April 27, 2007

MLB Credits Hank Aaron With 50 Lost Home Runs : In what Major League Baseball officials are calling a "long overdue correction of a gross oversight," Commissioner Bud Selig announced Tuesday the discovery that Hall of Famer Hank Aaron had in fact accumulated 50 previously unaccounted-for home runs during his illustrious 22-year baseball career, bringing his once record total of 755 to an even higher 805 and putting the all-time home-run record perhaps forever out of reach.

read story | posted by mr_crash_davis to Baseball at 1:49 PM CDT (65 comments total)

Potential commenters.... please read the link before freaking out.

posted by jerseygirl at 2:10 PM CDT on April 27

This is kinda funny, but i bet that many people are hoping that such a situation actually occurs.

posted by brainofdtrain at 2:10 PM CDT on April 27

Well said jg, 'cause I didn't find it completely unbelievable either.

posted by yerfatma at 2:11 PM CDT on April 27

I think there's been a gross oversight here. From the years 1987-1995, the Aaron grandchildren hit a combined 237 homers on various baseball games on the original Nintendo game console. MLB has no basis to discount such monumental feats of athleticism, so the record needs to be 1042.

Kiss my ass, Barry.

posted by tahoemoj at 2:13 PM CDT on April 27

Oh, if only this were true.

posted by vito90 at 2:23 PM CDT on April 27

Dear Alex Rodriguez:

Please hit 800 home runs this year.

Thanks,
Baseball

posted by The Crafty Sousepaw at 2:24 PM CDT on April 27

I was at the "Empty Stadium Game" and I can attest to the fact that Hammerin' Hank was in rare form that day. Had a devil of a time getting a hot dog though, what with my lousy seats and all.

posted by THX-1138 at 2:29 PM CDT on April 27

This means Barry Bonds won't break the record until September.

posted by dyams at 2:29 PM CDT on April 27

I was going for August but September sounds about right.

posted by BornIcon at 2:36 PM CDT on April 27

Crafty,

You hit the nail on the head with that one. Although not embraced by all, most if not all, of baseball fans would rather see A-Rod hold this record if it has to be broken.

posted by brainofdtrain at 2:57 PM CDT on April 27

You know, I gotta say, I'm kind of okay with Barry Bonds these days.

Sure, he's a deeply spiteful world-class jackass who has happily taken on the mantle of The Guy Who's Ruining The Sport, and he yells long and hard at sportswriters who then turn around and waste their airtime on Around the Horn and The Sports Reporters telling stories about how Barry eats babies and voted for Nader in '04 and runs sweatshops out of his basement and never called Dorothy Mantooth back after taking her out for a nice seafood dinner, but you know, he seems to have decided he's going to break Hank's record and consequences be damned, and he holds his head high after games and continues to give attitude and be the sonofabitch everyone thinks he is. Last year, you could really see him wrestling with the idea of whether what he was doing is the right thing.

This year, there doesn't seem to be any question. He's made his peace, and if Aaron & Selig don't want to come out to the ballpark, and if the Giants aren't even gonna stop the game when he hits 756 (or whatever the Onion decides the number'll be), it's clear he no longer cares.

Good on you for just being the bastard you are, Barry. I like the spite in you.

posted by chicobangs at 3:00 PM CDT on April 27

I kid thee not- my heartrate increased when I started to read the column. Then, alas: reality. Gotta love The Onion
.!

posted by IRUNNIKE87 at 3:00 PM CDT on April 27

Watch it chico, Dorthy Mantooth is a saint.

posted by BornIcon at 3:04 PM CDT on April 27

Exactly my point!

posted by chicobangs at 3:09 PM CDT on April 27

Although not embraced by all, most if not all, of baseball fans would rather see A-Rod hold this record if it has to be broken.

That's because he absolutely MUST be clean, right?

I mean, he's passed every drug test.

posted by grum@work at 3:21 PM CDT on April 27

Honestly, it's because of people on this site that have changed my attitude on Barry Bonds. I agree with Chico that he's probably not the nicest guy, but until he's proven guilty, hit all the homers you want. Put 'em in the books. Lose Dorothy's number. I also think if Hank and Selig don't attend, then bad form on them.

posted by THX-1138 at 3:21 PM CDT on April 27

ahhh Barry Bonds, in the video game MLB2K7, he is listed as a Joe Young. The d*ckhead wouldnt even put his name in a video game, I guess he's just to good for us loser "fans" and his fellow MLB-ers who are all in it.

Oh well, I still went 4-5 with two homers with "Mighty Joe Young"

I agree with your point mildly THX, but its like OJ, we all know the truth, its just there arent any "facts" which for Barry is the fact he hasnt failed a piss test...but neither did Gaimbi, McGwire, Conseco, Palmeiro, oops, scratch that last one.

posted by dezznutz at 3:30 PM CDT on April 27

I don't think Barrys' gonna be to happy about this. He'll have to wait till September to retire and dodge more drug tests.

posted by TelamarketersBeware at 3:38 PM CDT on April 27

...in the video game MLB2K7, he is listed as a Joe Young

But you can edit him to make him look more like Barry Bond which is what I did. The only thing is, when he comes up to bat, Jim Miller and Joe Morgan still calls him Joe Young. 2KSports probably couldn't pay enough for his likeness.

posted by BornIcon at 4:00 PM CDT on April 27

I kid thee not- my heartrate increased when I started to read the column. Then, alas: reality. Gotta love The Onion!

Me too.

posted by tommytrump at 4:03 PM CDT on April 27

I get all my news from the Onion.... Rep. Dennis Kucinich (D-OH)

posted by steve8ko at 5:05 PM CDT on April 27

I'm with Stevo; if its in the Onion it must be true.After all it is America's finest news source and has been for over 100 years.

posted by sickleguy at 5:38 PM CDT on April 27

Please tell me the article about Hank's added homeruns is true. Couldn't happen to better guy. If it puts steroid barry out of reach so much the better

posted by simiross at 6:21 PM CDT on April 27

Well said jg, 'cause I didn't find it completely unbelievable either.

Apparently you weren't the only one.

posted by jerseygirl at 6:35 PM CDT on April 27

Slightly related -- a scientific study on who roided it up better, Barry or Mark.

posted by Ufez Jones at 6:56 PM CDT on April 27

I feel the need to point out that only Barry is playing when steriods are illegal, the majority of the other named players did nothing illegal

posted by shudacudawuda at 6:59 PM CDT on April 27

After all it is America's finest news source and has been for over 100 years

However, I hear they've just discovered another 50 previously unaccounted for years...

posted by owlhouse at 7:31 PM CDT on April 27

This was the first thing I saw when I came to the front page and my first thought was what the fuck? I sat there for a few seconds wondering how the MLB could pull this off, then I clicked on the link. Gotta love the onion. Nice post crash.

posted by Ying Yang Mafia at 7:45 PM CDT on April 27

Why can't you guys and girls just stop whining about it? It's really become tiresome. Let the guy hit all the HRs he can. He hasn't been proven guilty. After all, we live in a country where it is "Innocent until proven guilty" not "Guilty until proven Innocent." Barry will break the record, he will do what records are meant for. After he breaks it and somehow evidence is found that he did cheat, strike him from the record books and that will be the end of that. The record is still going to be broken by A-Rod, so all of your complaining will be worthless in twenty years.

posted by STUNNER at 8:17 PM CDT on April 27

Its a fake article from a satirical website. Sorry if our fun times offended you to the core.

posted by jerseygirl at 8:40 PM CDT on April 27

Who's whining anyway?

posted by everett at 8:51 PM CDT on April 27

I have never seen such blatent rediculousness... Is it a coincidence at the end of the article are the names of the players caught up in the riod-scandal?
I've never seen such hatred for a player. Regardless of whatever, Barry Bonds is still one of the greatest players that ever played baseball. He's proving it everyday. he's currently batting .345, 7hrs, obp .486 and slg .782 at 42yrs old. In this age of mediocrity gone wild. How can we allow ourselves to tear down true greatness. It says something about us a s a society!

posted by oraustin at 11:09 PM CDT on April 27

That is some fantastic journalism right there. The Onion is my hero.

Speaking of Inalienable Rights and Uncle Sam and Apple Pie, if enough people wrote their Congresspersons about the travesty that is Barry Bonds, couldn't they form a Subcommittee on Professional Sports Records to make something like this actually happen? Seems like a matter worthy of a Constitutional amendment to me. After all, where else should my tax dollars go to work?

posted by cybermac at 12:21 AM CDT on April 28

I have no doubt that Bonds took steroids. I don't need a failed test. But all things considered, I guess I'm more in Chicobang's camp.

Barry is just the biggest example of a problem baseball ignored for too long, and I'm pretty sure he's not the nicest guy in the world. Still, with everyone seemingly against him, he doesn't seem to give a damn. He's taken on a 'me against the world' attitude and I doubt I could do the same. I admire him in a twisted, shameful way.

posted by justgary at 3:02 AM CDT on April 28

It's funny to watch some preface their compliments.

It's kind of like saying, 'good for you Barry, you dickhead'. It's almost like you have to acknowledge he is an asshole before rendering him any due just to avoid argument or even worse being mistaken for someone who is pro Barry. Oh my God imagine the horror.

so all of your complaining will be worthless in twenty years.

But until then, keep that valuable complaining coming.

posted by Bishop at 3:45 AM CDT on April 28

Slightly related -- a scientific study on who roided it up better, Barry or Mark.
posted by Ufez Jones

Ha. Now if we can get a third column with The Rocket.

posted by justgary at 4:21 AM CDT on April 28

It's too bad the home runs, along with his own alienating attitude, overshadow what has been an incredible career for Bonds. The guy has been an amazing player since he came into the league, and until the past few years, he was an all-around factor in all categories. The steroids controversy will taint anything he's done, but the guy has always been able to hit the damn ball. Seven MVPs, a bunch of Gold Gloves, several silver slugger awards, etc. all add up to a fantastic career. If he did use PEDs, which it obviously appears he did, it's really too bad, because he didn't need them to be a Hall of Famer.

posted by dyams at 7:48 AM CDT on April 28

Okay, now I'm pissed. Since the release of MLB 2K5, I have hit well over 800 homers. Where the hell am I on Selig's list?

posted by jls_king at 10:32 AM CDT on April 28

jls_king, you're probably just ahead of Willie Mays on the official all-time list, then.

oraustin, welcome to Spofi, and welcome to the Onion! (Follow the links around that site a little bit for more "blatent rediculousness!")

posted by chicobangs at 10:54 AM CDT on April 28

It's funny to watch some preface their compliments.

I know. I just laugh and laugh.

Although I don't think it's so much complimenting him as it is acknowledging the fact that what he's doing is quite remarkable. I have to remind myself that expressing hatred for someone I don't really know could be construed as "blatent rediculousness".

(I do like that phrase, however)

posted by THX-1138 at 12:33 PM CDT on April 28

2KSports probably couldn't pay enough for his likeness.

Actually, Bonds had previously opted out of the MLBPA licensing agreement a while back. So it would have required a separate deal to get his name in the game.

As well, there are a few (5 or 6?) players in MLB right now that do not appear in video games because they are the scabs from the strike/lockout period. They went against the union and therefore are no longer eligible to receive royalties.

posted by grum@work at 12:51 PM CDT on April 28

Maybe we should also start counting K's for pitchers when the ball was fouled on the 3rd strike???

posted by bavarianmotorworker at 2:16 PM CDT on April 28

It's kind of like saying, "Good for you Barry, you dickhead."

That's exactly what I'd like to hear when he breaks Ruth's record.

CRACK!

"And there she goes, No. 756, and Barry Bonds is the all-time home run king! Bonds is circling the bases while fans read programs, head for a tinkle or generally find something less offensive to do than cheer for him. Now, let's go down to the field and a special presentation from commissioner Bud Selig!"

(short pause as several people remove their noses from Bud's ass)

"Good for you, Barry ... you dickhead."

(Selig hands Bonds a large dildo)

"From all of us -- baseball executives, management, players and fans -- go fuck yourself."

(Selig slams down mic WWE-style and stomps off)

posted by wfrazerjr at 3:11 PM CDT on April 28

"From all of us -- baseball executives, management, players and fans -- go fuck yourself."

Many fans might want to say that to Barry, but Selig? Baseball executives, management, players? I say, Fuck Them! Baseball was (and continues to be) happy as hell the sport is doing well, both popularity-wise and financially. Major League Baseball only wishes nobody would have ever given them a hard time about these drugs, because they would have been only too happy to continue with the Sosa/McGwire bullshit from a few years back, or the excitement with Bonds breaking McGwire's record. And other players don't want to risk opening their own mouths and risk killing the goose that lays the golden eggs. Fans love seeing home runs, and watching Hank Aaron on fading video clips isn't going to cut it. Baseball doesn't want to hear about it, test for it, or do anything about it. If absolutely forced to, they'll make a sacrificial lamb out of some marginal player. That's the extent of it.

posted by dyams at 4:57 PM CDT on April 28

Let me preface my compliments by saying, "I'm not whining, it's the Onion that makes me cry, you dickhead."

That's exactly what I'd like to hear when he breaks Ruth's record.

Fraze, that's beautiful. Please excuse me while I get off the floor and reassemble my ass.

posted by Howard_T at 5:40 PM CDT on April 28

Okay, it's widely accepted that Barry Bonds has become a needle-butt. We all know that he's not the most accepting character. Asshole, you could also make an argument for, but would u like the media in your face all day?

Still, regardless of ALL THAT, you still have to respect Bonds for his achievement. Why? Because hitting a baseball is damn hard. Steroids or not, nobody on this post could EVER hit a home run off a major league pitcher. At least I can't, and I'm a pretty dam good athlete. And steroids don't help so much with strength as much as they help muscle recovery. That means you can do more with you muscles in less time.

So, he might have been able to hit them slightly more often. That still doesn't account for his clearly superior bat speed, not to mention his batter's eye, which is regarded by almost everyone in the know as the best in baseball. He doesn't strike out very often, and that has less to do with steroids than anything else. Also, players get big when they get older. That's natural. There are a few exceptions (see: the still svelte Kenny Lofton), but MOST players gain a few pounds towards the twilight of their career, as their fresh runner's legs disappear. The same thing will happen to A-Rod. The only players off the top of my mind who are exceptions are the elite baserunners like rickey henderson and kenny lofton who don't have the option of exclusively hitting for power. That's not their game.

Accounting for the muscle recovery factor, Bonds might have hit somewhere between 30-120 less home runs. That's still pretty dam good. Especially when you admit that many of his home runs may have been hit against needle-butt pitchers. Whether he goes first ballot or not, he deserves to be in the Hall of Fame. In the meantime, the man has the right to be an asshole, and celebrate his achievement which he'll almost surely get by July (yeah, I said it) for what it is and not who/how it is.

posted by kbdatkidd at 5:43 PM CDT on April 28

"Steroids or not, nobody on this post could EVER hit a home run off a major league pitcher."

I was in the show for 21 days once.- the 21 greatest days of my life.

posted by mr_crash_davis at 5:56 PM CDT on April 28

the man has the right to be an asshole

Everyone has a right to be an asshole. Transcendence is when you realize there's no value in it.

celebrate his achievement which he'll almost surely get by July (yeah, I said it)

OH SNAP! Everybody back up! This shit is hawt.

posted by yerfatma at 6:16 PM CDT on April 28

I fully support anyone trying to bring OH SNAP! back into vogue. I'm not even voting Obama anymore; I'm going to write in yerfatma.

moving on...

THIS IS WHY I DO NOT GO TO GAMES ANY MORE. WHEN THEY GET THE BAD GUYS OUT OF THE BALL PARK IMAY COME BACK. GET RID OF THE DRUG BUG.

Dear bobwiltse... welcome to Sportsfilter, or shall I say, thanks for finally making a comment! 14 months! That was a long time to hold it. Felt good right? That's what she said. Anyway, please read our guidelines. It outlines our rules of the road here. I think you'll find it useful. I hope you get your keyboard fixed or are able to obtain a new model at your nearest retailer. Broken caps lock is such a drag.

posted by jerseygirl at 6:39 PM CDT on April 28

If you're interested, I still have a BP slut, er, uhm, VP slot available. And I believe in the power of "That's what SHE said!"

posted by yerfatma at 7:33 PM CDT on April 28

You know, there's a part of me that likes watching people's heads explode over this. That's the part of this I don't understand.

I haven't spent a penny on Major League baseball since '94, and I don't miss it. It's a sideshow. It's not like your family or the government, where what they do really affects your life and you should pay attention and participate as much as you can, whatever you believe. It's baseball, fergodsake. Barry Bonds has made his peace with the fact that he's a villain in this little play, and you know, you'll miss him when he's gone. Barry is cartoon-evil, not the real thing. He's not eatring your children or driving your property values down or keeping Two And A Half Men on the air or prolonging the Iraq War. He's a baseball player. He may be cheating, but He's playing the heel to the hilt, and he's enjoying it. He expects you to hate him, and so many of you are happy to oblige. Everybody wins.

Enjoy the evil that is Barry Bonds while he's here. Accept the little piece of the Dark Side that resides within you.

posted by chicobangs at 11:39 PM CDT on April 28

He doesn't strike out very often, and that has less to do with steroids than anything else.

It just may have a lot else to do with the fact that he is the single season walk (232), and intentional walk (120) record holder.

posted by jojomfd1 at 4:10 AM CDT on April 29

He's not eatring your children or driving your property values down or keeping Two And A Half Men on the air or prolonging the Iraq War.

I'm still actively seeking someone to blame for keeping that horrible show going. I'll cross Barry off that list. One question, though: Which one's the half man?

posted by dyams at 8:04 AM CDT on April 29

Okay, it's widely accepted that Barry Bonds has become a needle-butt

Ooooo....Neddle-butt.....sick burn!

posted by HATER 187 at 12:02 PM CDT on April 29

dyams, here's the secret: they all are! (They have Burt Lancaster's ashes in an urn hidden in the broom closet on the set, just to even out the math.)

posted by chicobangs at 12:19 PM CDT on April 29

Chico: Nice!

posted by dyams at 7:24 PM CDT on April 29

I can't wait for Barry to smash Aaron out of the history books. I'm already saying Babe who?

posted by evilchris23 at 4:16 PM CDT on April 30

It's a sideshow. It's not like your family or the government, where what they do really affects your life and you should pay attention and participate as much as you can, whatever you believe. It's baseball, fergodsake.

I'm sorry, but I have to say something here. I know I like baseball more than most people, and probably more than is healthy. There are some "Truths," though, in my probably-delusional world that don't correlate with defining baseball as a frivolous sideshow:

1. Baseball reflects the heart and mind of America. Thread of the fabric and all that. Everything this guy says here rings true to me, especially:

...baseball is individualistic but does emphasize teamwork and community; it is anti-intellectual but cannot be won through sheer brute force or strength or emotion but through cleverness, thought, guile, and technical mastery of small details; it is mute like dance, but far less aesthetically and intellectually self-conscious, yet it has attracted far more intellectuals to write about it than dance ever has; it is a mass game played by children and adults but has enough intricacy to satisfy the most snobbish devotee; it has the most intense historical consciousness and historical pretension of any sport, a near prototype for the historical obsessions of other popular-culture inventions like Rock and Roll and Hollywood film, yet it readily abandons tradition for commercial advantage. Baseball has the image of stability and conservatism, yet it has been rocked by more labor disputes and unrest than any other popular-culture industry except journalism. It is the perfectly balanced centrism of its values--which historians Robert F. Burk and David Hackett Fischer argue reflect baseball's puritan origins--more perhaps than specifically what its values are, that makes baseball so meaningful to Americans as a cultural expression of the national character. There is something about baseball’s checks and balances that mirrors those checks and balances of the Constitution, of Enlightenment rationalism, of liberalism as a nineteenth-century ideology of organization and discipline, the great metaphor of self-interested individuals as self-interested association, the invisible hand of perfected design. Adam Smith as the Great Commissioner of Baseball.

2. The home run record is the most imporant sports record in America.

You can say that baseball is not your heart and mind, and you would be neither wrong nor un-American. But many of the American values, including those that permit you to freely express such an opinion, are better reflected in baseball than in any other sport, activity or cultural ritual or enterprise. You don't need to worry about whether or not you are idenitying with baseball -- just know that baseball is identifying with you. If that smacks of religious aggrandizement, please see: "Bull Durham."

You can scoff all you want about the caricaturistic zealousness with which people are reacting to Bonds' chase, but the emotion behind it is very real and justifyable. It is built on a few generations worth of cultural identity -- it's not just a popular leisure respite or arbitrary obsession -- and the folks who care deserve to do so without being shamed or belittled for doing so, regardless of how they feel about Barry Bonds.

I'm already saying Babe who?

Are you also saying, "Jackie who?"

posted by The Crafty Sousepaw at 5:11 PM CDT on April 30

You can say that baseball is not your heart and mind, and you would be neither wrong nor un-American.

Unless, of course, you happen to not be American. And Jingo is my name-o. Sorry if I was unwittingly exclusionary.

posted by The Crafty Sousepaw at 5:29 PM CDT on April 30

Although not embraced by all, most if not all, of baseball fans would rather see A-Rod hold this record if it has to be broken.

That's because he absolutely MUST be clean, right?

I mean, he's passed every drug test.

In all fairness grum, there are more reasons for "Bonds hatred" than the suspicion he did steriods. A-Rod may be cheating but at least he wants to be liked, which is more than you can say for Bonds.

I think that's half the reason why people hate him, the i don't give a crap if you hate me attitude. A-Rod on the other hand, is practically dying to be accepted in NY @ least he was the last couple years). That alone gives him an edge over Bonds in the "like-ability" department.

posted by brainofdtrain at 2:02 AM CDT on May 1

In all fairness grum, there are more reasons for "Bonds hatred" than the suspicion he did steriods

Finally someone is hinting around to what I've been saying.

posted by Bishop at 2:43 AM CDT on May 1

A-Rod may be cheating but at least he wants to be liked, which is more than you can say for Bonds.

Wanting to be liked? Is that trait really commendable? Ignoring A-Rod, not in my opinion. In fact, I'll take Bonds' 'love me or hate me' attitude. There may be other reason's not to like Bonds, but I don't think that's one of them.

I have little doubt Bonds took steroids, and yet I simply don't care if he breaks the record at this point. Just get it over with. I'd be much more excited to see someone hit 400 again.

And that was beautiful Sousepaw.

posted by justgary at 4:08 AM CDT on May 1

Sousepaw, you are absolutely and eloquently correct. Yes, the home run record is a big deal. There is probably no record more revered in American sports. But I cannot deny that I am taking a certain pleasure in reading the posts of people having aneurysms over Bonds' continued success.

Bonds will break the record, and someone else will break it after that, and that person (be it A-Rod or Pujols or Griffey or one of Steve Garvey's kids or whoever), as long as there isn't a cloud over their accomplishment, will get a ticker-tape parade, a wave of retired numbers, and their face on a stamp. Sic semper bola longa.

posted by chicobangs at 12:16 PM CDT on May 1

Sic semper bola longa

Chicks dig the long ball?

posted by qbert72 at 4:57 PM CDT on May 1

Sic semper bola longa.

That's awesome. That needs to be on a t-shirt. The very subtle linking of Bonds to Julius Caesar is perfect.

But I cannot deny that I am taking a certain pleasure in reading the posts of people having aneurysms over Bonds' continued success.

And I would never seek to deny you that sport.

posted by The Crafty Sousepaw at 6:12 PM CDT on May 1

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