and I was afraid Commishing it would be a lot worse than it was. (As a player, I realized how little I knew about how these things work, and I'll make fewer mistakes next time.) I ain't gonna win this thing, but I'll be happy if I can finish in the first division. I banked a lot on Rick Nash, who was out for half the season, and if it weren't for Anson Carter & Tomas Holmstrom, I'd be sleeping with the fishes myself.

posted by chicobangs at 02:56 PM on March 20, 2006

I can't get the hang of this rotisserie thing...but I haven't totally abandoned my team, either...

posted by MeatSaber at 04:09 PM on March 20, 2006

Grum@work at least you have a recent costanza so you technically have a dynasty in SportsFilter pickem's and fantasy leagues. Plus the costanza looks better than both your other trophies.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 06:52 PM on March 20, 2006

I wasn't fortunate enough to play this year, but I'm definately in next year! Any thought of a head-to-head league? Just wondering. Next year you will see a new champion -- Baseball Prospectus!!!

posted by wingnut4life at 09:31 PM on March 20, 2006

Can someone who's more knowledgable than me explain how I've lost both Nagy and Cole for the season (plus Mats 6 weeks off) and had johnny-come-5-hole for goalies, yet my stupid TX-residing ass is in second? I'm stymied. I mean, it's cool, and fun, but honestly, wtf?

posted by Ufez Jones at 12:55 AM on March 21, 2006

Simple. God likes Texans more. Bush having a direct line red-phone to the Almighty doesn't hurt either.

posted by garfield at 09:32 AM on March 21, 2006

I think this is going to get a little closer as the season wraps up. Max games played means I won't be playing Spezza, Straka or Stoll in a week. Then I won't be playing Kovolchuk or Zetterberg a week after that - then no Heatley or Sykora a week after that. So there may be some more jockeying to due. Of course, my leads in goals, assists, PPPs, and +/- should stay pretty good. I can't loose many more points in GAA and the Belfour injury means I have two starting goalies again -which should keep me going in wins and saves. That and the only place where I have a chance to get some more points is PMs. I have picked up some goon defencemen to ride the wave home.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 02:13 PM on March 21, 2006

I have picked up some goon defencemen to ride the wave home. That was blatantly obvious, yet nobody's answering. Come on, middle-of-the-pack people, let's get some brawl in your team to fight off Weedy! Seriously, I think Weedy's safe too. His lead in the offensive categories is just too big, and Mikael Fucking Tellqvist is going to save his goalie stats. Me, I'm still scrapping for second. I'm on a hot streak right now, so I'm expecting to cool off pretty soon. I'll post another update in two weeks. Oh, and Weedy, where's the trash talk? You're entitled to it.

posted by qbert72 at 08:26 AM on March 22, 2006

So you wanna start a secondary pool as to how many moves garfield will have made by the end of the season? I'll take 106. He's obviously slowing down.

posted by chicobangs at 12:09 PM on March 22, 2006

I'm afraid he won't even top 100. He's running out of games, so there's no longer a pressing need to roll personnel.

posted by qbert72 at 12:44 PM on March 22, 2006

But then he could game the secondary pool by just swapping players that are uselss to him anyway. Hey garfield, wanna trade centres?

posted by DrJohnEvans at 12:58 PM on March 22, 2006

Rick Nash for a bag of pucks? He's healthy and productive now, just when I can't use him anymore.

posted by chicobangs at 01:08 PM on March 22, 2006

I'm not that screwed on the games played, qbert. I took your warning to heart, so only my RWs are way past the limit, which of course is my most productive position. But only playing one center for a few weeks can work miracles....or improve a dismal outlook to partly less cloudy. And if anybody has RW or LW starts to give, grab Havlat. I dropped him before I read he has been practicing on a line with Heatley and Alfredo. As for moves, I'll probably end the season right on the century mark, for aesthetic value.

posted by garfield at 01:22 PM on March 22, 2006

I'll gloat when no one catches me. I've fluxtuated so wildly in the last three weeks (+ 4.5; -6?!?!) that I'm not going to crow until I know fo shizzle that I'm the man. Then I'm gonna rub it in grum's face until baseball season is over. He may be the baseball guru in our fair city - but this.. This here is HOCKEYTOWN.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 02:32 PM on March 22, 2006

Then I'm gonna rub it in grum's face until baseball season is over. He may be the baseball guru in our fair city - but this.. This here is HOCKEYTOWN. I just want you to think about this for a second. What happens if, for some inexplicable reason, I'm able to pull off a miracle win? Can you imagine how absolutely insufferable I'll be when the next NHL regular season fantasy starts? I've done my fair share of taunting at the start of this season, but it would be NOTHING compared to how it would be if I pulled off the 3peat after reading the above statement...

posted by grum@work at 03:20 PM on March 22, 2006

Well, there's your opportunity. It wouldn't be fun if your revenge was less than super delicious. I just don't see how you can make the roster moves needed to pull it off. Your guys are going to have to simply catch fire. I see you potentially taking more points in goals, PIMs and wins - but I don't think you're going to be taking them from me. I could lose a couple points in PIMs, wins and saves (by virtue of Matt Garon sucking so hard he rides pine) but I think most of my leads are safe in goals, assists, points, PPPs and +/-. Besides, were I to lose a pool despite leading the league in five categories, I'd claim victory anyway. Convenient - no?

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 03:36 PM on March 22, 2006

Leading in 5 categories? Where? And your +/- title is not assured at all. Those goon defensemen of yours will make sure of that. I'm granting you G, A and PPP. That's it.

posted by qbert72 at 03:45 PM on March 22, 2006

Speaking of categories, am I alone in thinking that shorthanded points are The Suck, in hindsight? They're a as much a crapshoot as SH% and the totals are so low it's impossible to manage. I vote them off the island.

posted by qbert72 at 03:49 PM on March 22, 2006

This here is HOCKEYTOWN.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 04:08 PM on March 22, 2006

They're a as much a crapshoot as SH% and the totals are so low it's impossible to manage. I vote them off the island. Add my vote to that list. I could lose a couple points in PIMs, wins and saves (by virtue of Matt Garon sucking so hard he rides pine) but I think most of my leads are safe in goals, assists, points, PPPs and +/-. I agree that it'll take a miraculous finale 3 weeks, but I don't necessarily need to improve THAT much to catch you. I just have to make up half the difference, and you could drop half the difference (because other people pass you), and then we've got a catfight finale. I'm not betting any money on it, but I wouldn't say it's impossible.

posted by grum@work at 04:59 PM on March 22, 2006

You guys trippin' me out, man! I love HOCKEYTOWN!!! Ooooooooo...catfight...

posted by wingnut4life at 05:00 PM on March 22, 2006

Add my vote to that list. Harrumph! Huzzah! Hear Hear! Second time in two days that I've used the phrase "hear hear." Strange, that.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 05:04 PM on March 22, 2006

Oh shit. I just checked my max games played. I'm pretty much F-ed in the B.

posted by Samsonov14 at 05:54 PM on March 22, 2006

Samsonov14, be sure to check the other teams' max games played too. It might cheer you up.

posted by qbert72 at 06:27 PM on March 22, 2006

So, at this point, we're all going to be playing left wingers, defensemen, and goalies the last week of the season. This should be exciting.

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:53 AM on March 23, 2006

Fucking shorthanded points. I had 2 of them on the bench, yesterday and the day before. That would have given me 3 more points, right there. You fuckers fuckers fuck. /Dennis Hopper

posted by qbert72 at 07:23 AM on March 23, 2006

Yeah - I'm not a fan of the short-handed points either. It's the wild card. Outside of all the bluster and faux-gloating, I did well thanks to one trade and four good picks - plus taking Marty Straka off the waiver wire on the first day. Having Heatley, Zetterberg (he was my best pick), Kovolchuk and Lidstrom has made my team easy - none of them have gotten injured. Getting Spezza and Theodore in a deal really helped - especially considering that Lindros played barely 20 games after that trade. But I do remember starting with a team with Lindros, Allison, Kolzig, and Brett Hull.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 07:52 AM on March 23, 2006

I still have a full season's worth of rover games left to play.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:29 AM on March 23, 2006

But I do remember starting with a team with Lindros, Allison, Kolzig, and Brett Hull. Actually you started with Mogilny, which you traded to me for Kolzig, which you later traded away in your blockbuster deal. At least Kolzig is still playing.

posted by qbert72 at 09:42 AM on March 23, 2006

That's right. Mogliny. Sorry about that one Q - that looked much more fair at the time. Definitely worked out as a one-sided deal in the end.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 10:12 AM on March 23, 2006

Don't be sorry, it's part of the game. It could have gone either way. Mogilny was producing at a regular clip for a while. And I didn't have to pay his salary.

posted by qbert72 at 10:19 AM on March 23, 2006

Fucking shorthanded points. I had 2 of them on the bench, yesterday and the day before. That would have given me 3 more points, right there. You fuckers fuckers fuck. /Dennis Hopper Scarface, dude

posted by Samsonov14 at 11:37 AM on March 25, 2006

That was cool, Samsonov14. I was citing Blue Velvet. Apparently, the exact quote is "Fuck you, you fucking fuck!". Said to Isabella Rossellini's vagina, if I recall correctly (it's been a while).

posted by qbert72 at 12:09 PM on March 25, 2006

Oh Samsonov, that was grrrrrrrreat! I commend whoever pieced all of that together. That takes me back to when I use to play the Scarface drinking game (drinking every time there was a cuss word said). Man I use to get fucked up...

posted by wingnut4life at 12:25 PM on March 25, 2006

That's a recipe for advanced alcoholism.

posted by WeedyMcSmokey at 04:29 PM on March 25, 2006

Who has John Madden? He finally scored his first SH goal of the season.

posted by njsk8r20 at 07:14 PM on March 28, 2006

Madden is a free agent. 30pt centers are not a hot commodity.

posted by qbert72 at 08:27 PM on March 28, 2006

I have tonnes of 30pt centres, if anybody wants one.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 09:40 PM on March 28, 2006

I had you all right where I wanted you, ready to make a late-season run with my secret weapon, Martin Havlat! Mwah-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa---wait, somebody waivered him right out from under me! Curses, foiled again!

posted by The_Black_Hand at 04:37 AM on March 29, 2006

Man, I can't believe all the spam I get. What really bugs me are all the blatant phishing attempts. I mean, look at this email trying to pretend it's from Yahoo: Fortunately, I wasn't fooled for a minute.

posted by DrJohnEvans at 08:46 AM on March 29, 2006

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